I Didn't Get On The Plane
by MOPmom
Summary: What was Logan doing in the years between Season 7 and the Revival? What on Earth is he thinking during the Revival? Logan POV. Multi-chapter
1. 2007

**Author Note:** The objective here is to fill in the blanks between the Logan we saw in Season 7 and the Logan we saw in the Revival. 1-2 events from each year that shape Logan into the man he becomes. Will continue into the Revival years.

If you've never read my stuff before, my Logan can be kind of insecure and self-loathing when he and Rory have problems. But still somehow charming! All of Logan' inner thoughts are in italics.

As always, all characters belong to Gilmore Girls, and title borrows from Friends.

* * *

 **May 2007**

"Goodbye, Rory," Logan says, placing the ring box back in his pocket.

He turns and strides away from his one true love. His mind is somehow blank and panicked at the same time.

 _She said no._

 _How could she say no?_

He gets into his Porsche and realizes he has no idea where to go. He had slept on Colin's couch last night, but all of his things are still in Rory and Paris's apartment.

 _I'll have to get everything out while they're at her graduation lunch._

He calls Colin.

"Hey man. Why aren't you busy celebrating?"

Logan sighs. "She said no. We broke up."

"What? Are you serious? What did she say?" Colin asks.

"I can't talk about it right now," Logan says. "I have to get in her apartment and get all my stuff. I know you're in the middle of finals, and law school is super hard, but can you come help me? All my crap won't fit in my car."

"Yeah, sure. Give me twenty minutes to get my study group out of here, and I'll meet you there," Colin responds.

"Thanks, Colin. I'm sorry." _I'm sorry I'm such a pathetic mess._

"Don't worry about it."

He drives to Rory's apartment. He hikes up the stairs, turns all the locks, kicks the door, and heads inside, leaving the door ajar behind him for Colin.

There are boxes everywhere, some labeled, some not. He has no idea which are his.

 _How am I supposed to do this? How can I un-entwine our lives in an hour?_

He starts opening boxes and pulling things aside when they are his. There are several that contain mixtures of his and Rory's belongings, and it almost pushes him to his breaking point.

He finds his Yale t-shirt that Rory likes to sleep in. He pulls it out and brings it to his face. It smells like her shampoo.

Tears start flowing, as he realizes he will probably never smell that shampoo again.

 _How could she say no? When she asked for time last night, I figured she just needed to make a pro/con list. I never thought it wouldn't come out in my favor._

He hears a knock at the door and quickly wipes his eyes in the t-shirt so Colin won't see him crying.

He is surprised when Christopher walks in.

"Logan. I… I didn't expect to find you here. I just ran up to get Rory's purse," Christopher says.

"Uh… I needed to get my stuff out of here before she comes back."

There is an awkward silence as they acknowledge the elephant in the room.

"Logan, I can't pretend to know why Rory made this decision. I know she loves you," Christopher says.

Logan snorts. "Just not as much as I love her. I guess I've known that for a while… I just never thought… it wasn't enough."

"Maybe this is for the best then."

 _I do not want this speech right now._

"So I should be grateful she just ripped my heart out?" Logan asks.

"No, but…" he trails off. "You know, I asked Lorelei to marry me at least a dozen times."

"Oh… So I should just wait twenty years until she says yes? Is that what you're telling me?"

"No," Christopher says. "I'm telling you that our divorce was finalized last week. When she said no, she had reasons, and she meant it. Maybe Rory does too. And at least now you can move on. Do a better job than I did. You're smart and talented. And young. Make your own life."

Logan sits down and puts his head in his hands. He contemplates these words.

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm up here because she's too devastated to get out of the car."

The thought of Rory crying does not give him any consolation. "It doesn't," Logan says.

"Um, have you seen her purse?" Christopher asks, looking around. "It's pink…"

"It's over there," Logan says, pointing to the Birkin.

Christopher walks over to get it, but Logan stops him.

"If she's really upset, that purse won't make her feel any better."

He goes through a few of Rory's boxes until he finds a smaller black purse. He pulls Rory's wallet, cell phone, chapstick, and a hair tie out of the Birkin and places them in the less offensive bag.

Handing it to Christopher, he says "This should be all she needs today... But please don't tell her I'm up here. I'll have everything out before she gets home."

Chris eyes him appreciatively and offers his hand. "I would have really liked having you as my son-in-law."

Logan's lips tighten and he shakes Chris's hand. And then he's gone.

Colin enters just after Christopher leaves. He walks in and hugs Logan.

 _I know he's a huge idiot, but he's always here when I need him._

Logan picks up a box, and Colin follows suit. After a few silent trips to Colin's Range Rover, Logan looks around the apartment. He knows he is leaving some things, but he can't bear to be here anymore. He gets in his car and follows Colin back to his place.

"Steph is driving up from the city. She'll be here by dinner," Colin says as they walk into his apartment.

"She doesn't have to do that," Logan protests.

"She wants to. Just let her."

As soon as they are inside, Colin pours two glasses of Wild Turkey, and Logan slams it back.

 _Why doesn't she want to be with me? Why is her career more important than me?_

"I know you're in the middle of finals. I'm sorry I'm distracting you," Logan apologizes.

"It's no big deal," Colin says. "I only have one left. I'll just take one shot for every two you take."

"Actually… what are you holding? Then you won't have to babysit me." _I'm an obnoxious drunk, but a mellow stoner._

Colin thinks for a minute. "I know I have weed, probably some ex. That may be it. I could get some coke pretty quickly if you wanted it."

"Nah, weed's good. Go back to studying." Logan opens the cabinet door under the coffee table where Colin keeps his stash. He begins methodically packing the bowl of Colin's bong. He pulls a couple of hits and leans back unto the couch.

 _How has this happened to me? How did I get so wrapped up in a woman that I can't find my way out?_

 _Maybe the Huntzberger life is my destiny. I should go back to the company, sleep around until my mother makes me get married, and live in Hartford society._

 _I'll send my kids to private school in Switzerland so I never have to actually see them._

 _I'll jet set around the world to a different mistress in every city. I'll pay for their apartments, their diamonds, their abortions._

 _My wife and kids will hate me, but I'll be rich and powerful._

 _Goddamn, fucking shit._

 _I don't want that life._

 _I want Rory._

He pulls another hit off the bong and turns on the television. The Real World is on, and he watches aimlessly for a while.

 _These fucking clowns. I wish getting drunk and banging your hot roommate was the real world. The real world is getting dumped by the love of your life in front of her entire family. Who didn't like you much even before this debacle._

 _The real world is realizing you're a fucking Huntzberger, and all of it was decided the moment you were born anyway._

His cell phone rings, and he has a fleeting thought that maybe Rory's changed her mind. _Christopher said she was upset._

He tries to get his drug-addled thoughts in order.

" _Of course I still want to marry you. Of course I don't want to break up."_

He grabs the phone and sees that it's actually Honor.

 _Fuck. I'm going to have to tell her._

"Hey," he answers as unenthusiastically as he can, praying that she'll pick up on it.

"Congratulations, baby brother! Can I talk to my future sister-in-law?" Honor gushes.

"Um, she said no, and we broke up, so she's not really here for you to talk to," Logan says.

"Oh my God! She said no? But you guys… are so in love. Why would she say no? I don't understand!"

"Honestly, I don't understand either," Logan says. "And I'm too high right now to analyze it. Can I call you later?"

He hangs up before she can answer and hits the bong again.

 _Rory's not changing her mind. She is ridiculously stubborn, and she has made her choice. She doesn't want me. She said no, and she had reasons._

He's not sure how long he sits there getting high, but he knows he is grateful to MTV and the way they marathon mindless television on the weekends.

Eventually Colin comes out of his room to sit beside him, and soon after that Stephanie enters the apartment.

"I brought dinner," she says, sounding quietly positive.

 _She's feeling out the situation. But I don't want her pity._

"Thanks. I'm starving," Logan says.

"I'll bet," she says, taking in the bong and the marijuana all over the table. "Have a burrito."

He unwraps it and digs in. The munchies are hitting him hard.

"I got some guacamole, too. I know how much you love it," she says, opening the container and placing it in front of him.

He stares at the offending condiment. It feels like the last straw; he can't take it anymore.

He leans back against the couch and replays the events of the day.

"How can I go to California without her? I can't live in that house and pick avocados when she's not there to share it with me. Fuck it. I've got to beg Mitchum to take me back. I'm going to have to fucking beg, and he is going to love every second of it. God... Fuck my life…

Why doesn't she want to marry me? I mean, I've screwed up some, but she has to know how hard I try to be good enough for her. Why am I not good enough for her? I'm never enough for anybody. Rory, my dad, my grandpa. I'm just a spoiled, trust-fund asshole, and I should accept that."

It suddenly dawns on him that this soliloquy has happened out loud and not in his head. Stephanie and Colin are surreptitiously glancing at each other as they watch his melt down.

He feels his face flush, and he's glad he's too high to fully absorb the embarrassment.

Finally Colin says "Fuck that, Huntz. You're not crawling back to Mitchum. You got out. Do you think I actually want to be a lawyer? Of course not, but that's what I'm expected to do. So I'm doing it. None of the rest of us- me, Seth, Robert, Lanny- none of us have had the balls to do what you did. So you're going to go to California, and you're going to kick ass at this job."

Stephanie slides on the couch next to him and pulls his head unto her shoulder. She strokes his hair and says "I don't know why Rory said no, but you _are_ good enough for her. Maybe _she_ isn't good enough for _you_. You'll find someone else who wants your avocados. Someone who deserves your avocados."

 _She knows as well as I do that that's not true. But I can't think about it anymore tonight. I'm so tired._

He lays his head down in her lap and fights off the tears as Stephanie rubs his forehead. He eventually drifts off into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

He wakes up the next day to find Stephanie in the kitchen whispering to Robert and Colin.

 _What the hell? I cannot take him right now._

"Geez, Colin. Did you send out the bat signal?"

They see he's awake and move into the living room.

"No. I told Robert that Rory was single again, and he rushed right over," Colin jokes.

They all glare at him.

"Too soon?" Colin asks, as Stephanie smacks him.

"No, Huntz. I'm here because we have a great idea," Robert says. "Colin is going to take his last final, and then we are all going to road trip to California. I've got a U-haul on the back of Colin's Rover. We'll pack all your stuff and go together. Finn's in Australia, but he'll meet us once we're there."

Logan is touched. _That's really thoughtful considering how much I dislike him._

"But don't you guys have stuff to do other than babysit me? Really, I'm gonna be fine," he lies. "I'm not on suicide watch or anything."

"I'm off for two weeks once I take this test," Colin says, grabbing his bag and heading out the door.

"I'm done for ten days," offers Stephanie.

"And technically, I'm working," says Robert. "We'll stay in Westins under aliases and report back to my father how they are. Accommodations, staff, food, hospitality. We'll even make sure you get a heavenly bed out of it for your new place. Since you're kind of broke and all."

"Your job sounds great," Stephanie muses.

"Mostly it is. I'm just under the old man's thumb all of the time." Robert looks up at Logan. "You got out, Huntzberger. We're doing this for all of us."

"Okay," Logan relents. "Let's go to California!"

They start packing up, and as soon as Colin is home, they are gone. It takes them over a week to get there. They have a blast through Middle America. Stephanie in particular tends to Logan, and by the time they reach Palo Alto, Logan thinks he is going to be okay.

Once there, though, Colin and Stephanie have to fly back for school, and Robert leaves to continue his tour of Westin hotels.

Logan has about eight hours alone with his thoughts, and he realizes he is _not_ going to be okay. He is falling apart when Finn arrives at his door.

"Thank God," Logan says as he lets him in the house. "Please tell me you have more drugs, or at least know a supplier in the area."

Finn scoffs at him, because of course he does.

"When do you start your job?" Finn asks him.

"Monday."

"Drug testing?"

"I've been high for the last two weeks, so I guess I'm fucked if they do," Logan laughs.

They get high and head out to a bar. Finn immediately tests out his accent, and Logan quickly discovers he is absolutely not ready for this.

Random girls flirt, touching his arm or knee. They whisper seductively in his ear, and one slips her number in his back pocket.

 _This used to be me in my zone. I would take a couple of them home with me. But now I don't want anyone to touch my body except her._

Logan feels sicker and sicker until eventually he heads to the bathroom to puke.

Finn finds him hiding in a corner a few minutes later. "Let's get you home, mate."

Once there, Finn gets Logan a bottle of water and some aspirin.

"Logan- what really happened with Rory?"

He sighs, then relives the worst conversation of his life.

"You should just call her, mate," Finn advises. "Wouldn't you take long distance over this?"

"How can I do that? She doesn't want to marry me. What if we go three more years, and she still doesn't want the same things I want?" Logan asks.

"I don't know, Logan, but if it were me, I'd swallow my pride and call her."

 _Finn is right. Rory was right. Long distance is not worse than this. We've done it before, and I could do it again._

His high is fading, so he calls before he loses his nerve. It goes to voicemail, and he hangs up.

"She's probably sleeping, mate," Finn says.

 _Or maybe she's out celebrating her wide open future with someone else. I'm sure Jess is thrilled I'm gone._

He's keep his cell close by his bed, hoping she'll call back.

* * *

The phone wakes him up the next morning.

 _Holy shit. It's Rory._

His brain is clouded, but he grabs the phone quickly and answers before there is time to think.

"Hey."

"Hey," she says quietly.

They sit in silence for a minute.

 _Please take me back. Please forgive me for walking away._

Finally, she asks "Did you call me last night?"

"I did," he says. "But you didn't answer, and I…"

"Sorry, I was asleep. You didn't leave a message, and I wanted to make sure you were okay," Rory says.

 _Am I okay? No, I'm not fucking okay. My heart is a mess of bloody pulp, and my head only functions on massive amounts of drugs._

 _She's okay? And she's just checking on poor, pitiful me?_

 _God, I'm such a fool._

He wipes away an errant tear.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine…" _I miss you so much._ "I was just out with Finn, and he wondered, um, how you were doing…" _And if you'd give me another chance._ "And, um, so we called… but now that it seems you're fine…" _How the hell are you fine?_ "I'll just pass that along."

 _I am a fucking moron._

"Oh, okay. Well, how is California?" Rory asks.

 _Does she think I want to make small talk?_

"Uh, great…" _Would be better with you._ "Sunshine and all that…"

They retreat back to the awkward silence.

 _I can't take this. I can't let her know how broken I am, while she's just fucking peachy._

"Well, I've got to go. Glad to hear you're doing so great, and um… bye, I guess," he stammers.

Her voice is small. "Okay. Take care of yourself, Logan."

He hangs up before she can hear him sniffling.

 _She said no. She had reasons._

Logan walks out to the living room and packs a bowl.

 _I am only going to wallow for three more days. Once I start my job, I'm a new man._

 _Life as I know it is over. No more Rory, no more HPG, no more drugs. I have to get my shit together._

 _As Mitchum would say, "Time to grow up."_

* * *

 **October 2007**

"So Logan tell me about yourself," Julie says. Logan looks over at John's wife.

"Well, what do you want to know? I'm pretty simple," he responds. "I'm a trust fund brat from Connecticut, but I left my family's company, and I've settled in here with your husbands. Who are excellent partners."

"Okay. But that's the stuff we already know. What do you like to do? When you're not working with these two. What are you into?" Aimee asks.

Logan shifts his eyes to John and Kevin who are giving him apologetic looks.

Logan clears his throat, and Kevin laughs. "You wanted to get to know our wives!"

"You're right. I did. So, um, honestly, since I've been in California, I haven't gotten into much. We work a lot, ya know." Logan gives them his most charming smile.

"What Aimee was getting at is- are you single?" Julie says.

"I was trying to be more subtle than that," Aimee says. "But are you?"

"Oh, yes. I'm…single."

 _It still feels weird to say that._

"And you're…?" Julie says to Logan.

"I'm…?" Logan raises his eyebrows.

"He's straight," Kevin answers.

Logan laughs. "Yes, I'm straight."

"Hey. We live in San Francisco. I had to ask before I start setting him up with women," Julie says.

John scoffs. "Maybe Logan doesn't want to be set up with your friends, dear."

 _This is uncomfortable._

Aimee turns to him. "Do you want to be set up? Because we both have friends who would love you."

"Oh… uh, I don't… um…"

 _I should be ready to date. It's been four months since my heart was completely crushed. And I'm better. Much better. I only think about her five minutes a day._

"Maybe," Logan finally answers.

 _Although that's a self-imposed limit that I break frequently._

"We're a little older than you. Do you have an age limit?" Julie asks.

John puts his head in his hands. "I'm so sorry, man." Turning to Julie, he says "We talked about this on the ride over here."

Logan smiles. "It's fine. Um, probably thirty-five would be my limit, but I'm not one to discriminate."

Both women turn to each other and start discussing Logan's prospects.

"I'm sorry, Logan. They've both been dying to set you up since they met you. Apparently, you're very handsome. And their single friends are very horny, and they want to sleep with you. I promise Kevin and I will screen them," John says.

"Just no crazies, okay?" Logan says.

Logan goes back to his dinner, chewing slowly and thinking about the conversation. He drinks his wine and ponders his situation.

 _I could really stand to get laid… Horny cougars might be great._

 _I guess I'm going to have to start dating again._

 _Ugh._

* * *

A/N: I will try and update this regularly, but I am in the middle of my other work-in-progress, London Baby. Those chapters are a lot longer and require more rewatch/research. I just needed to get some of my revival thoughts going. And if you need any further backstory on what's happening with Logan, Colin, Stephanie, etc, check out my other fics. They are all in this universe.


	2. 2008

Author Note: Here we are in 2008! These are snippets out of Logan's life that are shaping him into the guy we see in the Revival. As always, Logan's inner thoughts are in italics.

All characters belong to Gilmore Girls.

* * *

 **February 2008**

"It's really good to see you," Logan tells Hugo Grace, as the maître d' leads them to their table. "I'm so glad you called."

"Come on. I couldn't come to San Francisco and not get in touch with you," Hugo responds.

They take their seats as a waiter comes by with water and gets their drink order.

"So what are you in town for anyway?" Logan asks.

"Wine," Hugo laughs as the waiter brings a bottle to the table for him to taste. He swirls it around and sips it heartily. "This works," he tells the waiter. "I'm technically here to check in on some of my writers, but the wine is the real draw."

"Yeah, I have never been that into wine before, but since I've lived here, it seems like every meeting or dinner or… man, even every lunch I go to has a wine pairing." He also takes a large sip. "I haven't been able to master the circling, sniffing, small-sipping thing yet, but I'm working on it."

"I think the key is to look as pretentious as possible," Hugo says with a smile.

"Absolutely. Years of prep school should make that easy for me." They both laugh, and Logan continues "You know after you called, I checked out your website. I've been so busy I haven't been able to check it as often as I'd like, but compared to where you started, it seems like your content and ad space is really growing," Logan says.

"Yes, I'm happy with our growth," Hugo says. "We're still small, but I have just managed to poach a few writers from Slate. We're hoping they'll bring some of their audience with them."

"That's great."

"I wanna hear all about what your new company. Mitchum tells me you're doing really well," Hugo says.

Logan almost chokes on his wine. "Mitchum said that? How would he even know? I've only talked to him twice since I left HPG."

"Well, he's kept up with what you're doing," Hugo informs him. "He was bragging about you the last time I talked to him."

"You have got to be kidding me." Logan shakes his head in disbelief.

"Nope. You are the apple of his eye, young Padawan. So fill me in. Tell me what you're doing," Hugo says.

"Sure. So basically, we help small businesses maximize their websites and expand their online presence. We get their site up and running and do the monthly maintenance on it. A lot of doctors, dentists. People who need a good website, but don't know how to do it. Long term, we want to expand into bigger companies, but we're growing really well," Logan explains proudly. "We have fifteen staff now."

"And what's your role?" Hugo asks.

Logan smiles. "I'm getting better with the IT, but mostly I'm the business end. I handle contracts and negotiations, and I'm the wine-r and dine-r."

"Yeah, I can see that working for you. You seem happy. You're enjoying it?"

"I am," Logan says. "I like the work, but honestly, the best part is not having to report back to my dad, you know?"

"I get that. And how have you adjusted to California? Totally different life than New York…" Hugo trails off as their server returns to take their order.

Once done ordering, Logan replies. "Truthfully, I just work so much. I mean I know it's not snowing here like I'm sure it is on the East Coast, but other than that, I don't know much difference. I haven't been able to take up surfing yet or anything. I have two partners who are really into biking, and they keep trying to get me to do it with them."

"I'm sure if you're in California long enough, this outdoorsy stuff will take hold," Hugo says. "I'm happy you're doing so well."

"Well, I couldn't play Peter Pan forever."

Dinner continues happily as they catch up and debate current affairs. Logan is having a great time until the dessert menus are placed in front of them.

He sighs internally. This has been tough since he and Rory split.

 _No matter how much we had eaten, she never thought a meal was complete without dessert. I still can't look at whipped cream or chocolate sauce without remembering times I licked them off her body._

 _Shit. And now I'm thinking about_ _ **dessert.**_

As if on cue, Hugo asks "Have you spoken to Rory lately?"

Logan looks at him sharply. "Um, no… Not for months. I guess you haven't heard, but um… we broke up before I moved out here."

"I had heard, actually. I just didn't know if… Did you know she's been writing for me?" Hugo asks.

"No, I didn't know that." Logan is unsure of what else to say.

"I've got her in the press pool for the Obama campaign," Hugo continues. "The California primary is in two weeks, and there's a rally in San Francisco tomorrow."

"O-kay." _What am I supposed to do with that?_

"I thought maybe you might want to go and see her. I saw her yesterday, and I get the feeling she wants to see you," Hugo says.

"No offense, Hugo… but she is the one who ended it, and my number hasn't changed. If she wanted to see me, she could," Logan says.

 _This fact haunts me every day._

"Oh. I was under the impression that you were the one….I'm sorry. Not my business. I shouldn't have said anything," Hugo responds.

"That's okay," Logan says, but the damage is done. The conversation is stilted and awkward from there until they agree to skip dessert. They say goodbye and promise to keep in touch.

Once alone back in his house, Logan pours himself a scotch and sits down to sip it slowly.

After that last disastrous phone call, Logan had sanctioned himself to five minutes of Rory-related thoughts a day. He had been so busy lately, the emotions were finally fading. Some days, he didn't think of her at all.

 _Well, that's out the window tonight._

He replays his conversation with Hugo.

" _I was under the impression that you were the one…" Did Rory tell him that I left her? Because she said no._

 _Fuck me. Is this a repeat of the great 'we were on a break' debacle of 2005? Could I still be that big of a dumbass?_

He grabs his laptop and googles her. He can't believe he has made it this long without doing it.

Several political articles come up, and he begins to read in earnest. He can hear her voice in her writing; it's so distinctly _her._ He allows himself to immerse in it, and the pain comes back as if it had never left.

The articles are timely and well thought-out. _She's a success._

 _This is what she chose over me. This is her wide-open future._

 _She might not have done this if she had said yes._

 _Fuck._

 _She may have been right._

He has already drank from the cup, so he decides to fall down the rabbit hole. He makes a phone call.

"Hugo?"

"Logan. Hey. Did you forget something?"

"No. I just… I can't stop thinking about what you said… about Rory," Logan says.

"I'm sorry again. I really shouldn't have interfered," Hugo says.

"No, it's okay. I just… Does she think that I… That _I_ wanted to be apart? I mean, I know I was technically the first to walk, but she said no… I asked her to _marry_ me, and she said no." There is a moment of silence, and Logan is mortified at his admission. "I'm sorry," he continues. "I know this is not professional."

"Come on, Logan. I've known you a long time, and we're not just colleagues. We're friends too. I really shouldn't have put myself in the middle of this. It's just that… Rory is not the same girl you introduced me to. She's still a gifted writer, but there's no joy in her work anymore. I don't think she's happy. I only told you about the rally because it may help you both. At least you can talk it out. See where you stand."

 _I want that. I want her. Dammit._

He sighs. "Where is it?"

* * *

The next day, Logan drives into town for the rally with a stomach full of butterflies. He has spent all night fantasizing different scenarios, and he has decided he has to take this chance. He has to see if there is any possibility of reconciliation.

 _Maybe by tonight, we'll be back together, and I can quit pretending to be happy._

The auditorium is packed. People and signs are everywhere, the chants of "Yes, we can" ringing through the air. The energy is infectious, and Logan allows himself a few minutes to be swept away.

 _I wonder if this has swayed Ace at all. If he can convince Hilary Clinton's biggest fan, he might just be able to take this thing._

 _Focus. How am I going to find her in here?_

 _Maybe this is a stupid idea. Maybe I should go._

 _But I'm here now, and I have to know. If there is any possibility that she might still want me._

As Senator Obama takes the stage, the crowd settles its movements, and he can finally get a view of the crowd. He spots what he believes to be the press pool on the opposite side of the stage from him.

 _There are cameras, and they're wearing suits. That has to be them…_

 _Rory is somewhere in those people._

His heart rate soars.

He tries to move as inconspicuously as possible, but he is getting a lot of looks. He finally stops moving and listens, though he really doesn't hear a thing. Soon it is over, and the crowd starts cheering wildly. Logan makes his move.

 _I have to do this now. I might not have another chance. Hugo wouldn't have told me to do this if he didn't think it would end well for me._

He is about one hundred yards from the press pool when he spots her. He slows to a shuffle, enjoying the sight of her after so long.

She is wearing a navy suit with her hair pulled back behind her ears. Even from this distance, he can see her pale skin and the bags under her eyes.

 _Hugo's right. She doesn't look happy. That shouldn't bring me so much joy, but it does._

He continues moving toward her. As he gets closer, Rory looks up and catches his eye. The bright blue stops him in his tracks. From here, he can see that she is wearing the earrings he gave her last Christmas.

 _That has to mean something, right?... Oh my God, I'm going to get her back._

A smile starts spreading over his face involuntarily. His feet begin working again, and he has to concentrate on not running. Then he sees her start to shake her head, giving him reason to slow down again.

 _What? Is this not a good time? I know she's working, but it's been months…_

She looks down, rubs her eyes, then looks back at him again. He is suddenly rooted to his spot.

With a sigh, she turns on her heel and follows the group of reporters as they move in a pack away from the stage.

 _What… Where is she… I don't understand…_

He can only watch her walk away. He has a fleeting thought to chase after her, but he quickly dismisses it.

 _I have some fucking pride, and I can only let her make a fool of me so many times._

 _She said no. She had reasons. Quit being so goddamn weak, and move on._

He stands there for a long time while the crowds move around him.

Finally, with a heavy heart, he treks back to his car. He calls Julie's friend, Kelly. They've been out a few times, and though he knows it's not really going anywhere, he needs a distraction. She invites him over, and he heads there with a solitary to goal- to fuck someone else until Rory Gilmore's eyes stop torturing him.

* * *

 **April 2008**

He waits in front of the baggage claim with Josh and Honor as the carousel starts moving. Honor has her arms wrapped around his waist, like she can't get close enough.

"Honor," he laughs. "You're squeezing all the air out of me."

"I can't help it. I've missed you so much. It's been too long since we've seen you," Honor says.

Logan deflects. "I know. My work is crazy here."

"These two," Josh says pointing, then reaching for a suitcase. Logan grabs the other one, and they head for the parking lot to his car.

"Okay. You guys need food? You want to go home? What?" Logan asks them.

"I want to see your house," Honor says, climbing in the back seat. "I won't believe you have a yard until I see it."

"It's true. I actually mow the lawn myself," he says.

"How did you learn to do that?" Honor asks.

"Youtube."

"I can't believe this is your car," Josh laughs from the passenger side once they are on the expressway.

"Me either. But a used Altima is what fits into my budget these days," Logan says.

"Logan," Honor starts. "You know if you need money-"

"I'm good. I promise. It's just… my life now," Logan says.

Fifteen minutes later, Logan pulls up in front of his home. "I know it's different from city life," he begins.

"No, it's adorable," Honor squeals getting out of the car. She follows him up the steps to the front door. "I'm really proud of you." But upon entering the house, her brow furrows. "You have no furniture."

Josh laughs again. "He has a couch and a huge TV. What else does he need?"

"Yeah, you can tell a man lives here alone," Honor says.

Logan nods with a tight smile.

"I'm sorry," she stammers. "I didn't mean-"

"It's fine. I mean, it's true. A man does live here alone," Logan responds.

"Well… are you seeing anyone?" she asks.

 _That didn't take long._

"Babe," Josh says. "Leave him alone."

"Wouldn't be my sister if she weren't prying into my personal life. And… yes, I am… here and there, but nobody you'll be meeting this week," Logan says, giving Honor his sternest look.

"Okay, fine. I was just asking."

* * *

He wakes up early the next morning to find Honor at the kitchen table with a mug of coffee.

"You're up early," he says.

"East Coast time. What's your excuse?" she asks.

"This is what I do now. I'm a boring adult," Logan tells her.

She gives him a tight smile. "Can we talk? Before Josh wakes up?"

"Sure. What's up?"

"First, thanks for letting us come. I wanted to be with you on your birthday, and-"

"You wanted to hit Napa!" Logan laughs.

She doesn't laugh with him. "Why did you cut me out?" she asks bluntly, her tone markedly different than a moment before.

"What?"

"I know why you cut Mom and Dad out, and I understand why you had to move, but I don't know what I did to cause you to freeze me out too. It's always been _you_ and _me_ , and you just left without a word," she says.

"Come on, Honor. I have not-"

"When is the last time you called me? Or made any time for me? You didn't come home for Thanksgiving or Christmas, and I had to badger you into letting me come this weekend."

Logan is quiet for a moment, pondering her words.

"I'm sorry. You're right. I just… After everything with Dad and then everything with Rory, I just had to leave. I couldn't have the same life I had before. I had to completely start over just to survive," he admits.

"So you let go of Colin and Finn too?" she asks, although he can tell from her tone that she knows the answer.

 _Obviously I didn't. Why was Honor different?_

He reflects for a few moments.

"I knew you'd make me talk about Rory. I'm _still_ not ready to talk about it. I knew you'd want to analyze everything and figure out exactly what went wrong, when the truth is pretty simple. She didn't love me enough to marry me. And that's hard to admit," he says.

"Oh, Logan. I don't care about her or why you're not together. I only care about you and your happiness. I'm fine to never talk about her again, unless you tell me otherwise. Okay?" She looks to him for acknowledgement. "Just don't shut me out anymore."

He smiles at her. "Okay."

"Will you think about coming home for Christmas?" Honor asks.

"I don't know," he says. "I've been pretty happy without Mitchum and Shira in my life."

"Yes, I'm sure. But your new niece or nephew is going to be so excited to meet their Uncle Logan," she says, smiling.

"Wha-at?"

"I'm due in November," she tells him with a big smile.

"Congratulations," Logan says, hugging her tightly. "This is not going to be a good vineyard tour for you, huh?"

"You know I didn't _actually_ come for the wine, Little Brother."

* * *

 **December 2008**

Logan passes through the gate in his rental car and peers up at the house.

 _It looks exactly the same._

He parks and grabs his bags. He walks through the front door for the first time in almost two years, leaving his suitcase in the vast foyer and heading toward the lights and sounds of Christmas music.

His family are all seated in the keeping room, drinking in front of the Christmas tree, and intently watching the baby sleep in a swing. Mitchum is the first to look up and spot him in the entryway.

"Logan."

They all look back at him, but before he can say anything, his mother has rushed around to him. She gives him a genuine hug and whispers in his ear "We're so glad you've come."

 _What is this? No fake air kisses? No snide remarks about not calling first?_

"I wanted to meet the newest member of the family, and I… I missed you guys," he says, throwing her a bone.

 _It's Christmas, and I should… It's almost… no… it can't be true…_

 _Damn, have I actually missed them?_

* * *

A/N: I can't update here again until I finish London, Baby. Something happens in 2009 that won't make sense if I don't make it happen in 2006 first! But only two chapters left there so bear with me.


	3. 2009

**Author Note:** Sorry for the long delay, but London, Baby is finally finished, and I can get back to this. Logan's inner thoughts in italics. All characters belong to Gilmore Girls

* * *

 **JANUARY 2009**

"Hey. I'm looking for a Dr. Jansen. Has she checked in yet?" Logan asks the host at Nola.

"Oh, that's me!"

Logan turns around to find a young woman standing behind him. She is a little taller than him with chin length blond hair and brown eyes.

 _Wow._

"You must be Logan," she says, reaching to shake his hand.

"Yes," he sputters out. "You must be Dr. Jansen."

"Oh, call me Lauren," she says. "Let's sit."

He gives her his most charming grin. "After you."

Logan follows her to a table close to the bar, checking her out the entire way.

 _She's curvier than I normally go for, but damn..._

 _Pull it together. She's a potential client, not a potential hook-up._

They sit down, and Logan tries to remember his spiel. His attraction has thrown him off, and it takes him a moment to settle down and get to his starting spot.

"Hmmm," he clears his throat. "So tell me about your practice and your current website, just so I can see if there are ways in which we can help you."

"Okay, so I just bought the practice from a much older doctor, and he doesn't even have a website. He's been there a long time so he's established a reputation, but I need a website, obviously. I need to attract younger patients."

"Absolutely. This is a common problem in practice transition. So it's something we can easily help you with," he tells her. He runs her through the gamut of their services, pausing when she asks questions.

She's smart and funny, and he can't help but flirt a little.

"Honestly, you won't need much. A good headshot is going to attract people. You're… pretty," he finishes lamely.

A throaty laugh escapes her. "Thank you," she says. "But I also want it to include something about the kind of dentistry I practice."

"Well of course," he agrees. "Just… being pretty is not going to hurt."

 _Reign it in, Huntzberger._

But he can't, and the rest of the meal loses focus from business to personal as they flirt their way through it.

"So let me leave you with my card, and you can call me with any questions you may have," he tells her on their way out, trying to pull the meeting back to the contract he needs signed.

"Thanks. I'll… call you," Lauren agrees.

When he gets back to the office, he heads straight into John's office.

"Hey! How'd it go?" John asks him.

"I think really well," Logan responds. "I'll follow up with her in a couple of days. But… Is there any policy about dating clients?"

"Why?" John asks.

"She's… I liked her. I want to see her again."

"Logan. Be careful. We really need the business. With the economy tanking… I just really want this contract. And it's not like you have a problem getting dates. Does it have to be _this_ woman?"

"No, you're right," Logan says. "I won't. I just found her _really_ attractive. But… we have to get this business. I'll behave."

Logan feels his cell phone buzz in his pocket. "Logan Huntzberger."

"Hey. It's Lauren… Jansen… from lunch."

"Of course. Hey. Did you have other questions for me?" Logan asks her.

"No, um… I was wondering if you wanted to meet for a drink after work tonight."

"Uh, sure," he says. "I'll call you when I'm done today. Sound good?"

"Perfect."

Logan hangs up the phone and looks at John. "That was Lauren. Dr. Jansen. She wants to have a drink after work. But I'll take the contracts. Keep it professional."

John rolls his eyes. "Fine. Date her. But we need this contract, man. Don't blow this."

Logan smiles. _I can't wait to see her again._

* * *

 **APRIL 2009**

"So if things continue trending in the manner they did in the first quarter, we are going to have to start looking at some layoffs," Gene tells them.

Logan leans back and sighs, glaring at their accountant.

"How short are you projecting us to be for the year?" Kevin asks.

"Roughly sixty to seventy thousand," Gene answers. "Which is two to three of your auxiliary staff."

"Shit," John mutters. "And you don't think there's any other way around this? I mean, the economy won't be rebounding any time soon, will it?"

"No, this looks like it is going to be really bad."

"Three people is a lot. Can we trim our salaries some?" Logan asks. "Well, I mean, I can trim mine. You guys have kids and babies on the way."

"I can cut back a little," John says, turning to their accountant. "Can you figure up a couple of different scenarios, and we'll choose the best one?"

"Absolutely. I'll have those for you by the end of the week," he replies getting up to leave.

The three partners are silent for a few moments as they absorb the tough news.

"We could probably all share an assistant," Kevin finally says. "Or maybe if we keep all of them and let one IT consultant go? Whoever we hired last…"

"Let me talk this through with Julie too before I commit us to a pay cut," John says.

Kevin agrees. "Let's take the rest of the day to figure out what each of us can do personally so that when Gene comes back here with options, we'll be ready."

Logan heads home, deep in thought.

 _I know where I can come up with sixty thousand dollars that I could reinvest into the company. But am I ready to do that?_

He walks into his home, throwing his things down on his bed and heading to his dresser. With a deep sigh, he opens his sock drawer and reaches all the way to the back until his hand is around two small velvet boxes.

He sits back down on the bed and slowly opens them. The engagement ring taunts him first.

 _It's been two years. She's not coming back to me. That's just a fantasy in my head. There is no logical reason to continue to hold onto this._

He doesn't bother to open the sapphire.

Instead, he takes his thoughts out onto the road, as he bikes his way toward the bay. Once there, he slips off his shoes and wanders out into the sand.

 _I've got Lauren, and she's… she's great. She is. So it's not like what I had with Rory. I have got to get it through my head that I will probably never have anything like that again._

The water rushes up to his feet, and he feels the pull of the tide against his legs.

 _But what if she finally grows up and realizes that she won't have anything like that either? That no one could ever love her as much as I did… What if she knocks on my door and I've sold her engagement ring? Would she be disappointed I gave up on her?_

 _Or realize how pathetic I am for keeping it all this time?_

He continues walking down the beach lost in thought. Eventually the sun begins to set, and he bikes back home.

Lauren calls as he's putting dinner together, but he quickly declines the call.

 _I can't talk to her right now. Not while I'm back in the throes of Rory's rejection. I've never even_ _ **told**_ _her about Rory._

Instead, he calls someone else.

"Mate! Long time since I've heard from you, Mr. Workaholic!" Finn greets him.

"I know. I'm sorry. It's… tough right now, with the economy. You're probably not aware, but things really suck at the moment," Logan says with a laugh.

"I'll have you know that I am not that out of touch. Daddy Dearest sold the jet, and I've been flying… _commercial_ ," Finn replies.

"Wow. I don't know how you're surviving."

"So, how have you been doing? Still seeing that same girl? The hot dentist?" Finn asks him.

"Yeah, Lauren. I'm still seeing her. She's fine. But… actually… I feel ridiculous even asking this… But I know you talk to her, and… is she happy?"

Finn doesn't say anything, so Logan continues.

"Does she still think she made the right decision? Saying no, I mean."

Finn is still quiet. Finally he responds. "What's going on? Why are you thinking about her again?"

 _Because I am such a glutton for misery. Because I'm always thinking about Rory. This is just the first time in a while I've asked you about her._

"Never mind. It's stupid. When can you come out here and visit?" Logan asks, desperate to change the subject.

"Any time, brother. Name a good weekend for you, and I'll be there," Finn says.

"Great. Let me check my calendar and get back with you. I gotta go now though."

"Okay. And Logan… I haven't talked to her in a while, and she never talks to me about you. But I _don't_ think she's all that happy," Finn says just before he hangs up.

 _Fuck. Now I'm more confused than ever. This is ridiculous._

He abandons his dinner and drives over to Lauren's duplex. When she opens the door, he smirks at her before grabbing her by the hands and pulling her in for a passionate kiss.

She laughs and drags him into the house.

Later that night, he looks over at Lauren's sleeping form. _She's smart. And funny. And hot as hell._

 _I'm selling those rings._

* * *

That weekend, Logan calls Kevin's wife Aimee to get her opinion about the best jeweler in the Bay area. ("Oh, my God, are you going to propose?") After quickly getting her off the phone, Logan heads out with the two rings, determined to put the past behind him.

He walks in and explains to the owner that he has two rings he wants to have appraised and sold.

"This is gorgeous," she marvels as she looks at the engagement ring. "Why are you selling it?"

Logan swallows hard before beginning. "It's a family ring, and I don't really have any need for it."

"Not the marrying type?" she asks rhetorically as she pulls out a monoscope to evaluate the ring. "Perfect clarity, flawless. I would need to let my appraiser give you an exact number, but I would guess it's worth about sixty thousand."

"I bought it for sixty-seven two years ago," he says without thinking.

She looks up at him quizzically.

 _Fine. I bought it. She rejected it. She said no. She had reasons._

She notices his obvious blush and moves onto the next box. "Okay. What's in here?"

She opens the sapphire, and the color hits him like a punch to the gut. _I haven't looked at this in so long. It's like she's staring right at me._

"Exquisite. Again, I would need to show it to my appraiser, but I would guess around eight thousand." She looks up at him for confirmation.

 _I am so lame. I'm so lame that this poor lady is trying desperately not to show how much she pities me._

"That's about right," he agrees. "When will your appraiser be in?"

"Later today. Let me have you sign some paperwork, and then you can leave them with me."

Logan looks back at the rings one final time before turning to leave the store. He doesn't feel the closure he had hoped he would. His hand is on the knob when he turns around.

"I can't sell the sapphire," he tells the woman. She nods and hands it back to him with a small smile.

 _I don't want to forget the color of her eyes._

* * *

 **August 2009**

Logan, John, and Kevin are sitting in John's office during lunch pouring over lease agreements. "These office spaces all cost significantly less than what we pay here. We can work out of any of these. The square footage is just going to be tight," Kevin says.

"Well, once we slash the staff, that won't be so much of a problem," Logan answers back sarcastically.

Kevin finally asks the toughest question. "Should we keep downsizing? Or should we just cash out now? I don't want to be the downer here, but are we just putting off the inevitable?"

" _No_. We just have to weather the storm," Logan says emphatically. "It's gonna be tight for a while, maybe even years, but we can't just give up."

"I'm not trying to patronize you, Logan, but we have families and people who depend on us," Kevin says.

Logan doesn't have a response for this. _They're right. They have other things to worry about. I have nothing but this job._

"Let's table this for now guys," John says. "We'll keep looking at these. But I'm with Logan on this, Kevin. I'm not ready to throw in the towel yet. Now, we are all booked with the same client this afternoon. Do either of you know this…" He pauses to look at their schedule. "Michael Hunt?"

Logan and Kevin both shake their heads, so John continues. "I'm not sure why he needed all three of us, but he must be serious, and we obviously need all the business we can get. So let's get this done. Okay?"

They sit silently for a few moments. Internally, Logan is freaking out.

 _Unfortunately, I remember this feeling too well. I do not want to fail again. I've got to figure out a way to make this work. But I_ _ **don't**_ _have another sixty thousand dollars lying around._

John's assistant comes in to let them know that their 2:00 is waiting for them in the conference room, finally breaking the silence.

 _Pull it together._ _ **You**_ _are the seller._ _ **You**_ _are the one who brings them in. Michael Hunt is not going to know what hit him._

They head out of John's office. Logan follows his partners down the hall, pumping himself up the whole way. But upon entering the conference room, he hears a familiar voice greeting John and Kevin.

 _What the fuck? Are you kidding me?_

Logan enters the room to stand face to face with his father. "What are you doing here, Dad? Are you 'Michael Hunt?'"

"Son… Good to see you. I knew you wouldn't want to take a meeting with me, so I changed my name up a bit. Old trick from my days covering politics."

"Okay. But again, what are you doing here?" Logan asks again.

"Yeah, what's going on?" Kevin asks, as John says "This is your father?"

"Yes. Mitchum Huntzberger. I have a proposal for the three of you. Let's sit," Mitchum says.

The three men shoot eyes at each other as they cautiously sit down around the conference table.

"I'm going to start with an assumption," Mitchum says. "Now stop me if I'm wrong, but I imagine that the crumbling economy is really hurting your business here. People are going to find cheaper ways to get a website running, and that leaves you three either having to slash costs or lose business. And let's face it. You can't work as cheap as someone in India can."

 _Sometimes I hate him so much._

Logan glances at John and Kevin who are sitting ramrod straight in their chairs.

"I'm going to take your silence as confirmation," Mitchum continues. "Now Huntzberger Publishing is willing to offer you three million dollars for acquisition rights. We'll let you keep your existing clients, but we'll shift your focus to websites for other HPG clients. Authors, print media, publishing houses, basically whoever I tell you."

He laughs that smug laugh that makes Logan want to scream.

 _How dare he come in here to_ _ **my**_ _place of business and act like he already owns it._

"This is a surprise. We weren't expecting this today, so we'll need some time to think, and a written offer for our lawyers to look over," John says.

"What's the catch?" Logan asks.

Kevin and John both look at him, eyebrows raised.

"Mitchum Huntzberger never does anything out of the goodness of his heart. What's in it for you, Dad?" Logan asks again.

"One caveat," Mitchum admits.

 _I knew it._

"Logan will be moving back to New York to work."

 _Of course._

"Wait," Kevin says. "Logan is a partner here. He isn't just _moving_ to New York."

"Well, that part is non-negotiable. If you want this deal, you give up Logan. Your choice. I'll be in town for two more days, so that's the timetable," Mitchum says, dropping his card on the table.

With a smirk, he departs the conference room, taking all of Logan's air with him.

After a couple of measured breaths, Logan chases his father out of the room.

"Why are you doing this?" he asks as he catches Mitchum in front of the elevator.

"You know why, son. You are meant to work at HPG. I've let this frivolity go on for a couple of years, but the time for games is over."

"Dad, I have a life here. I love this job, and I'm seeing someone," Logan pleads.

"Logan, it's your choice. You can go in there and tell your partners that you are willing to give up three million dollars in the biggest economic crisis since the Great Depression. See what they say. I'm sure they will care about your girlfriend," Mitchum taunts.

"How does HPG even have money like this to throw away right now? Print media is dying, and the economy can't be doing you any favors either. You know we're not worth three million dollars," Logan counters.

Mitchum glances away so quickly that Logan almost doesn't catch the drop in façade.

"We're doing fine," Mitchum says.

Logan just continues to glare at him. The elevator dings and the doors open. Mitchum steps in, then looks back at Logan and holds the door open.

"It's not HPG money. It's ours. Your mother wants you to come home." He removes his hand and lets the doors close around him.

 _Shit. How is he still controlling me like this? Like some plea from Mom means jack shit to me._

Logan trudges back to the conference room; John and Kevin stand when he walks in.

"What the fuck was that?" Kevin says. "You said your family dynamic was weird, but that was on another level."

"But we've decided that we're not doing it," John says quickly. "You've been with us since the get-go, and we need you here. We're computer nerds. _We_ can't sell contracts. Or do the business. We need you for that."

"You won't need to sell anything. They'll all come from HPG. You won't need me anymore. You have to take this money. It's a no-brainer," Logan says. "Besides you could find another pretty face if you needed to."

"Come on, man. You know that's not what I meant."

"I know," Logan says quietly.

"We're not doing it," Kevin reiterates.

"Yes, we are. You were right before. You have families to think about."

"What about you? What about Lauren?" John asks. "What about all that money you just put back in to bail us out?"

 _I don't know. But I've worked so hard to be a better person the last few years. I can't go back to being a selfish asshole now._

 _And I needed to sell that ring anyway._

"I'm gonna go," Logan says as he walks out of the conference room. "I'll call him and tell him."

"Logan…" he hears Kevin say as he heads toward his office. He quickly gathers his things and takes off. He drives straight to Lauren's. She's not home, so he sits on her stoop to wait.

He ignores calls from John and Kevin.

His thoughts are moving a mile a minute.

 _I'm going to have to do this. I don't want to give in, but I can't take John and Kevin down with me. They have wives and babies, and we are really struggling right now._

 _I guess it will be nice to stop worrying about money. But I just don't want to answer to him again. I'm going to be right back under his thumb. Fuck._

 _I_ _ **like**_ _never talking to Grandpa. I was kind of hoping I wouldn't see him again until his funeral. Am I going to be expected to show up at the house in Hartford now?_

 _What am I going to do about Lauren? My house? After everything, I love that house. And I certainly won't be able to keep training for a triathalon in New York._

 _Palo Alto is home now. I like the outdoors and the sunshine._

 _And I don't want to be that geographically close to Rory. I'll get weak again, just when I am finally starting to do better._

 _I guess there's some upside. Colin and Stephanie will be glad I'm home. And Honor will be over the moon. I'll get to see Aiden a lot more._

 _Ugh. It's like Sophie's choice, except- Oh she's home._

Lauren parks her car and greets him at the door. "Hey. Is everything okay? What are you doing here?"

He reaches for her, placing his hand on the back of her head to pull her close. "I've had a really shitty day," he whispers in her ear.

"Okay. Let's go inside, and you can tell me all about it."

She unlocks her door, takes him by the hand, and leads him in.

"I don't wanna talk right now," he says, kissing her deeply. "Will you just… be here with me?"

"Of course."

They eat take out and take a shower together, carefully tiptoeing around their thoughts. They are lying in her bed wrapped up in towels when she finally asks him about his day.

"Logan, I'm not trying to pry, but you're scaring me. Is everything okay?"

 _I'm going to just have to tell her._

"No," he says. "It's not okay… I'm going to have to move to New York. Probably soon."

She sits up and looks at him. "What? Why?"

He fills her in on his father's visit and the ultimatum laid out.

"So, don't do it," she says defiantly. "If John and Kevin don't want you to, just don't."

"It's not that simple. We are not doing well. Before my father came in today, Kevin was saying he thought we should liquidate and get out. I just can't justify taking this opportunity from them."

Tears fill her eyes. "So that's it? Your daddy throws some money at you, and you just… cave?"

"Look Lauren. That's completely unfair. You don't know anything about my relationship with my Dad," he says.

"So make me understand then."

"I have an eighteen million dollar trust fund that's been frozen for the last two years because I'm not working for him. This is not about money at all. I'm trying to do the right thing," Logan explains.

Her mouth drops open. "Eighteen _million_ dollars? Woah… You are… really fucking rich."

He just looks at her. _I've never wanted her to know any of this stuff about me. I want her just to know the guy here in front of her._

"So, if you go to New York… what happens to us? I love you, Logan. I don't want you to go," she pleads.

 _I don't know if I love her. But I think that's more about me than her. I don't know if I am ever going to let myself really love someone ever again. I probably love her as much as I can._

She takes his silence as referendum.

"Oh… You don't… Oh. Wow," she stutters.

 _Shit. Now I've hurt her._

"Lauren, I don't want to go either. I don't want to break up," he says, doing his best to assuage her.

"Why not? I can't leave Palo Alto. I have an eight hundred thousand dollar loan on the practice. I guess that's nothing to you, but… I can't practice in New York anyway. They have a completely different licensing board. And it doesn't sound like you'll be allowed to come back here. And if you don't love me, then why would we even go through all of that? I'm thirty-two years old. I'm not just _having fun_ anymore," she says.

"Hey. It's not that... I mean... I'm crazy about you," he admits. "You know that, right?"

 _Why is it always so hard for me to say it?_

 _Well, once I realized, it wasn't hard with_ _ **her**_ _. Why can't I do it now?_

"All of that other stuff may be true, but I still don't want to break up. We can do the distance," he continues.

 _It's gonna suck, but I know I'm capable of staying committed even across thousands of miles._

She doesn't say anything. She just lays back down, rolls away from him, and turns off her lamp.

 _Shit. Shit, shit, shit._

After an uneasy night of sleep, he awakens the next morning when Lauren slips on top of him. She interlocks their fingers and moves her body on his until he is fully awake. He rolls her over and looks deep in her eyes as he enters her.

It's slow and sensual, and he can't unlock his eyes from hers. _I have to know what she's thinking, what she's feeling._

He lets himself be swept away by the feeling of her.

 _I'm an idiot. I do love her, and I'm not going to leave her. This is the closest I've been since Rory, and I can't let her go._

When they're done, she slips out of bed and starts getting dressed. He watches her silently, a slight awkwardness taking over.

She eventually sits on the edge of the bed, putting her earrings on, and says "I think we should admit what's happening here. This is not some small snafu in our relationship. This is a break up. You're leaving, and I can't sit around waiting for you to figure this out."

"What?" he asks, sitting up. "Then what was that just now?"

"It was goodbye… It's the right decision, Logan. You know it, and I know it."

"Lauren-"

"I have to go," she says, her voice breaking.

She leans down to kiss his lips, struggling against him when he tries to pull her closer. "Logan, don't…"

He lets her go, hating himself, hating the situation, and hating his father most of all.

Logan lies in her bed feeling sorry for himself for a while. Eventually he grabs his phone and calls Mitchum.

"You win," he says glumly before hanging up on him.

* * *

A/N: The rings are from the last chapter of London, Baby so if this is confusing, you may want to check that out. Up next: 2010- Logan is back on the East Coast!


	4. 2010

Author Note: Thank you so much to everyone who is reading and reviewing! I try and respond to all of you, but sometimes I get behind. And a reminder that if you don't come off anon, I can't reply back.

These are the events in 2010 that shape the Logan we see in AYITL. As always, Logan's inner thoughts are in italics.

I do not own Gilmore Girls or any characters.

* * *

 **February 2010**

"Mr. Huntzberger, there's someone down here to see you. He's a little hysterical. The ID says 'Colin McCrae.' Do you know him or should we call security?" the doorman asks Logan over the phone.

"No, I know him. You can let him up," Logan says.

Six minutes later, he opens the door to a disheveled Colin, wildly running his hand through his hair.

"What the hell is going on? Are you okay?" Logan asks.

"No. I did something really stupid," Colin says.

"What?"

"I slept with Jillian," Colin spills.

" _What_?" Logan asks again.

"My secretary. I slept with her," Colin admits.

"Why? What about Stephanie?" Logan asks.

"She told me she wanted to take a break, and I got wasted and screwed Jillian... I can't go home and face Steph. I can't go to work and see Jillian. I'm losing it, Logan."

"Okay, calm down… Why did Stephanie break up with you?" Logan asks.

"She's been upset that I've been working too much, and she says I'm not making her a priority… But what am I supposed to do? My dad expects me to bill at least seventy-five hours a week… I fucking hate it, and she knows it. Monday when I came home she said she wasn't happy and she wanted some space."

Logan's mind is instantly thrown back five years when Rory told him the exact same thing.

" _I'm not happy Logan… I just need some space…"_

Logan has to ask. "Did she actually say she wanted to break up, or-"

"No, I asked," Colin interrupts him. "I remember what happened with Rory. I begged her to change her mind, and she said no. So I went back to the office, and I've been sleeping there. But now I can't even do that… because I'm a weak slut… and how am I ever going to get her back now?"

"You can stay here. Don't worry about that. But I'm guessing Steph has no clue about the anniversary trip to Costa Rica," Logan says.

"I really wanted to surprise her, but… that's all fucked now," Colin says. He finally stops pacing and sits on the couch. "What am I going to do?"

"You want to stay with her right?" Logan asks.

"Yes, of course. But I don't know how to do what you did. I don't know how to tell my dad to fuck off. Maybe I can't have both," Colin laments.

"Well if you had to choose, what would you choose?"

"Stephanie," Colin says instantly.

"Okay, then make it happen. Just do it. Tell her you want to make this work and you'll do whatever you have to. And I know you don't want to hear this, but you also have to tell her about Jillian. I didn't do that, and it blew up in my face," Logan advises.

 _Walker telling Rory led to one of the worst weeks of my life._

"Hang out here tonight. But you gotta go home after work tomorrow. Just tell her, apologize, and beg for forgiveness."

* * *

Three days later, Logan stands in front of Colin and Stephanie's door. He raps sharply, waiting for her to let him in.

She opens the door, looking as devastated as Colin has the last week.

"If you're here to defend him-"

"I'm not. I'm here to check on you," Logan says. "Can I come in?"

She silently opens the door allowing him entry.

"How are you doing?" he asks quietly.

"Oh, just swell," she responds, her voice thick with sarcasm.

He studies her carefully. "You don't seem swell for someone who wanted this break up."

Stephanie looks away guiltily. "I didn't want to 'break-up' break-up. I just wanted him to know how serious I was about needing a change. I didn't think he would sleep with that whore within thirty-six hours. So go ahead and lecture me about playing games."

Logan doesn't; he waits patiently. _She needs to get this out._

"It's just… I thought once he finished school, it would get better. But it's been seven months, and it's gotten worse. We never see each other, and when we do he's always tired and cranky. We never have sex anymore- sorry, but we don't. He's probably been sleeping with her for a while, and that's why he's always at the office."

Logan pulls her towards him moving them to the couch as she begins crying. "Come on, Steph. You know that's not true."

"We had been talking about getting engaged when he graduated, but he hasn't even mentioned it in months. We've been together too long to be so… static. You know?" she continues.

"Can I say something?" Logan asks.

 _This probably isn't my place to say, but she's not speaking to Colin, so…_

When she nods, he continues. "He's not talking about getting engaged because he wanted to surprise you. He has a trip to Costa Rica booked for your anniversary. Same place we stayed when you guys got back together. He was going to propose down there."

"Are you serious?" she cries as she pulls back her head to look at him.

Logan nods. "I helped him pick out the ring."

"Oh, God… Well, it's too late now. He slept with her... I've always worried in the back of my mind, that Colin is destined to be just like his dad. Workaholic. Serial adulterer. Maybe this was just inevitable," Stephanie says.

She begins crying again. She lays down in his lap, resting her head on a pillow, and Logan tucks her hair behind her ear.

"I refuse to be like my mom," Stephanie continues. "Staying in a terrible relationship because it provides me with money and social standing. I'm better than that."

"You _are_ better than that," Logan agrees. "And I honestly don't think Colin wants that life either. Look, we all have shitty dads. And we've been groomed to be shitty husbands. But for the right woman, I know he would give all that up to be decent and honorable. No matter how tough he talks."

 _I would have given up anything for Rory. And I never would have strayed._

"Do you think I'm that woman for Colin?"

"I do. I've known him since I was thirteen. You are it for him," Logan says.

"But how can I ever trust him again now?" she asks.

"You gave me some really good advice a few years ago on that long flight to Costa Rica. Do you remember? You told me to give it time, and if it was meant to work out, it would."

"Yeah, well how did that work out for you, Logan?"

He winces. _Ouch._

"I'm sorry. I'm being a bitch," Stephanie says.

Logan breathes deep before continuing. "I may not have ended up with her, but I got a year and half after that trip, and I wouldn't trade that time for anything. Even knowing how it ended."

 _At least I learned what true happiness feels like. And that I was capable of obtaining it._

Logan rubs her forehead until she falls asleep. Eventually, he carries her to her bed and tucks her in.

Colin is back to pacing the floor when he returns to his own apartment.

"Did she talk to you? What did she say?"

"She's a mess. You've got to give her some time," Logan responds.

"Fuck. She's not going to forgive me, is she?"

"I don't know," Logan says truthfully.

"God. I'm such a dumbass. Maybe McCrae destiny is in the cards for me. Six wives. Working forever to pay alimony. It used to make me laugh, but now it seems like the worst life ever."

Logan sighs. _I've had all these thoughts._

"It's only your destiny if you choose it," he tells Colin.

"What about you? Are you going to choose it? I mean, you just let Lauren go when Mitchum made you move back," Colin says.

At first, Logan doesn't have an answer. _I_ ** _don't_** _want that life, but the universe seems to have other plans for me._

Finally he says "Yeah, but that was not… I really _wanted_ that to be something. Even though it wasn't. She was great, and after all these years, it turns out that I actually really like being in a relationship. But it's not like she was the one or anything. If I ever come across something real again, I _won't_ choose HPG. I just think I already missed my chance."

Colin is quiet for a few minutes before asking "Do you ever wish you were born poor? Give up all the money, the cars, the status. Just to be able to do what you want?"

 _All the time. Anytime I have to listen to Mitchum berate me. Anytime I sleep with some random girl that I know I never want to see again, but she knows who I am._

"Sometimes. Do you?" he answers.

"Never. I love being rich. I love everything that comes with money. But I've never had to give up anything like this before. I really envy Finn right now. He's loaded, but his family doesn't expect anything from him," Colin says.

 _But I don't know if Finn will ever experience the high of a professional score. Or know what's it like to love someone so much, it hurts._

"I'm sorry. I'm getting too fucking deep," Colin finally says. "I need to go to bed."

The days turn into weeks that turn into months, and Colin is still sleeping in his guest room.

* * *

 **June 2010**

Logan and Robert are running through Central Park as part of their half-marathon training. Since Colin has been staying with him, Robert has become a more permanent part of his life.

 _I still don't trust him, but he is good motivation. I want to beat him at everything, and that keeps me running._

They slow down at the Reservoir, their mileage done for the day. Logan is slightly out of breath as he walks to the bridge, cooling off and guzzling water out of his hip bottle. He looks out over the water, a sense of calm washing over him.

"Hey, is that Rory Gilmore?" Robert asks, walking up to him. "Up ahead?"

Logan quickly looks where Robert is pointing. About one hundred yards away, two women are walking, one with long brown hair, and one with shorter blond hair.

 _The hair seems too long, but it looks like her body. Oh my God. Maybe it is her…_

Robert is waiting for an answer, so Logan plays it as cool as he can. "Well, you would know what she looks like from the back more than anyone."

"Ha, ha. Maybe it's not," Robert answers. "Whatever. They look cute from behind. Want to go over there and see if the front's any good?"

 _Ugh. He can be so sleazy._

The blond turns her head to the side, and Logan is shocked to determine it's Paris Gellar.

 _Holy shit. That's got to be her._

 _I've been waiting for this moment forever. I have an entire conversation planned. But in my fantasy, I'm usually not dripping with sweat. I look good, and I smell better._

 _And in my mind, she's not with Paris. Paris_ _hates me. That is not how I want our first conversation to go._

"No, I'm too gross to hit on girls right now," he says. "I'm gonna take off. I'll catch up with you later."

Despite the protest from his exhausted legs, Logan takes off in the opposite direction.

 _That had to be her. There's no way Paris has other friends. I wonder if she lives here now… or if she's just visiting. I wonder if she would want to talk to me after all this time._

 _I wonder what she would think if she knew I was back at HPG. That I folded._

He gets back to his apartment, ignoring Colin on his way to the shower. He hops in and out, unable to control the anxiety that is creeping in.

Scrolling through his phone contacts, he stops at her name.

 _Maybe there's a reason I've never deleted this._

But he stops himself from calling her.

 _I can't fall back into this._

Instead he calls a different girl in his phone, making a date for that night. He takes her home afterward, but all he can think about is Rory Gilmore.

* * *

 **July 2010**

Colin bursts in the door on a Saturday morning carrying two coffees. "You will never believe who I just saw in Starbucks!" he says, handing a coffee to Logan.

"Who?"

"Rory Gilmore. She was in the line ahead of me."

Logan is surprised. He had convinced himself in the intervening weeks, that it had not actually been Rory in Central Park.

"Did you talk to her?" he asks tentatively.

"No. Why would I talk to her after what she did to you?" Colin responds.

Logan smiles at Colin's fidelity.

"It's okay. Finn talks to her."

"Well, Finn is a disloyal son of a bitch," Colin says, smiling.

"Do you want me to stop talking to Stephanie?" Logan asks.

"No! I need your help getting her back… Wait. Did you want me to talk to her? So you can get back together?" Colin asks.

 _If I thought it would help, yes. As it stands…_

"No," Logan replies. "You don't need to talk to her. I wonder what she was doing so far downtown though. You don't think she lives around here, do you?"

He is suddenly panicking.

"I don't know… She probably still lives in that rinky-dink town, don't you think? She's probably just here for a story or something. You would know better than I would," Colin says.

 _I don't know anything about her anymore. Except that I miss the way she makes me feel._

"Thanks for the coffee," Logan says, turning around and heading into his room. He closes the door behind him, sitting down with his laptop, and putting her name into the google box.

 _I have avoided doing this for so long, but I have to know._

He finds a recent byline for New York Magazine. He quickly skims the article on regentrification, heading to the end.

 **Rory Gilmore spent two years in Washington D.C covering President Obama's foreign policy. She now lives and writes in Brooklyn.**

 _She lives here._

He breathes deeply trying to get oxygen to his brain.

 _She lives here. Is that good or bad?_

 _It's good, because… maybe now that we're older, and we are in the same city, we can make this work._

 _It's bad, because… she may have never given me a second thought. She may be married to someone else by now._

 _God, what if she's married?_

He slams the laptop shut and leans back on his bed.

 _It doesn't matter that she lives here. I have a life. And it doesn't include her. If I see her, I'll be polite and charming, then I'll go my own way._

 _And if she throws her arms around me and tells me she can't go any longer without me, that's fine too._

* * *

 **August 2010**

Logan carries Aiden on his shoulders as he walks a very pregnant Honor back to her apartment from the Diana Ross playground.

"This heat is killing me," Honor moans. "I am so ready for this little girl to make her way into the world."

"I know. But you can make it three more weeks. I can come by again next weekend and take Aiden out without you. Would that help?" Logan asks.

"Of course you can do that, but Josh will be back in town Tuesday. I'm still just so happy you live here again, and we can see you so much."

Logan smiles at her as he shifts Aiden off his shoulders and into his arms. He zerberts into his neck, causing his nephew to giggle.

 _This has been the best part of being back east. This kid is the cutest._

They are stopped in the median on Broadway when he sees Rory Gilmore across the street walking perpendicular to them.

"It's her," he whispers to himself.

Honor hears him though and looks up to see Rory crossing by. She looks at him with raised eyebrows. "Do you want to go talk to her?"

He doesn't say anything, and she continues. "You should go catch her."

 _She's right. I'm going to talk to her… Just as soon as all these fucking cars pass…_

 _Jesus Christ, are there always this many cars here?_

When the light changes, they rush across the street. Logan tries to put Aiden in his stroller, but he resists. "No! You carry me!" he screeches, thrashing around.

 _Fuck! Did I just think this kid was the cutest?_

"I've got him," Honor says, attempting to strap him down into the stroller. "Go! I'll see you at home later."

He takes off down Broadway, trying to catch sight of her brown hair.

 _Where did she go?_

He pushes through the throngs of people, heading downtown six blocks.

 _She couldn't have gotten this far away. She must have turned or stopped somewhere._

He turns around and heads back toward Honor's checking every side street and window on Broadway until he gets back to 66th.

He dejectedly turns towards Honor's apartment and enters her building. When he walks in her door, she rushes up to him.

"How did it go?"

"I couldn't catch up with her. I didn't talk to her," he responds.

"Oh… Is that good or bad?" she asks.

"I don't know," Logan admits.

Aiden comes running up to him. "Carry me!" he says in a much sweeter voice.

 _This kid is the cutest._

He picks Aiden up and swings him around.

"Logan," Honor begins. "I think you should call her. I could tell by your face today that you really wanted to talk to her."

Logan ignores her and keeps swinging Aiden around.

"Logan?"

"I'll think about it."

And he does. He thinks about her and their life together all afternoon. That night, bolstered by three glasses of scotch, he opens his phone and calls her.

"The number you have dialed is no longer in service."

He ends the call and turns to his computer.

 _All I know is her Yale address, but I have to try._

He types out a quick email.

 **Hey Rory. It's been awhile. I saw you in Manhattan today, and I wanted to get in touch. Maybe we can get together for coffee. Catch up. My number hasn't changed.**

 **Logan**

He rereads it, cringing.

 _It sucks, but I doubt she'll see this anyway._

He hits send and heads to bed.

He wakes up the next morning to an automated message.

 **From: Yale System Administrator**

 **Subject: Undeliverable**

 _Sounds about right._

He deletes it without reading further.

* * *

 **September 2010**

"Thanks for coming here with me," Stephanie says to Logan as they wait in line at the Shake Shack in Madison Square Park. "I've gained some weight since… well, you know, and my mother is making me see a nutritionist. I've been eating like a rabbit. I really need this burger."

"You don't need a nutritionist. You look great. Tell your mom to back off," he replies.

Stephanie rolls her eyes. "You make it sound so easy."

He laughs out loud. "Yeah, I can talk a big game."

She smiles before turning serious. "So… how is he?"

"He's… okay."

"You guys have been going out a lot? I've seen your name in Page Six twice this summer. Nicky Hilton?" she asks, playfully pushing him

"That's… nothing," he smirks. "And Colin hasn't been going out at all. He just works and mopes. I've been going out with some of my guys from work and… actually, I've been going out with Robert."

"What? Are you _friends_ with Robert now?"

"Shut up! No… He's just around a lot," Logan says.

 _Fuck… Am I friends with Robert? What is happening to my life? I need a girlfriend._

"Is that Rory Gilmore?" Stephanie asks as if on cue, breaking into his thoughts.

He looks up to see her sitting on a park bench drinking a shake. The sun is hitting her face, and…

 _Goddamn. She is beautiful._

"Yeah. She lives in Brooklyn now," he says, trying to keep his demeanor even.

"Have you talked to her?"

"No," he says. After a moment, he admits "I tried to call, but her number's not the same."

"Logan, you have got to get on Facebook. How else are you going to stalk your exes?" she laughs. "I mean, that's basically what I use it for."

He ignores her, watching Rory wistfully.

"Go talk to her. I'll order for you," she says, nudging him along. "Do you know what you want to say?"

 _Please. I've had this conversation a thousand times in my mind._

" _Well_ , _well_. _Rory Gilmore. It's been a while."_

 _I'll be charming, yet aloof._

" _I'm doing awesome, thanks for asking. Couldn't be better."_

"Yeah, I got it. I want a double shack burger and a strawberry shake."

He heads towards Rory, building his confidence as he crosses the park. When he is close, he quickly checks her left ring finger.

 _Oh, thank God._

"Rory?" he says, sounding neither charming nor aloof.

She looks up, sees him, and then quickly stands. "Logan! Oh my gosh."

She leans toward him, and they awkwardly hug.

 _Fuck it. I want to touch her._

He pulls her in tight to really hug her, feeling her body relax against his. He inhales deeply.

 _Her shampoo is still the same._

When he backs away, she is beaming that thousand-watt smile that makes him melt. He feels his own smile taking over his face, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

"So…"

"So…" she responds. "Are you living in New York, or just visiting?"

"No, I… uh, I live in Soho. I'm back at HPG," he admits.

She smiles at him. "Mitchum is lucky to have you."

It is all he can do not to hug her again.

"What about you? Do you live here now, or…" he says, feigning ignorance.

"Yeah, I just moved to Brooklyn a few months ago. I was in D.C. covering politics, but I needed a break. I'm still doing some freelance for Politico. You know, just to pay the bills, but New York is a better fit for me right now."

They grin at each other for another moment until Logan finally breaks.

"So, do you want to maybe get coffee sometime?" he asks, the swagger back in his voice. Her smiles have given him confidence, and the feeling of invincibility she used to give him is returning.

"Sure," she says. "I have a new phone though. Let me get your number."

The smile is taking over his face again as he gives her his number. He pulls out his phone as she says "Okay, mine is 929-"

"Hey, Rory!" A man with dark brunette hair comes over to greet her.

"Hey…" she replies, giving him an awkward side hug, never losing eye contact with Logan.

 _Oh shit. She has a boyfriend._

"Jason, this is Logan. Um, Logan is… a friend from Yale… Uh, Logan, this is Jason. We, um… we work together at New York Magazine," Rory explains.

Logan can tell from the side-eye that Jason is giving Rory that he is more than a co-worker.

 _And he hasn't taken his arm off of her. I am such an idiot._

He quickly says "I gotta get back in line. It was good to see you, Rory. Nice to meet you, Jason," before turning around and heading back to Stephanie.

"But…" he hears Rory protest as he walks away.

Stephanie is waiting for him at the front of the line. "How did that go?"

"Fine. She's good. Works for New York Magazine. I'll have a double shack burger and a strawberry shake," he says to the young girl waiting to take his order.

He notices Stephanie watching him and says "Steph. I'm fine. I promise."

But he's not fine at all. Later, once he's alone, he admits some hard truths to himself.

 _Ever since I saw her a few months ago, I've been building this in my mind. She's crept back in completely. I've been running in Prospect Park just hoping to bump into her. I'm comparing other women to her again. I'm jerking off to memories of her._

 _And this whole time, she's had a fucking boyfriend._

 _But… I guess…_

 _I've been dating a lot too. She seemed happy to see me today. Maybe she didn't know I was here in New York. Maybe now she'll spend her time thinking about me. Maybe she smelled my cologne, and it's made her remember how happy we were. The way her shampoo is doing to me._

 _She has my number. The ball is in her court._

He is busy throughout the work day Monday, so he doesn't realize until the day is over that Rory hasn't called.

 _It's only been one day._

On Tuesday, he finds himself continually checking his cell phone.

 _Maybe she's abiding by the three day rule. I just didn't realize that applied to someone who's had her tongue on every part of my body before._

On Wednesday after work, he finds a voicemail from an unknown number and is positively giddy, until he listens to it. "Hi, this is Cheryl from the New York Times calling to talk about renewing your subscription."

He flops onto the couch with a beer where Colin finds him on his way in.

"What's wrong with you? You look like crap," Colin says. "You look like...me."

Logan ignores him and keeps drinking. He has a hard time sleeping that night as he realizes that Colin is right.

 _I'm_ _moping_ _around_ _like_ _she_ _dumped_ _me_. _All she's done is not call me for three days. But she hasn't called me for three years. What's different now?_

 _The only thing different is that I fooled myself into thinking something was **going** to be different. But it's not. She still doesn't want me._

 _She said no. She had reasons._

On Thursday, he comes to the answer and heads into his father's office.

"Dad, I need to talk to you."

"I'm really busy this morning, son. Can this wait?" Mitchum asks.

"No, it can't," he says sternly.

Mitchum puts down the proposal he's reading and looks up at Logan. "Okay. What's going on?"

"I can't work here, Dad. In New York. I have to leave."

"Logan. We made a deal when I bought your company. You signed a contract," Mitchum reminds him.

"I know. I'm not trying to leave HPG. I just… I can't be in New York. I'll go to Dallas, London… God, even Omaha. Wherever. I just need to get out of the city," Logan begs.

"What's really going on?" Mitchum asks again.

 _I'm obsessing over Rory Gilmore. I have to get away from her, before I make a fool of myself again. Before I get my heart broken again. I've got to start over somewhere new. Again._

"I just… I don't think I'm reaching my full potential here. I can do more for the company in a smaller market. I think," Logan finally stammers out.

Mitchum eyes him suspiciously. "Okay. I'll see what I can do."

It happens quickly.

On Saturday, Logan is on a flight to London, back to his old job in his old department. He settles into a hotel room and falls into a deep sleep. The next morning, he heads out to get a new phone.

 _One that has no connection to Rory._

Once changed over, he drops his old phone in the trash can on the corner.

 _I'm done for real this time. I've got to get a grip on myself. I'm better than this. I know I'm good at this job. I know I'm attractive and can find another woman. I can have a life. I just have to do it._

* * *

 **Bonus:**

After a week of soul-searching, Rory leaves Jason's apartment on Sunday afternoon. He hadn't seemed too upset when she'd told him that she didn't think they should continue their personal relationship at the cost of their professional one.

As she walks down his breezeway and out into the Brooklyn streets, she turns on her phone and scrolls through her contacts until she finds Logan's number. Smiling, she calls him.

"The number you have dialed is no longer in service."

* * *

A/N: When I outlined this story, I did not have Rory and Logan actually seeing each other. He was just going to see her from afar a few times. But when I started writing, they just kept interacting. I guess I just love the way these two look at each other, and I needed it to happen this way.

Also, there are several details here that come from my previous stories We Were on a Break and You're my Lobster. I want these to be able to be read solo though, so if it is getting confusing, let me know.


	5. 2011

Author Note: I do not own Gilmore Girls or any characters.

Logan's inner thoughts in italics.

* * *

 **February 2011**

Logan scans over his newly-created Facebook page. His eyes stall over the silver silhouette next to his name, and he ponders what picture to put there.

 _It doesn't really matter. Almost no one will see this anyway._

He quickly chooses his professional headshot and moves on. He is prompted to choose friends, and he selects Colin, Finn, Stephanie, and Honor.

 _I have avoided Facebook forever. It just seems so stupid. I talk to everyone I want to talk to. But since I've been in London, the time difference has made it harder for me to keep in touch with them._

 _And Honor's right. This will be the easiest way to see new pictures of Aiden and Elizabeth._

The algorithm quickly identifies other people he knows, but he closes the page.

 _Better to keep it small._

But over the next few weeks, Logan is inundated with friend requests. Members of the Life and Death Brigade. Friends from different boarding schools. Girls he's dated.

In the end, he accepts them all.

And he has to admit that it's fun catching up with people he hasn't seen or even thought of in years.

Evan and Nicole are having a baby. _I'm surprised they are the first to do this._

Seth is defending his thesis. _I'm not surprised he's the first to do_ _ **this**_ _._

Lauren is marrying someone else. _Good for her._

Robert's girlfriend is nineteen. _So he's still a douchey jackass._

One day over lunch, Logan opens his Facebook to find himself tagged in a photo from Lanny marked _#ThrowbackThursday_. Colin, Logan, and Rory are sitting on the couch in their dorm room laughing hard at something. Rory is almost sitting in his lap, and his arm is around her neck.

 _We look so young… and happy._

He has tried to put her out of his mind since he left New York, but suddenly that day in Madison Square Park is at the forefront of his mind.

" _Logan is… a friend from Yale."_

 _Yeah. A friend you dated for three years. A friend who's had sex with you in four different public places. A friend who asked you to marry him._

He inhales deeply, trying to let the bitterness go.

She's tagged in the photo as well, and he just can't resist. He opens her page.

It is marked as private, but the profile picture is clear as day. She looks gorgeous, and she's flanked on one side by Lorelei and Luke, and on the other side by Jess.

Even now, this many years later, Logan wants to punch the crooked smile off of Jess's face.

 _So I guess Jason is out of the picture._

 _Unless she tells him Jess is… a friend from high school._

 _She always wanted Jess. I guess it's finally happening._

 _God, why do I let her twist me up like this?_

He closes the webpage and vows to stay away from Facebook for a while. _Twitter is more my style anyway._

* * *

 **April 2011**

Bobbi pokes her head into Logan's office and waits for him to finish his phone call. As soon as he hangs up, she barges in.

"You haven't RSVP'd to my Royal Wedding party," she chides.

"That's real? I… why?"

"Of course it's real. You don't understand because you're American, but we've been waiting for Kate and Wills to get married for ten years! Plus... I like to throw parties."

"Okay," he sighs. "It's this weekend?"

"Yes. Saturday. The wedding starts at eleven so come by around ten. We'll have food and drinks all day," she tells him.

"Ten in the morning?" he asks incredulously. "Why are they getting married so early?"

"That's the way the royals do it, love," Bobbi answers. "Now. Are you coming?"

"Sure. Why not?"

 _I've got nothing else to do._

"Are you bringing anyone?" she asks.

"Like a date? No. A party for the royal wedding is not how I would woo a woman, Bobbi," he says, smirking.

"Good. I have a couple of single girlfriends, and I don't want them to be the only ones."

"Bobbi. I do not want to be set up," Logan says sternly.

"Who's getting set up?" Will asks as he enters Logan's office.

"No one," Logan says.

"Right then. My sister's is in town for the weekend. I want you to meet her," Will says.

"You want your sister to date Logan?... But… I want my friend Sophia to date Logan," Bobbi says.

"No. I do not want my sister to date Logan. He's a whore. I just want him to meet her," Will says.

"Hey!" Logan cries. "I'm sitting right here. I am not a... And did you not hear me say that I didn't want to be set up? … I can actually get a date on my own, thanks. I'll be at this silly party. I'll meet everyone, but that's all I can guarantee."

* * *

That Saturday morning, Logan arrives at Bobbi and Harry's flat to great fanfare. She has gone all out in her decorations, and she escorts him into the living room for a mimosa.

"Wow. This is impressive," he tells her.

Bobbi's husband Harry comes over to greet him. "Can you believe we are having a party this big for something so stupid?" he says as he shakes Logan's hand.

They both look at Bobbi with raised eyebrows.

"Oh, sod off. It is going to be magical! Logan, come meet some of my friends," Bobbi says.

"Good luck, mate," Harry says as Bobbi drags Logan toward the crowd.

Logan spends the first hour meeting all of Bobbi's friends from university. He has to acknowledge there are attractive women here, and after a moment's hesitation, he is full-on Huntzberger. Confident, charming, snarky.

Just before the wedding actually starts, Bobbi pulls him aside. "Easy, tiger. We have all just turned thirty, and we're watching a wedding."

He laughs at her. "Didn't you want me to date one of them?"

"Yes, but not the tarts you're talking to. Sophia," she says motioning to a woman sitting on the couch. "She is my best mate."

" _No_. I'm not dating your best friend. That's just a disaster waiting to happen."

"But, she's the best!" Bobbi cries. "I'll stay out of it, I swear."

"You could no more stay out of it-"

"Logan!" Will says as he approaches. "How's it going?"

"Uh, good, man-"

"This is my sister, Melanie," Will interrupts. "Could you mind her while I grab some food?"

Will abruptly takes off with Bobbi huffing behind him. "I thought you didn't want him to date your sister…"

Logan and Melanie awkwardly smile at each other.

"So… I don't actually need minding," she says. "Been going to the loo by myself for twenty-five years."

Logan laughs out loud. "Good. I'm not sure it's appropriate for me to take you into the bathroom anyway."

"Really? Will says you've been known to take women into the bathroom. So just… not me?" She lifts an eyebrow.

Logan feels a blush creep up his face. "Not that… I don't make a habit of taking just _any_ woman into the bathroom," he stutters. He knows Will is talking about the time Nick caught him and Rory exiting the bathroom of the Orchid Room all those years ago.

 _God. I will never live that down. And I don't want to think about her today._

 _Fuck. Now I'm going to spend the entire day irritated and... Just don't think about her. Stop. She's not a part of my life anymore. Stop._

"That was my girlfriend, and… I mean, you're really cute, and it's not that I wouldn't take _you_ into the bathroom… But as a general rule… I don't… And I'm just going to shut up now."

 _Well there goes confident and charming._

Melanie bursts into laughter. "Relax. I'm just busting your balls. You're not my type, anyway. Too pretty. Too much hair product."

Logan smirks. "Please. I'm everyone's type. And this is just the right amount of hair product."

Will returns with a plate of food. "Why are you two smiling at each other like that? Don't smile at my sister, Logan."

The wedding is beginning, so they head back into the living room, where they can see the television. Melanie sits down on the couch, patting for Logan to sit beside her.

Everyone oohs and ahs over Prince William and Harry as they enter the Abbey in their military uniforms.

" _Say hi to William and Harry for me."_

Logan shakes his head, attempting to clear his thoughts, and sits down. He is trying hard to pay attention when Bobbi's friend, Sophia, sits down on his other side.

She introduces herself, joking about the wedding being an excuse to drink all day. Logan smiles, and he clinks his bottle against her champagne glass. He small-talks her for a while, finding her interesting, but not spark-inducing. They watch the procession together until Sophia asks a loaded question.

"What do you think about marriage?"

He pauses for a moment, turning his head back to the television as the wedding continues to unfold.

 _There was a time when I couldn't wait to get married. Now it's sure to be something that will be forced on me._

He chooses his words carefully. "I think… if you can find the right person… someone who you love and is your best friend, then marriage is a no-brainer."

He looks at Sophia, and she is…

 _I can see the fucking hearts in her eyes. Backtrack._

"On the other hand," he continues, "I personally can't imagine finding that person."

 _At least not a second time._

"So it's probably not in the cards for me." Logan finishes. Sophia is slowly nodding her head and shifting away from him. He turns back toward the television, and they watch the rest of the wedding silently.

Their traditional vows give him bizarre feelings of malcontent. _I feel sick to my stomach. I gotta get out of here. I can't watch this beautiful dark-haired woman marry this blond man._

"I'm going to get another drink. Can I get anything for you?" he asks Sophia politely.

 _I don't want her to latch on, but I don't want her to hate me either… I don't what the fuck I want. I can't believe I am such a mess over this._

She shakes her head, and he jumps off the couch, grabbing another beer on his way onto the balcony.

He drinks alone for a while, trying to self-actualize why he is letting the wedding of Prince William bother him so much.

" _Say hi to William and Harry for me."_

 _But it's not even that. Being around all these single women is making me realize how much I have come to hate dating… and how much I actually like having a girlfriend._

 _I just have to stop comparing everyone to her. It's pathetic. So Sophia didn't make me want to rip her clothes off. Whatever. She's nice... and pretty… and… I have to stop waiting for another great love. It's not coming…_

Melanie follows him outside a few minutes later and sits down next to him. "So what's your deal, Logan? Will says you're one of the most fun blokes he knows, but honestly, you seem kind of dour."

Logan actually laughs out loud. "I'm not. I like to think I am fun. Today's just a weird day, and I didn't expect it to be."

"Why?"

" _Say hi to William and Harry for me."_

"It's just weird, is all. I don't know. There are a bunch of single women in there watching a wedding…"

 _And probably none of them are more depressed about it than me._

"You wanna get out of here? Get a drink somewhere else?" Logan asks her.

"My brother specifically said not to shag you," she says, smiling.

"Well… then let's get Will and take him with us," Logan says.

"No. Let's leave him. That way if I _decide_ to shag you, it won't be awkward," Melanie laughs.

She and Logan sneak out the door and head to a bar. She's loud, and funny, and definitely not _his_ type.

When it's clear they won't be sleeping together, they invite Will to join them later for dinner, and they spend the rest of the evening drinking and laughing. He manages not to think about Rory anymore for the rest of the day, reminding him of the valuable lesson he learned in California years ago.

 _I can do this. I don't need a girlfriend. I just need to throw myself into my work. And cultivate real friendships with people like I had with John and Kevin. And then she'll go to the back of my mind._

 _Where she belongs._

* * *

 **November 2011**

"Let's go over the numbers one more time," Steven says to Logan.

"Okay," he agrees, as Steven begins peppering him with the talking points of the profit and loss statement.

Bobbi and David sip their coffee as they silently watch the exchange.

When Steven is done, Bobbi chimes in. "You've got this, Logan. There's no way your father can say no. It just makes financial sense, and it is an infinitely more efficient business model."

"I know. But you don't know my father like I do. If he senses any weakness…"

"He won't," Steven assures him. "You are going to blow him away."

"You're right," Logan says, hoping to sound more confident than he feels.

 _I know this is a good move, but Mitchum will be hesitant to let me have any control._

 _And they are all depending on me._

He drains his cup of coffee, stands up, and walks out of his office. He heads straight into the conference room to wait on his father. While he waits, he runs through his talking points one final time.

 _I've got to nail this. Mitchum can't hold me down forever._

Twenty-three minutes later, Mitchum saunters in.

"Son," he booms. "I understand you have something you want to discuss with me."

"Dad. Sit. How was your flight?"

"Fine. Caught up on a lot of reading. Our publications are really coming back around. Got some good reporting going on out there. Do you miss writing? Maybe I should put you back in the field for a while."

"Um… Actually Dad, that's what I want to talk to you about. My place here in the company... It's not in writing anymore. All of my work at HPG… actually all of my work since I graduated has been in digital media. I've worked on acquisition of websites and web content, and you know that I'm good at it. So I do have a proposition for you," Logan says confidently.

Mitchum raises his eyebrows and motions for Logan to continue.

Logan hands his father a bound proposal. "Let's open to page one."

His father is still staring incredulously at him.

 _I'm serious, asshole. Open to page one._

"What you'll find here is the amount of revenue that HPG brings in in the digital marketplace, broken down by format- social media, literary webpages, and publication webpages."

Mitchum finally glances down at his dossier, and Logan continues.

"The second graph is what's available in the market. If you compare the two, you'll see that HPG is leaving a lot of money on the table. Okay, go to the next page… Here is an outline of what I think HPG is capable of: better social media including facebook, twitter, tumblr, youtube, and linkedin. Better webpages for our authors and for our dailies. These are accompanied by the estimates of revenue I believe we could gain from each."

Mitchum turns toward the table and scoots his chair a little closer.

 _Finally. I should not be surprised that the money is making him pay attention._

"Next five pages. These are graphs of predicted growth for users of each of these platforms projected over the next ten years. Face it, Dad. Digital media is the future. Print will be gone in fifty years."

"Okay. This is all fine and good. What exactly are you proposing?" Mitchum asks.

"I think it's time to take advantage of the opening here. I propose a new subsidiary of Huntzberger Publishing: Huntzberger Digital Media."

Mitchum frowns. "And how would this work? How is it different from what you're already doing?"

 _This is it. Leave it all on the table._

"We would become a completely separate entity from the print division. But all under the HPG umbrella of course. We would focus exclusively on our web presence as well as acquiring and opening new platforms. I would need to hire staff for specific duties."

Mitchum smirks. "And who would these people be?"

"Next page. Steven Murphy. Defacto CFO. This is his resume."

"Didn't he used to be your secretary?" Mitchum smirks again.

"Yes. So I know first-hand how organized and attentive to detail he is. He has a degree in finance from Oxford. He'll be in charge of the actual running of the business. Next page. Bobbi Lyle."

"Oh. Legs. I see why you want her," Mitchum says.

"Dad, come on… Bobbi will be the VP in charge of client development. She'll oversee authors connecting with fans on twitter. She'll help nurture youtube pages and tumblr blogs for internet personalities," Logan says.

"Internet personalities?" Mitchum asks skeptically.

"Yes. You have no idea how much these kids are raking in with advertisers. They need agents and managers, and that's where Bobbi will come in. Will Keating is going to work with her recruiting the talent.

Next page. David Smith. This is his resume. He's been with HPG for twelve years. VP in charge of IT and data collection. Basically, he will be overseeing all the technical work.

Next is Aruv Patel. In-house legal. This is his resume.

They all have existing staff under them that will fill in their teams, so new hirings will be minimal.

With the exception of Aruv, these are all current, long-term HPG employees who are not asking for raises. If you flip to the next page, you'll see the line where we anticipate we will start increasing revenue. At this point, we'll start a profit sharing plan, which is outlined on the next page."

Mitchum leans back in his chair and studies Logan silently for a moment.

"And where do you fit into this?" he finally asks.

"CEO. I'll be overseeing it all. Similar to what you do for HPG."

Mitchum continues to stare him down. "You think you can do what I do?"

 _Even better than you do. Because I'm not a total dick._

"Dad, I could never do what you do." Logan says, stroking Mitchum's ego. "This is a much smaller scale. And I've learned so much watching you through the years. I know I can do this. I'm passionate about it. I really think this is the way to take HPG into the future."

"You understand this means sixty hour weeks. Constant availability. Total responsibility. The buck stops with you."

"I understand. And I'm up for the challenge."

"I have to say, I'm impressed with your presentation. I want a week to look through this and have legal look into the contracting. You'll hear from me," Mitchum says, standing.

"I appreciate that," Logan replies and shakes his father's hand.

Once Mitchum is gone, his team moves in.

Among the cacophony of questions, Logan smiles.

 _I've got him. This is going to happen. I'm going to be CEO of Huntzberger Digital Media._

He admonishes his partners to relax; Mitchum has asked for time, and they can't get ahead of themselves.

But they all grin at each other, unable to contain their excitement.

When Mitchum delivers the good news three days later, Logan takes them all out for drinks.

 _I can't remember the last time I was this happy._

 _I don't need her to make me happy. I can do this for myself._

As they all take shots together, Logan vows to remember this feeling… and how he obtained it.

 _Hard work, good friends, besting Mitchum._

 _Not Rory._

* * *

A/N: I know Logan's work is not as fun as his personal life, but he somehow has to become the successful workaholic we see in AYITL. We'll get back to his sex life in 2012!


	6. 2012

Author Note: I don't own any characters.

Logan's inner thoughts in italics.

* * *

 **March 2012**

"This is lovely, Logan. Thank you," Shira says as Logan pulls her chair out for her.

"Well, it is Mother's Day. At least here in England. I'm glad you were able to come visit," Logan responds, pushing her chair back in. He walks around the table and sits down across from her.

"I was so pleased you called. Your father didn't want me tagging along, but…"

"He can't deny you lunch on Mother's Day with your son, can he?" Logan asks.

Shira eyes him skeptically. "I would love to think that this is about your love for me, but I get the feeling something else is going on."

"Not at all," Logan fibs. "Let's get you a glass of champagne."

He charms his mother through the salads, waiting until they are cleared before asking her what he brought her here to ask.

"Have you seen Honor lately?"

"Of course. She is still trying not to hire a nanny, so she asks me to help her out a lot. No nanny… Can you imagine?" Shira says with a laugh.

"No, I cannot," Logan replies. _Nor can I imagine you helping out._ "So… has she mentioned why she won't take any calls from me?"

Shira raises an eyebrow. "That's why you wanted me here, isn't it?"

Logan doesn't respond.

"You want me to speak to Honor on your behalf?" she asks. With a stilted laugh, she continues "I should have known you wanted something… She's just upset that you didn't come home for Thanksgiving or Christmas and that you won't let her come here for your birthday."

"It's just not possible, Mom. My workload is… well, it's crazy. I have to take a week for Colin's wedding in June. And that's all I can do. I can't have her and the kids here no matter how much I would like them to visit. I thought she understood that."

"Did you tell her you were taking time off for Colin?" Shira asks, knowingly.

 _Shit. Yes. Yes, I did. She's always so sensitive to her place in my life compared to Colin and Finn._

 _But this isn't like last time. I'm not **trying** to exclude her. I just have to make this company succeed. I would ignore Colin's wedding too if I didn't think Steph would kill me._

"She won't take calls, she's not responding to emails, and I just don't know what to do short of flying to New York, which as I just said, I cannot do. Will you please talk to her?" Logan begs.

Shira peers down her nose at him. "I'll see what I can do."

Dessert has just been set down at their table when Shira looks up and coos. "Aww, Celine, mon cherie. Quel plaisir de vous voir!"

Logan turns to look behind him, as Shira stands to greet two women who have just entered the dining room.

They exchange kisses before turning back to Logan. "Dear, this is Celine Marchand and her daughter Odette. Celine's husband is Jean Marchand. I believe you and your father have been meeting with him this week about a possible merger."

"Yes, we have," Logan says as he stands to greet their guests. "Logan Huntzberger. It's nice to put your faces with your names." He takes Celine's waiting hand, then turns his attention to Odette. Smiling broadly, he shakes her hand.

Odette rolls her eyes and sighs.

 _Wait. Do they not speak English? My French is crap. I don't want Jean to think I was not perfectly hospitable to his family._

"Mamá? We should get to our table," Odette says in perfect English.

Logan is taken aback by her response to him. _Huh?_ _What's up her ass?_

He glances at the older women to see if they have noticed Odette's hostility.

 _Oh, God. No wonder she's rolling her eyes. I thought my days of being set up by Shira were over._

Their mothers are beaming at the two of them. Shira has her hands clasped together at her chest, and Celine exclaims "Si belle!"

"Dear, why don't you escort Odette to her table so that Celine and I can sit here together and catch up?" Shira asks Logan in a condescending tone.

"Mamá!" Odette exclaims.

"Mother," Logan says through gritted teeth. "We're just about done, and this is _your_ Mother's Day celebration."

Shira fakes a smile. "He is so sweet to me," she says to Celine. She then leans into Logan's ear and whispers "If you want me to talk to Honor, you will do this."

 _Geez. Nothing can happen in this family without quid pro quo._

Logan pulls back, offers his mother _his_ fakest smile, and places his hand on the small of Odette's back. "Let's get you to your table."

They follow the maitre'd to a table on the other side of the dining room.

"I'm sorry. This is so embarrassing," Odette says as they sit down.

"Don't worry about it. I've been fending off my mother's attempts to set me up since I was fifteen," Logan says.

"And... no offense, but I would never actually date anyone my mother wanted me to date," Odette says with a wry smile.

"None taken. Same here. Let's hang out here for a bit, and then we'll just leave before they even notice we're gone," Logan offers. "Your English is great. I assume you are French though?"

"Oui. Born in Paris. But I went to Brown, and after five years in Providence, my English is good."

"Aww, Brown," Logan teases. "The little Ivy Leaguer that could."

"Oh. Let me guess. Harvard? No, no- Princeton. You look like a snotty Princeton guy."

Logan clicks his cheeks. "Yale. I'm a snotty _Yale_ guy."

She smiles. "Brown was fantastic. I don't care what you say."

"Of course. So how's that degree in philosophy working out for you?" Logan says, smirking.

"My degree is in art history, thank you. Much more practical."

Logan bursts out laughing, and Odette can't help but smile back.

"I'm sure you have some degree in something boring if you're working with my father," she says.

"Yes, totally boring. Business marketing is not nearly as pragmatic as art history," Logan answers cheekily.

"I work in an art gallery, so it actually _is_ pragmatic," she contends.

Logan smiles and takes a minute to study her. Her thick blond hair falls long down her back, and her brown eyes are warm. There is a small gap in her front teeth that would be off-putting in someone else, but on Odette, it's adorable.

 _She's definitely the prettiest woman my mother has ever tried to set me up with._

They continue the banter with ease. She asks how he ended up in London, and he learns her favorite painters. When she begins to discuss the way the internet is revolutionizing art, Logan's interest peaks.

"So what are you doing with my father?" she asks.

"His publishing houses in France are very lucrative, and we want to merge them into our print company. We have offices in London and the U.S., and we want to expand into Western Europe. Actually, though I work mainly with digital media. The stuff you were talking about with net art, that's my wheelhouse. I even have a specific division for that."

"Ugh. You're one of those guys. Mergers, expansion, business. Just when I thought there may be something to like about you."

"Hmm… There isn't anything you like about me?" he asks, raising his eyebrows.

"Is there anything you like about me?" Odette shoots back.

He eyes her for a moment. "I think there's probably a lot of things I _could_ like about you… But I can't give my mother the satisfaction. So no, I don't like anything about you."

She smiles broadly. "Perfect. I don't like anything about you either."

The chatter continues through lunch until they realize that their mothers have left the restaurant.

"Wow, it's late. Um, should we go?" Odette asks uncertainly.

"Probably. Yes. Yes, we should definitely go. It was nice to meet you, though," Logan replies. "And since we're not going to be seeing each other in any other capacity…" He pauses to smile at her. "Here's my card. You know, if you come across any digital artists who may need help with their platform or with representation."

Her eyes roll above her grin, but she takes the card. He escorts her out and puts her in a taxi.

 _That's about the best Mother's Day lunch with Shira I could have hoped for._

* * *

 **June 2012**

The Wednesday before Colin's wedding, Logan arrives at LaGuardia and takes a cab straight to Honor's apartment on the Upper West Side. He's exhausted from his flight, but he has to take the time to make things right with Honor. The doorman lets him up, and he wearily knocks on her door.

When she sees him there, she wordlessly hugs him.

"I changed my flight out. I'll have to work from our New York office some, but I'm going to be here next week to be with you and Josh and the kids. I'm sorry," he says against her hair.

"It's okay. Come inside. The kids are about to go to bed, but I know they'll want to see you."

Logan breathes a sigh of relief before heading into her apartment.

* * *

The next morning, Logan walks through Central Park towards Colin and Stephanie's apartment. They are waiting for him in the lobby, and they excitedly greet each other.

"I can't believe how long it's been since we've seen you," Stephanie exclaims.

"I don't think we've ever gone this long," Logan says to Colin. "Now you, Steph… I didn't see you for a year and a half when you were dating that douchebag in-"

"We don't talk about him, Logan. He doesn't exist," Colin says decisively.

Stephanie and Logan smirk at each other as they turn to walk out of the building. As they head down the street toward Starbucks, they catch up on each other's life.

"Finn and Robert are supposed to be here at eleven, but you know what that means," Stephanie tells him.

"I never plan on seeing Finn before three," Logan responds.

Ten minutes later, Robert walks in.

"Sorry I'm late. I had a thing at the office… but now I'm off until Sunday, and it's wedding time! Logan, how've you been?"

"Great. London is working out for me. How about you?"

Robert launches into a long-winded response.

 _So nothing's changed much here. It's still always about him._

Eventually, Robert winds it up, and Stephanie takes over the conversation.

"I need some things from you guys this weekend. Now, I know you are going to be drinking on the golf course tomorrow, but please just… not too much. I want all of you guys present and somewhat sober at the rehearsal tomorrow night," she pleads.

"Steph, don't worry. We're not in college anymore. We're not going to get wasted," Colin says.

She throws him a side-eye. "Sweetie, I'm mostly talking to your friends. I know _you_ know better than to show up drunk at our wedding rehearsal," she says in a stern voice.

Logan laughs. "We'll behave. I promise."

"One other thing, Logan. Juliana is one of my bridesmaids, and I really need you to stay away from her. I just cannot take extra drama this weekend. I mean, my mom is already-"

"I'm sorry," Logan interrupts, furrowing his brow. "Who is Juliana?"

They all stare at him for a moment.

"Dude," Robert says. "Even I know you used to bang Stephanie's roommate."

Logan racks his brain. "When was this?"

"Right before you met Rory," Colin says quietly.

 _I should feel bad that I don't remember this girl._

"What does she look like?" Logan asks.

"She's fucking hot," Robert says just as Colin comments "Really hot."

"Really?" Logan says. _How can I have no clue who this girl is?_

Stephanie glares at Robert and Colin. "Yes, she's pretty, but she's also a huge drama queen, and I don't have time to deal with it this weekend. Just don't touch any of my friends okay?"

"Fine," Logan says.

"And don't touch my sister either," Colin chimes in.

"Never," Robert says.

"Okay, Colin and I have one last counseling session at the church, but we are all meeting at our place for dinner right?" Stephanie asks.

"Yes. And we will get Finn there. You guys need to relax. Everything's going to be fine," Logan admonishes them.

"He's right, babe. Everything is going to be fine. Better than fine. Let's go get this counseling bullshit over with," Colin says.

"Colin, it's not bullshit. It's important…" they hear Stephanie say as they leave the coffee shop.

Robert and Logan sit quietly for a moment. Logan sips his coffee and people-watches

 _If we're not partying, I still just don't really have anything in common with him._

"So…" he says.

"So…" Robert responds. "I know bridesmaids have gotten you in trouble before, but… you're going to hook up with Juliana, right? Because if not, I want a shot at her."

"Oh, yeah. I am," Logan says. "Just as soon as I figure out which one she is."

 _I'm not working for the first time in months. I need to get laid._

* * *

On Friday, Logan, Finn, and Seth walk through the doors of the St. Regis after a long day of golf. They stop in the bar for a beer before they need to get ready for the rehearsal.

Logan turns to Finn. "Now that Colin's gone… he made a big deal about nobody touching his sister. Somehow he still doesn't know about you and Erin."

"There's nothing much to know. She calls me when she needs to scratch an itch."

Seth laughs. "I don't think that is going to sound better to Colin."

"Well, let's not tell him, shall we? Besides, she already texted that she's bringing a plus one… There's no need to even get into it," Finn says.

"So obviously I know Erin. But the other bridesmaids... I'm not sure who they all are," Logan begins. "Do you guys remember Steph's roommate, Juliana?"

"Yes, she was gorgeous," Seth says.

"I don't remember which one she was," Logan admits.

"Me either," Finn says.

 _Thank God. I'm not going crazy._

"She had reddish brown hair. Finn, you have to remember her. You wanted her bad... Remember how you were with redheads? But she was totally into Logan," Seth says.

Finn shakes his head. "Nope. Not coming to me. And who would choose this guy over me? There must be something wrong with her."

Seth laughs and turns to Logan. "How can you not remember someone you slept with?"

Finn grins. "You see dear smart friend… We had very different college experiences than you. You went to class, and we fucked pretty people."

"Honestly those years are kind of a blur. I mean lots of drugs, girls… At least until…" _Rory._ "But I am kind of embarrassed that I don't know her. Seth, if you see her tonight, point her out, okay?" Logan says.

 _Rory somehow made me forget other women. But now that I've finally gotten her out my mind, it's time I reacquaint myself with this Juliana._

* * *

As soon as he sees her, he remembers who she is. _Thank God. I was starting to think I was even sluttier than I remembered._

He heads her way, his charm on the offensive. "Juliana. It's been too long. You look amazing." Her cheeks flush as he leans in to kiss her cheek.

"Thank you. How have you been? I heard you live in London."

"Yes-"

"Everyone, everyone. Can I have your attention up here please?" the wedding coordinator interrupts him.

"We'll talk in a minute," he whispers to her, giving her his biggest smile. His confidence soars as she blushes again.

They are lined up by height along the altar by the coordinator who is asking seemingly inane questions to all of them. (Are your wedding shoes taller than this? Does your hair always stand up this much?)

 _Yes. It does, thanks. I have great hair._

He looks at Juliana, who rolls her eyes at the coordinator. He winks, and she smiles. The thrill of the chase is real, the energy coursing through his body.

 _How long has it been since I've had time to seduce a woman properly?_

After an hour, the coordinator finally lets them go with strict instructions about when and where to be for pictures the next day. Stephanie and Colin lead the processional through Central Park toward Tavern on the Green where the dinner is being held. Logan hangs back to walk with Juliana.

He offers his arm, inquiring about where she lives and what she's been up to.

"I've been back in Boston since graduation. I don't know if you remember… that's where I'm from."

"Of course I remember," he lies.

"I work in an advertising firm," she says.

"Oh, very Mad Men."

"Well, less smoking and drinking, but with about the same amount of misogyny. One of my father's friends owns it. I think I'm really good at it, but he'll always see me as George's little girl, no matter what ideas I come up with."

"I can definitely relate to that," Logan says. "Just in the last year, I've finally started to get out from-"

"Logan?"

Logan turns to his left to see Doyle McMaster. "Hey Doyle!" he says, walking toward him to shake his hand. He's always actually liked Doyle, and he lets him pull him into a hug. As they embrace, he looks over Doyle's shoulder to see Paris sitting on a bench with a double stroller beside her.

Sitting next to her is Rory Gilmore. She looks up at him with those big blue eyes, and his heart skips a beat.

 _This is her at her prettiest. Ponytail, no make-up. The way she looked when she woke up. She always woke up frisky, and-_

 _Stop… Stop…_

 _Pay attention to the gorgeous woman to your right who wants you. Not the (also admittedly gorgeous) woman in front of you who rejects you over and over._

"Wow, you have kids…" Logan stammers, trying to seem calm.

"Yeah, come see."

"Oh, okay."

He glances at Juliana, giving her a small smile. She nods, dropping his arm and following him toward the group.

"Paris. Rory. It's good to see you," he begins.

"Huntzberger," Paris growls, as Rory smiles. "Hey, Logan."

"This is Tim and Gabi," Doyle says, pointing to his children.

"Congratulations. They're beautiful."

There is an awkward moment of silence as they stare at each other.

"Are you living in New York? Or…" Doyle asks, attempting to lighten the air.

"No, no. I'm back in London. I… uh… moved there after…" _Rory rejected me again._ "Uh… a few years ago. I'm just in town for Colin and Stephanie's wedding. It's tomorrow, so we were… uh… you know… we were rehearsing. And now… we're going to the dinner." Logan can hear his idiocy, but he can't seem to make it stop. He sneaks a glimpse at Rory, who is staring down the woman at his side.

"This must be a lovely reunion for you two," Rory finally says, motioning between Logan and Juliana.

 _What? I know that tone. That tone sounds familiar._

" _Can't stop Bobbi… I like Bobbi. I do. I don't like the fact that she's not a big, swarthy dude…"_

 _She sounds…_

 _Jealous._

"Oh… this is Juliana. She's a bridesmaid," he explains.

"We've met," Rory says. "You lived with Stephanie in college, right?"

Juliana nods. "It's nice to see you, Rory."

Rory gives them a tight smile.

"We have to catch up with the group, but… it was great to see you guys. Really," Logan says.

Doyle full-on hugs him again, making Logan smile. Over his shoulder, he looks at the girls. Paris rolls her eyes, but Rory is looking at him almost…

 _Wistfully. Hmm._

He turns to leave, placing his hand on the small of Juliana's back and leading her back to the main path.

"Was that weird for you?" she asks him.

"No. I just didn't know that you two knew each other," he says.

"Yeah. I'm not proud of it, but when you first started seeing her, I cornered her at a party and told her to back off of you. I was such a mean girl."

 _Rory knows I've slept with her. That's what she meant when she said_ " _This must be a lovely reunion for you two."_

He turns back to look at Rory. She is watching him, but as he catches her eye, she quickly looks down into her lap. He can see her blush from here.

 _She_ _ **is**_ _jealous._

"Doesn't really matter now, does it?" Smiling, he takes Juliana's hand and speeds them up until he can see Finn and Robert again.

Once inside the restaurant with a drink in his hand, he finds Finn.

"I just saw Rory in the park."

"Dear Reporter Girl. How is she?" he asks.

"She's seems fine. We didn't talk for long," Logan answers.

"The more important question is how are _you_?"

"I'm… I'm actually fine," he says. _And I am. Glad to know she still doesn't like to see me with another woman. But I'm truly fine._

"Good," Finn smiles. "Because you have a lovely redhead on your arm tonight. Who I will gladly take off your hands if Rory needs your full attention."

Logan smiles. "Back off, buddy. This redhead is mine."

* * *

Later that evening in his hotel room, Logan rolls off of Juliana.

 _That was fantastic. How did I block this girl out of my memory? I know I was very focused on Ace, but damn… I mean, Stephanie's right. She's a total drama queen, but she's hot and she's fun. At least for this weekend._

 _Maybe I've finally really moved on from Rory. I didn't think about her at all tonight._

Juliana snuggles back into him. "Well that was even better than I remembered."

 _If it was all like that, I wish I remembered it._

"Yeah. No shit. That was amazing," he agrees.

Logan pulls her close, closes his eyes, and drifts off to sleep.

 _She was jealous._

* * *

"Good evening, everyone," Logan addresses the guests at the reception. "I'm Logan Huntzberger, and I'm the best man-"

"Co-best man," Finn interrupts.

"Yes, co-best man. Sorry, Finn. So... we are here tonight to celebrate the marriage of Colin and Stephanie, two people who I love more than anything."

He pauses to look at the happy couple. Colin is smiling, and Stephanie is already wiping a tear away.

"Don't start Steph. I'm just getting going... So I've known Colin for... what feels like forever. He has always been a great friend, loyal and honest. He's always up for a good time. I could tell some stories, but I won't because our parents are all here.

But when we met Stephanie our sophomore year in college, something changed. He became focused on this goal. He worked for months to get Stephanie to notice him. He started eating in the dining hall when he knew she'd be there. And we all know how expensive Colin's tastes are. So if he was eating mystery meat for this girl, we knew it meant something. Eventually, he wore her down, and so began their story.

Steph, you already know this, but you are the _best_ parts of him. You tone down his worst impulses, and you highlight his best. And Colin, well… actually you don't add much to Stephanie. She's perfect the way she is. I know this seems like I'm praising Steph and roasting Colin, but… I guess that's what I'm doing. Colin, you're a lucky guy."

Logan waits until the laughter and applause dies before continuing.

"Now there have been some hiccups for you two, but even through the break-ups, I think everyone in this room always knew that we'd end up here. Because you two are truly meant to be together. You're best friends… and partners. And together, you're greater than the sum of your parts.

So raise your glasses. To Colin and Stephanie. May they always be as happy as they are today."

Logan sips his champagne and hugs the newlyweds.

"Thanks, man," Colin says.

"I love you, Logan," Steph whispers. "You'll find the same thing. I know it."

"I hope so," he says smiling, before returning to his seat next to Juliana.

"That was really lovely. You make me want to find someone like that."

 _Shit. She's not talking about me, is she? I mean, sure... I eventually want to get married, but not to her._

The terror must show on his face, because she laughs.

"Calm down. I'm not talking about you. You live in London. I know we're just having fun this weekend. Look, I know I was… intense about you in college, but that was a long time ago. Okay?"

He nods, gulping down his champagne.

"Are we good?" she asks again.

"Yeah, we're good."

"Excellent. Because I have plans for you for later," she says, leaning in to whisper her dirty thoughts into his ear.

* * *

 **November 2012**

Logan slips away from the one-year anniversary party and heads to the balcony. He has been shaking hands and smiling for hours, but he's exhausted and he needs a moment to decompress.

 _Obviously, I'm proud of the company and what we've accomplished. But the best part about this party is forcing Mitchum to publicly acknowledge how well we've done._

When he steps outside, he is surprised to see Odette standing there, smoking a cigarette.

"Haven't you heard those things will kill you?" he asks, causing her to turn around in surprise.

"You. Isn't this party for you? Shouldn't you be inside so people can kiss the ring?" she asks sarcastically.

He closes the gap between them. "I needed a break from being told how amazing I am. I knew you would set me straight."

She drops her cigarette and grinds it with her heel.

"I'm sorry. Apparently you've done something incredible here. I shouldn't make fun."

He smiles. "Are you just in for the party or…"

"Yes. Papá wanted our whole family here. Somehow, my brother got out of it, but… I needed to get out of Paris for a bit anyway. I had a big fight with my boyfriend, and… never mind. You don't care."

"Not particularly, but I've been told I'm a good listener. Try me."

"Just… Henri is a painter, and he's moody. Sometimes very depressed. Sometimes… how do you say… up? Very up?"

"Manic?" he offers.

"Yes. But he's down right now. He hasn't sold a painting in a few months, and… he just mopes," Odette says. "I like to be happy. I didn't want him to come here with my parents if he was going to be depressed. They hate him anyway... Because he's not rich. I can't give them any more ammunition. So I told him not to come to London, and we had a fight, and he broke up with me."

"I understand the appeal of dating someone your parents hate. Trust me. But if you're serious about him, make up as soon as you get home. Tell him you don't care what your parents think," Logan offers.

"Thanks. I think you are right. I'm an adult. He makes me happy, and it doesn't matter what they think. But that's enough about Henri. Tell me who all these people are."

He runs through the guest list, praising some, eviscerating others. They laugh steadily until Logan remembers that he is in fact the guest of honor and needs to show his face again.

"Will I see you again before you head back to Paris?" he asks her.

"Probably not. I'm going to go home tomorrow and make up with Henri."

He smiles at her, and she suddenly leans forward to quickly kiss his lips.

"I thought you didn't like anything about me," Logan says.

"I don't, but you _are_ a good listener. And you have pretty lips." Odette smiles one last time before she returns back to the party.

Logan waits a few moments before following her. He is quickly joined by his colleagues, and they make the rounds again.

 _Back to work._

* * *

A/N: Have any of you watched The Handmaid's Tale (Starring our girl Alexis Bledel) yet?


	7. 2013

Author Note: Thank you guys so much for reading and reviewing. I know I have fallen off with my replies. I promise to do better. As always, Logan's inner thoughts in italics.

All characters belong to Gilmore Girls.

* * *

 **January 2013**

Logan waits in line in the food court at JFK on January 2nd, 2013. His head is pounding, and his vision is bleary.

 _I'm getting old. I didn't even do any drugs last night to justify how shitty I feel right now._

 _Maybe it's not age. Maybe I just work hard now and party less, so I can't hang with Robert and Finn anymore._

 _That's it. I'm just really good at my job._

He scans the menu on the wall in front of him and remembers some solid advice he got once.

"I need three tacos and a large Coke. Please."

As he sits to eat, he thinks about the upcoming year. He has never made resolutions. Never. But lately he's felt like he's been spinning his wheels.

 _Maybe I should set some goals. At least contemplate what I want out of life._

 _Work-wise… things are going great. I would love to keep expanding, maybe into Western Europe. And I would like to give all my people raises..._

 _With my friends… I want to do a better job at keeping in touch with them. Especially now that Colin and Steph are pregnant. I should know their kid. And I'm not feeling as close to Finn as I used to. Without sharing our lives, we don't have much in common anymore. I'm going to fix that. We've been friends for too long to drift like this..._

 _And my friends in London… At least once a month, I have to say yes when one of them asks me to do something. Work functions don't count. All work and no play has made me boring..._

 _Family… I want to come home more. The kids are getting so big already, and I'm missing so much. I will let Honor and Josh visit me whenever they ask. No more excuses..._

 _And I guess… on that front… I know I want a family of my own someday. I'm about to be 31, and I haven't been in a real relationship in… God. Almost four years. I need to work on that. Date women of quality. Stop sleeping with randoms…_

 _Figure out if the problem is… me._

 _And I want to finally compete in a triathalon._

He finishes his tacos and drains his Coke. His head does feel better.

 _She always knew what she was talking about._

* * *

Two weeks later, Bobbi waddles into his office. "Can I sit?"

"Of course. How are you feeling?" he asks her.

"So tired," she says. "It's hard to sleep when I'm this big. And even if I was asleep, I'm getting up five times a night to go to the loo... But I wanted to review my agendas for the next few months while I'm on maternity leave. Will has everything covered, but I wanted to make sure you didn't have any other questions."

"No. I think we're all set. This will be a big test for Will. He's great with the talent, but can he run the business?"

Bobbi smiles. "He'll be fine. And I'm only planning to be away for four months unless something goes horribly wrong."

"Take as long as you need. I'm sure Will will be fine, and I'll be right on top of it," Logan reassures her.

"I'll probably want to come back sooner. The thought of being home so long… Anyway, what else do you need?"

Logan pauses for a moment. _Just ask her. Yes, she's your colleague, but after all these years, she's your friend too._

"Can I ask you a personal question? About me?" he begins.

"Er… sure."

"Since I've been back in London… And it's been a few years… I haven't really dated anyone seriously."

"Well- do you want to date someone seriously?" she asks incredulously.

"Of course. If it's the right person. But… what I wanted to ask is… Do you think there is a reason why? Do you think it's something I give off? What I mean is-"

"Logan, you imbecile. I know what you're asking. If word was out that you wanted something other than a shag, women would be queuing up for a chance with you. But that's _not_ how you act."

 _What? Am I back to being the asshole I was before Rory? When did that happen?_

"Well… I'm ready. I think. I've been buried in the company for two years, and I need something different."

"Ooh," Bobbi squeals. "Let me set you up. Please."

He rolls his eyes, but smiles.

"Do you have a type, or…" she asks.

 _Yes. Witty. Intelligent. Blue eyes and freckles._

"Nope. I'm open to anyone."

"Let me think on it. I'll come back- oh, I know the perfect girl. I met her in prenatal yoga."

 _Woah. I want to be open-minded, but…_

"She's pregnant?" he asks.

"Oh, no, no, no. Sorry. The instructor. She's a little young, but such a doll. Can I give her your number?" she asks.

 _I guess this is what I have to do._

"Yes. Let's do this."

One week later, Logan meets Sienna for dinner. He approaches her outside the main door, knowing who she is from the selfie she had sent earlier that day.

He calls her name and as she turns toward him and smiles, he feels an instant attraction.

 _Off to the right start._

Logan likes her. She's young, only twenty-four, but she's grounded and interesting.

Mid-way through the meal, he pauses to look at her side of the table. She has ordered a wedge salad, dressing on the side, and an ice water with a cucumber slice.

He tries to ignore it, but he finally has to ask. "That's not all you're going to eat, is it?"

"Actually, yes. I'm teaching hot yoga at 5:30 in the morning, and I have to be very careful about any toxins going in my body right now."

He nods in understanding. _That sounds legit._ "Hot yoga? What's that all about?"

Dinner flies by, and he offers to walk her home. "Can I see you again?" he asks when they reach her walk-up.

"I would love that. I'll plan the next date." Sienna kisses him on the cheek and then turns to head inside.

The next few weeks are filled with all kinds of athletic dates: rock climbing, bike rides, even yoga. He likes her a lot. She's fun, she's a great kisser, and he's never been in better shape. But one thing niggles at him, no matter how hard he tries to push past it.

 _She eats like a rabbit. She never puts anything into her mouth without reading the labels. I know I shouldn't let it bother me, but it does._

 _I don't think she has a problem. She's so healthy, she has to eat more when I'm not around. I just love to eat out. I love trying new food. I love wine. It's really limiting on my interactions with her._

 _But that's stupid. I can't stop seeing her because we have different eating habits._

So he soldiers on, kayaking and paddle boarding his way through the relationship.

One night, he leaves work late and calls Sienna to see if he can stop by her place on the way home. He's been busy, and he hasn't spoken to her in days. She quickly agrees, so he picks up Chinese takeout for them both on the way to her flat.

When she lets him in the door, he kisses her on the lips and heads to the kitchen to drop the food down on the table.

"I don't know what you like, so I just got a little of everything," he says, pulling boxes out of the brown paper bag.

"Oh, I wish I'd've known," she says. "I already ate before you got here."

"No problem," Logan says, trying to keep his disappointment in check. _It's just food. It's not a big deal._ "Is it okay if I eat?"

"Of course. Go ahead. I want to show you that article about meditation I was telling you about. Let me just go grab it from my room," she says, leaving him alone in the kitchen.

He's starving so he digs in, only pausing to look for the packets of soy sauce that are nowhere to be found.

 _Maybe there's some in her refrigerator._

He opens the door to find several condiments, a bag of rice cakes, and a blender full of green smoothie.

"What are you looking for?" she asks as she re-enters the kitchen, handing him a magazine.

"Soy sauce," he says quietly.

"Ooh. Sorry. I don't use that."

He sits down to finish his meal, trying to concentrate on the article she gave him.

 _She doesn't eat real food. How can I keep going out with her?_

* * *

 **May 2013**

Logan gets out of a cab at Katherine's flat in Camden. After a month of wooing her, this is their fifth official date, and she's giving off the vibe that tonight is the night.

He feels like a teenager. He hasn't had sex in a while, and he likes this girl.

She's a columnist for Marie Claire UK, and while he is not her intended audience, she is such a gifted writer that he finds himself reading anything he finds of hers online. He had forgotten how attractive he found someone who could move him with written words.

She opens the door with a huge smile on her face. "Hi," she coos as he walks into her flat and hands her a bottle of wine. "Thank you. This will be perfect."

"Smells great in here. What are you cooking?" he asks.

"I'm not great in the kitchen, but my mum is. She walked me through this, and I hope it will be good. It's a typical English meal for my American boyfriend."

 _Boyfriend?_

His face must register surprise because Katherine quickly backtracks. "Not 'boyfriend', just the bloke I'm-"

"Katherine. It's fine," he interrupts pulling her close and kissing her forehead. "Tell me about this English meal…"

After they finish eating, they head to the couch with the rest of the wine, and Logan makes his move. After a few minutes, she stands up and pulls him towards her bedroom.

"Are you sure?" Logan asks.

"Yes. Come on."

Things escalate quickly, and Logan tries to mentally slow down _. The first time is important. I don't want to rush._

But Katherine obviously has other ideas as she skips the foreplay and pulls him on top of her, quickly sliding a condom on him. He is inside her before he realizes it's happening.

 _Yeah. This'll work too._

He slowly begins to move, trying to figure out his pacing from her, but she's not giving him much to work with. Her eyes are closed, and she is silent.

"You okay?" he whispers.

She murmurs "Um-hm."

 _Alright. I'll just keep doing what I'm doing. Works for me._

But he quickly finds that it's _not_ working for him. _I need her to participate._

"Do you wanna… switch up? Or…"

"No. It's great," she says. "Keep going."

A few minutes later, her mouth falls open, and he has to assume she's coming. _Unless she's faking it. Is she faking?_

Her eyes finally open, and she smiles at him. He finishes too and rolls off of her.

She cuddles up and whispers "Wow."

 _Um, no. That was… awkward._

 _But it's the first time. It's bound to be awkward until we figure each other out. No big deal._

"Yeah," he agrees.

He tries again the next morning, but she brushes off his advances. _Maybe it was terrible for her too, and she doesn't want a repeat performance. I'm just going to have actually 'wow' her next time._

* * *

A few days later, Katherine meets him and several of his co-workers at the pub under his office for happy hour. After a pint, she whispers "Let's go home." into his ear.

 _She doesn't need to tell me twice. I've got to prove to her that I'm better in bed than what happened last weekend._

When they get to his flat, she again rushes through the foreplay. But this time, he deliberately slows her down. He leads her up the stairs and lays her down on his bed. He slowly takes off her clothes and kisses down her collarbone towards her breast. She is starting to squirm slightly underneath him.

 _Better._

After a moment, he leaves her breasts and kisses down her stomach towards her pelvis. When he places an open-mouthed kiss on her inner thigh, she twitches so hard that she actually sits up.

"You okay?" he asks, smirking.

"No, Logan… I don't…"

 _Oh, shit. She's serious. That wasn't good squirming._

"I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to-" he begins.

"No, I'm sorry. I just… I don't do that," Katherine explains.

He is slightly confused, so he asks for clarification. "You don't do what?"

She is now blushing furiously. "Oral sex. I don't do that."

 _What the…_

"Oh."

"Is that a problem?" she asks quietly.

"No. Of course not. We don't have to do anything you don't want to do," Logan reassures her.

She smiles brightly and pulls him back down onto her. "Good. Because we can do this." She quickly pulls him inside her and closes her eyes.

 _Okay. Silent missionary is what she's comfortable with. I have to respect that._

He moves against her, trying to follow her cues, but… _it's hard when she's just lying here._

 _And I'm not getting a blow job in the near future. Fuck. I'm going to miss that._

His mind is drifting, and his libido is slipping.

 _What if I can't come? Can_ _ **I**_ _fake it? Won't she know? I just need to… think about something sexy._

Suddenly, before he can even stop the memory, he thinks about the best blow job he ever had.

He and Rory had been at the house in Martha's Vineyard for Labor Day weekend 2005. They had been innocently kissing on the back deck while the fireworks went off over their heads. Out of nowhere, Rory had unbuttoned his jeans and gone down on him.

 _She was just… constantly surprising me. She made me moan so loud out there, I'm sure everyone on the beach could hear me over the boom of the fireworks. And the way she would use her tongue to-_

He groans as he suddenly comes into Katherine.

 _Shit. Did she…_

He shakes his head attempting to focus on the girl he is _actually_ having sex with. She is smiling and her eyes are open wide. _So she must have come._

She snuggles against him, soon drifting off to sleep.

But Logan is awake for a while thinking through his dilemma. _I wonder what the deal is. I don't want to be insensitive if there is some issue. Maybe she'll talk to me about it._

 _Of course everyone has their own comfort level with stuff. But I'm not talking threesomes… or anal… or anything that out of the norm._

 _I just really like oral sex. Both ways._

 _I'm going to constantly be thinking of Rory again… That will be great for me._

 _But man… she gave the best blow jobs._

 _Am I shallow enough that I would break up with a girl I really like because the sex is just meh?_

 _No. I'm not going to be that shallow. I'll just keep working at it. And it's not the most important part of a relationship anyway._

 _Fuck…_

* * *

Three weeks later, he and Katherine are making the rounds at an Oxfam benefit.

"Can we step outside for a minute?" she asks.

"Yeah, sure," he says grabbing two glasses of wine as he leads her out of the ballroom. "You hanging in there?" he teases.

"Yes. But you just know… _everyone_. It's exhausting."

He sighs. "Life of a Huntzberger. Or I guess dating a Huntzberger. You're doing great."

"Logan."

He looks up to see Odette Marchand on the patio, smoking a cigarette.

"Hey! I thought you were going to quit those," he chastises.

"I know, I know. It's these events. Smoking is an excellent reason to duck outside," Odette says.

"Odette, this is Katherine James. She's a writer at Marie Claire. This is Odette Marchand. Her father is on the board with me at Huntzberger."

Katherine drops his hand in order to shake Odette's. They smile at each other and make some small talk, before Katherine sees her editor and heads back inside.

"She's nice," Odette says after Katherine is gone.

"She is."

"How long have you been seeing her?"

"Um," Logan pauses, thinking. "A few months."

Odette eyes him suspiciously. "What's wrong with her?"

"Nothing. She's great."

Odette continues to stare him down.

"Really," he insists.

Her eyebrows raise.

Logan looks down at his shoes, then reconnects with Odette's gaze. "We're a little incompatible… the chemistry is not…"

"What do you mean? How?"

"I'm not gonna…" Logan trails off. "It's not your business."

"Fair enough. Maybe it will get better. If you really like her."

"Yeah, I do. And it will. I shouldn't have even said anything. I'm going to go find her. You want to come back inside?" he asks her.

"No. Cigarette," she says, pulling it up and inhaling.

Logan smiles and turns to leave. Three steps away, he pivots back toward her.

She laughs. "Are you doing everything _you_ should be doing?"

"I would love to do anything she would let me. But she doesn't want me to do anything. It's like... she's only doing it to get it over with as quickly as possible. And she won't talk about it. I've been trying for weeks."

 _Oh my God. Shut up. This is not something I should be talking to her about._

But he can't stop now that his confession is flowing. "Is it me? Is she not attracted to me? That's stupid. Of course she's attracted to me. What do you think?"

Odette rolls her eyes in response.

"I can't believe I'm talking to you about this. We're not even… Are we friends?" he asks.

"No. We are definitely not friends. But I will say… Maybe you should keep trying to talk to her about it. Instead of pretending it's no big deal. Because sex is a big deal," Odette tells him.

"Yeah, I know... I'm going to head in. I guess I'll see you at the next one of these things?" he asks.

"Probably. See you in a few months."

He smiles, and heads back in to find Katherine. He spots her, sneaks up, and pulls her away out into the hallway. He kisses her deep, surprising her.

"Logan!" she squeals. "What are you doing? Your parents are in the other room."

"That's what makes it hot, right?" he asks with a smile.

"Come on, babe. We can't… we can't do this here."

Logan sighs, louder than he intends.

"Don't be mad," she pleads.

"I'm not… mad. Just… You're attracted to me, right?"

 _Wow. I sound really unconfident. What the hell is wrong with me?_

"Of course. Why would you even ask me that?" she asks incredulously.

"You don't seem to really enjoy… physical interaction with me."

"Is this because I don't give blow-jobs? You said that wasn't a big deal," she reminds him.

 _Am I being an asshole?_

"No, it's not about that," he lies. "I'm sorry. Let's just go back in, get through the raffle, and then we'll go. Sound good?"

"Yes," she says smiling. "You're sure we're okay?"

He nods, and she kisses him sweetly.

Later that night, he fantasizes about Rory again while he sleeps with Katherine. This is becoming a recurring theme.

 _I never had to question if she was attracted to me._ _At the beginning,_ _ **she**_ _pulled_ _ **me**_ _away from her grandparent's vow renewal just to show me how much she wanted me._

His mind wanders to what he wishes would have happened that night if Lorelei hadn't walked in. He feels guilty when he comes, and he begins to wonder how long he can keep this up.

 _She doesn't like sex. How can I keep going out with her?_

* * *

 **August 2013**

"I'll hit the bar. You scope out a good spot," Logan shouts at Will above the thump of the deejay. He heads toward the bar and eases his way in. Someone bumps him from behind, and he careens into the patron in front of him.

"Sorry," he yells. "My bad…" Logan trails off as she turns around. With her caramel skin, golden eyes, and dark curly hair, she is the most striking woman Logan has ever seen in real life.

He smiles his biggest smile and hones in. "I'm so sorry, I got bumped from behind. Can I make it up to you? Buy your drink?"

Her lips twitch at the obvious come-on.

"Although you may have to physically buy it since you are the closer one to the bar," he continues. "And you won't have any trouble getting his attention."

She rolls her eyes, but says "What do you want?"

"Macallan, neat. Vodka tonic… for my buddy. And whatever you want," he says, handing over a fifty-pound note.

"You're cute," she says.

"Thanks. You're… just okay."

She busts into laughter, then turns toward the bar, where she quickly attracts the bartender.

 _She is fucking hot. This is why I'm out tonight. Get drunk, flirt, get my game back. Now that I'm finally done with Katherine, I need a break from finding a girlfriend and get back to having a little fun._

A moment later, she begins handing back his drinks. "Thank you," she says, walking past him holding two martinis. His eyes follow her long legs in her short skirt.

"No, no, no. What's your name?" he asks as he follows. _No way am I letting this woman walk away from me._

She stops and looks at him carefully. "You don't know my name?"

His brow furrows. "Am I supposed to? You didn't tell me, did you?" he continues, following her away from the bar. "You have thrown me a little with… I mean, you must know how gorgeous you are."

"I'm Brittany," she smiles. "Come with me. Get your mate."

He grabs Will and follows her into a roped-off VIP section. He settles in next to her on a velvet couch. Thirty minutes of flirty conversation quickly escalates into making out like horny teenagers in a dark movie theater. After months of tepid interactions with Katherine, Logan is bursting with passion.

"You want to get out of here?" he whispers against her jawline.

"Yes," she whispers back, her voice ragged. "Let me tell my girls I'm going."

Logan darts over to Will, who is occupied with a woman of his own, to let him know he's leaving before quickly following Brittany down the stairs and towards the exit.

"My flat is close. We can walk. But I should warn you... there may be cameras outside," she tells him.

"Why would there be cameras?" he asks as he steps into the dark night and is immediately greeted by the bright flash of cameras.

"Brittany! Brittany!"

Logan glances around like a deer in the proverbial headlights. Brittany tucks her arm in his and pulls him down the street.

"Brittany! Who's the guy?"

"Just keep walking," she whispers as they hurry along. Three blocks later, they reach her building and the doorman lets them in.

"What the hell was that?" Logan asks once in the elevator. "Are you famous or something?"

"Not really. But… a little. I'm a model."

Logan smirks. "Yeah, I can see that working for you."

She smiles. "I should've said something, but I liked you not knowing who I am. But now... You may be in the papers tomorrow. 'Brittany and mystery man.'"

"It wouldn't be too hard to figure out who I am," Logan tells her.

"What- are _you_ famous?"

"No, not at all. But I'm fairly well-known in the business world. I was interviewed in The Economist last month," he brags.

"The what?"

"Forget it," he laughs. "Let's just be kissing again."

* * *

Later that night after they have sex for the second time, Brittany gets quiet.

"What are you thinking?" he asks her.

"I'm thinking... I never do stuff like this because I'm constantly worried some fuckweasel is going to sell the story to the tabloids. Or take a picture of me naked and Instagram it. I'm just wondering if I've made a big mistake tonight."

He pulls her close and kisses her collarbone. "Come on. You know this has not been a mistake. Sex this good could never be called a mistake. Besides, I have plenty of money. And I'm not on Instagram."

"Okay, fine. But do you respect me?"

"Sure. Do you respect me?"

"Come on," she responds. "It's different for women. Which is stupid. But it just is."

Details from the thesis of Rory's women's studies final come to him.

"I don't subscribe to that kind of patriarchy. So we slept together the first night. So what? Why is that any different than if we had gone on three dates and then slept together?" he asks.

She smiles timidly.

"Look," he continues. "If it makes you feel better, I'll sleep with you after our third date too."

They snuggle close before falling asleep. The next morning they find pictures of their rendezvous online, so he holes up in her apartment for the rest of the weekend until they are sure the paparazzi are gone from the sidewalk in front of her building.

 _Maybe this isn't a one night stand. Maybe this will just be a relationship that happens organically, instead of me looking to force something that isn't there._

* * *

 **October 2013**

Will and Rowan knock on Logan's office door on a Friday afternoon. "What are you up to tonight?" Will asks him.

Logan looks up from his monitor. "I'm supposed to meet up with Brittany. But she has a shoot this afternoon, so I don't know. Those things never run on time."

"Who's Brittany?" Rowan asks.

Will smiles. "Logan is dating Brittany Snover."

"Should I know who that is?" Rowan asks.

"You do know who she is. Here. Look," Will says as he pulls out his phone and looks up pictures of Brittany.

"Please tell me you are not looking at pictures of my girl in her underwear," Logan begs.

"No. We are not doing that," Will smirks.

"Uh, right. She's in a _bikini_ here," Rowan clarifies. "But I definitely know who she is."

"Guys…"

"Is she like your girlfriend now?" Will asks.

"We haven't really labeled anything yet," Logan says. "But I like her. She's fun. And obviously, she's hot."

"Okay, well we'll be out tonight if you decide you want to go out."

"Thanks, guys. But don't count on me."

Logan texts Brittany, checking the status of her shoot, and reminding her that he is cooking dinner for her in his apartment that night.

She shows up forty minutes late, rushing through the door, pulling Logan from the stove, and kissing him passionately.

"So sorry, darling. You know how these people cannot stay on time."

Logan laughs. "I know _you_ can't be on time either. But it's fine. Grab a glass of wine, and I'll put everything on the table."

They are working their way through dessert, when Brittany comments "I've been thinking about your idea of a youtube channel. I'm just not sure what I'm passionate about."

"You could stick with your industry. You know make-up stuff or… fitness tips... or how to make your skin so soft, your man can't keep his hands off of you," Logan says laughing, as he pulls her out of her chair and onto the couch, so he can in fact put his hands on her.

"Is that too frivolous?" she asks.

"No. It's on brand. But if you want to do something more serious, go for it. I can help you. You can talk about politics or… what you're reading or… I know. Since your dad is Somalian, you can talk about the famine there."

Her eyes glaze over.

"I'm just thinking these things up on the fly. We'll find something you care about. But I do think it's a good business move, even if it is about something frivolous. We don't have to decide tonight," he says as he pulls her into his lap.

* * *

Logan awakens the next morning to find Brittany still asleep. He watches her for a moment, contemplating what the last three months with her have been.

 _I'm obviously very attracted to her. And it's strangely exhilarating that she's famous. She's fun, and... I can see this going somewhere._

"Are you watching me sleep?" she murmurs.

"Mm-hmm. You are too beautiful to take my eyes off of."

"You're so corny. I have to wake up. I need to do cardio today," she says.

"Get up. I'll run with you."

They head out to Hyde Park to the paths that Logan is so familiar with. He is faster, but her long legs give her a longer stride. They push each other to the finish, and he realizes how fun it is to have a running buddy again.

 _And she's infinitely more likable than Robert._

Back in his apartment, Logan gets them both bottles of water. He hears Brittany call to him from the living room.

"Are you reading this?"

 _Shit. I didn't mean to leave that out._

He walks into the living room and hands her the water.

"Are you reading Pride and Prejudice?" she asks again.

 _Yes. I read it every year on Rory's birthday. Although I now have it basically memorized so I can skim it pretty quickly._

"No. The cleaning lady must have accidentally moved it when she was here," he lies.

"There are pages dog-eared," she accuses.

 _Yes. The first is Darcy's horrible proposal, and the second is when Elizabeth changes her mind and they get engaged. Those are the parts I read more than once a year._

 _Logan Huntzberger. Keeping hope alive since 2007._

"There's a note in here," she says, pulling the single piece of paper out of the book. "Who's Rory?"

"Umm... it's not my book... I don't... I mean, I've read it before, but..." Logan stammers, grabbing the note and the book from her.

"I saw the movie," Brittany chimes in, letting him off the hook.

 _BBC miniseries or 2005 movie adaptation? Very different experiences._

"I love Keira Knightley," she continues.

 _Oof._

"But you've read it?" he asks. When she shakes her head no, his eyes widen. "You should. It's a classic."

"I don't really like to read," she says. Looking up at his bookshelves that are filled to overflowing, she adds "I probably shouldn't tell you that."

He is shocked at how much this disturbs him. "You don't read books at all?"

"Nope. Why would I do that when there are so many other things I could be doing? I guess it's a good thing you only like me for my looks," she laughs as she pulls him up the stairs. "Let's take a shower."

They spend the rest of the weekend together, and everything seems great, but Logan knows it's almost over.

 _I am not that superficial. I like more about her than her looks._

 _Don't I?_

He stays with her for another month, but he can't get past her lack of intellectual curiosity.

 _She doesn't read. How can I keep going out with her?_

* * *

A/N: I know we all hate Logan with other women, but as I've said before, a man that handsome is not celibate. The key here is that he is subconsciously still comparing them all to Rory. And fairly or unfairly, they're not measuring up.

The note from Rory in Pride and Prejudice is detailed in my previous story London Baby, Chapter 3 if you need a refresher!


	8. 2014

Author Note: Here we are in 2014- so close to the good stuff! Thank you all so much for the alerts, comments, etc... It really motivates me to keep getting these out.

I do not own any characters.

* * *

 **March 2014**

"So how's everything in London? Work's good? Are you… seeing anybody?" Stephanie interrogates him as she hands him the baby.

Logan laughs. "Subtle, Steph. Uh... Work is great. Really busy. And London is still awesome. And I'm dating, but nobody serious… Hey there. Hey. Is Mama always so nosy? Yes, she is," he coos at Harper.

"I'm not being nosy," Stephanie says, sitting down next to him. "I just care about you, and I want you to be happy."

"I am happy. Honestly. And I'm trying to find someone. It's just not working out so far. It's like…" He pauses to think. "It's like that milkmaid from Amsterdam. Everything seems perfect, and then three weeks in, you realize you don't speak the same language."

"Milkmaid? What are you talking about?" she asks.

Logan glances over at Colin, whose eyes are wide. "Yeah, Logan. What are you talking about?"

 _Okay. I guess that secret has not been shared._

"Uh… never mind. Stupid analogy. But basically, nothing is working out for me in the long run. I meet someone, think she's great, and after a few months, there is something that I can't stand. I'm not trying to be picky… These are just… deal-breakers," Logan elaborates.

"Maybe you should look at someone that you're already friends with," Stephanie says. "That way you already know your personalities mesh. Like Colin and me. We were friends first."

Logan smirks as he bounces the baby on his lap.

"For the record, I never wanted to be your friend," Colin says.

"But we _were_ friends," Stephanie argues.

"Not by his choice," Logan says, giving her a knowing look. "Besides, I don't know if that will work for me. I don't get friend-zoned like Colin does."

"Hey, fuck you, Logan!" Colin stands up in faux anger. "Give me my baby, you stupid… handsome… jerk-off."

"Language, Colin," Logan admonishes, as he hands Harper back to Colin. Colin awkwardly holds her over his shoulder, and stomps back to his chair to sit down with her.

 _I will never get used to seeing Colin hold a baby._

"Think about it, Logan," Stephanie says. "A friend first."

So he thinks about it.

* * *

"Hey! I'm sorry I'm late… I didn't think you would be here yet. You've never been on time for anything a day in your life!" Logan tells Finn as he enters Sarabeth's Kitchen and finds him waiting.

"I know. But Andy is always on time. This is Andy," Finn responds, introducing the man to his right.

"Nice to meet you," Logan says, shaking his hand.

 _Who is this guy?_

He follows the hostess to a table, and the three men get settled.

"How long are you here for?" Finn asks.

"Quick trip. I got here Sunday night, had meetings all day yesterday and today, and then I have a redeye tonight. I did manage to get to Colin's last night to see Harper, but otherwise, I've been working."

"He's still so awkward holding the baby," Andy says, causing Finn to laugh.

Logan's eyebrows raise. _Who_ _ **is**_ _this guy?_

"Andy, what do you do, where do you live, how do you fit here?" Logan asks. After a pause, he continues. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to sound rude."

"No, no. I'm the one crashing your dinner. I'm a broker. I live in Battery Park."

"Is that how you guys know each other?" Logan asks, knowing Finn has just moved there.

"Yes," Finn says. "Actually… we live _together_ in Battery Park." He puts his hand over the top of Andy's, and they both smile at him.

 _Oh._

 _Oh._

 _But… Finn has probably slept with more women than me._

"So… you're gay?" Logan asks.

"I don't really label myself, mate," Finn says. "I'm an equal opportunity lover."

"I'm gay," Andy offers.

"Hmph… So how long have you guys been together?" Logan asks, his mind reeling.

"About a year," Andy says. "I was his financial advisor, and we talked on the phone for months before we ever had a face-to-face. But once that happened… I quit being his broker, and the rest is history."

"Well, congratulations, then. I'm happy for you," Logan says perfunctorily.

 _I can't believe this has been going on for a year, and Finn never told me._

He's more hurt than he cares to admit.

They order food, making small talk as Logan and Andy get to know each other. Logan knows he is being stiff, but he can't snap out of it. Midway through the meal, Andy excuses himself to take a phone call, leaving Logan and Finn awkwardly looking at each other across the table.

"So… I know this probably sounds strange-"

"That's… that's really not the issue. I just can't believe it took you so long to tell me. Did you think I wouldn't be okay with it? You obviously told Colin since Andy's met the baby," Logan says.

"Logan… Colin's always known. He caught me with a guy when we lived together in college. I never told _you_ , because it was just sex… I always assumed _if_ I ever settled down, it would be with a woman. This was never part of the plan. Actually, you know me... committing to anyone was never part of my plan. So I didn't _not_ tell you… for any reason other than that."

 _They've both kept this from me for years._

"So you've always been into guys?" Logan asks.

"Yeah."

"But you've been with so many women," Logan says. "And, unfortunately, I've actually seen it. You weren't faking."

"I think we've established that my promiscuity knows no bounds. I find all kinds of people attractive," Finn explains.

A few moments of silence pass as Logan thinks all of this over.

"You know that I don't care at all, right? I mean… as long as you're happy, I'm happy."

"Yeah, I know," Finn says. "I'm sorry I kept it from you."

"I'm sorry you felt like you couldn't tell me."

They are quiet for another minute.

"So… that time you kissed me in Amsterdam…" Logan says. "I just thought it was all the ecstasy."

Finn smirks. "Oh, it was. But you know how pretty you are, Logan."

Logan laughs just as Andy returns to the table. He sees them laughing and asks "Everything cool?"

Logan nods. "Absolutely. Everything's cool."

He watches Andy push Finn's long hair behind his ear, their easy chemistry belying a comfortable relationship. Logan feels odd pangs of jealousy.

Later that night as he settles into his flight, he looks back on his quick trip.

 _Colin is married with a kid, Finn has been in a committed relationship for a year, and I can't seem to get anyone past three months._

 _This is fucked up. What am I doing wrong? How can I not find someone who I can at least tolerate? Maybe Stephanie has the right idea. Look at someone as a friend first._

* * *

 **April 2014**

 **Are you coming in town this weekend for the literacy event?**

Logan sends a quick text to Odette before moving on with his day, unable to check his phone for a few hours. Between meetings, he sees this notification.

 **Yes. I'm going to stay next week to spend some time with Papa. Will you be there?**

He smiles.

 **Meet you on the terrace halfway through?**

She texts back a smiley-faced emoji, and Logan is pleased.

 _At least I'll have someone to talk to at this thing._

* * *

True to his word, he finds Odette in the garden of Drapers' Hall. She is leaning against the building with her eyes closed.

"No cigarettes?" he asks, condescendingly.

She opens her eyes and smiles at him, pushing away from the wall. "Not allowed to smoke out here. And… I'm trying to quit."

Logan smirks. "Good call. How've you been?"

"Eh… Bien. Fine. I guess. Work is… fine. Henri and I broke up again. Probably for good. Mamá is driving me crazy trying to fix me up."

"So… You're not fine. Is that a more appropriate answer?" Logan asks.

She gives him a tight smile.

"Come on. Let's get a drink." He throws his arm around her shoulder and escorts her back into the main event, stopping at the bar for wine.

They spend the rest of the evening in each other's company. He finds that when she's not sardonic, she has a biting wit that makes him laugh. He feels a vague attraction that he pushes to the back of his mind.

 _I cannot hook up with someone who has Shira's approval._

But when it is time to part, he can't stop himself from asking "How long are you in town for?"

"It's open-ended," Odette replies.

"So I know that we aren't friends, and we don't like each other…" He pauses as she smiles at him. "But I have to go to a wedding next weekend. Do you think… maybe you want to come with me?" he asks.

She pulls an exaggerated sigh. "Who is it? How boring will it be?"

"It's one of our writers. He's old, so normally it would be very boring, but this is wife number three, and she's young. Very young. Like too young for _me_ to marry. We can ridicule the whole affair all night."

"So you want to bring me in for the comic relief?"

Logan smiles so big his eyes crinkle. "What do you say?"

"Fine," she agrees, rolling her eyes. "But I expect a lot of champagne. And decent caviar."

"I'm sure it won't be a problem," Logan tells her.

They text off and on through the week but he doesn't see her again until he picks her up on Saturday night. She is in a pale pink strappy dress, and again, Logan feels an attraction.

 _I cannot let this happen._

"You look beautiful," he tells her sincerely.

"So do you," she replies.

He shakes off these feelings, determined to rid the evening of any complications.

But later that night, after a few glasses of champagne, he finds himself pulling her close on the dance floor and whispering into her ear. "I think we're friends now, right?"

"Eh…"

"Come on! You have to give in at some point. Just admit it. You like me."

"You're okay. You're… better than okay. But Mamá constantly talks about you like you're... comme le Messie, and I can't let her think she's right," Odette sighs.

He twirls her around the floor. "I'm not trying to marry you. I just want you to admit that we're friends."

She rolls her eyes emphatically. "Okay… okay."

"Was that so hard?" he teases. "Now that we've established that we like each other, we can do all of these silly events together. I hate finding a date that I have to babysit all night, and you can tell your mother that you don't need any escorts."

"So I'll be a nifty back-up plan for you. That sounds lovely."

"Not a back-up plan. Just… a plan," Logan appeases.

She rolls her eyes and smiles. "Merde. I'm going to regret admitting that we're friends. I can already tell."

The champagne continues to flow and a few hours later, too drunk to drive, they leave his car behind and get into the back of a taxi.

"Two stops," he tells the driver.

"Just one stop," Odette clarifies.

He raises his eyebrows and catches her eye.

She grins. "Friends. With benefits. That's the expression, right?"

* * *

 **November 2014**

Logan dries the silverware Honor hands him as he listens to her ramble on about Shira's latest machinations.

"Why do you let her interfere in your life so much?" he finally interrupts her.

"I know. It's like Brokeback Mountain. I just can't quit her. But… now that we're alone… How is everything? Are you seeing anyone?"

"No wonder you can't quit her, Honor. You're just like her. You know- that was the first thing she asked me when I got here. Not 'Happy Thanksgiving" but 'Are you dating anyone?'"

"Stop it! I am not like her. I am in here washing my own dishes! When do you think is the last time _she_ washed her own dishes? Besides, she's only asking so that she can tell Hartford society. I'm asking because I love you," Honor says.

"Okay. Sorry. I'm not really seeing anyone."

"What about Odette Marchand?" she asks, not looking up from the sink.

"What about her?"

"It seems like you see her a good bit. Your picture has been in the paper together, and Dad told Mom that-"

"Yeah. I do see her some, but… she lives in Paris, and we're really just friends," Logan clarifies.

"Just friends?" Honor presses.

"How much do you want to know, Honor?" he asks, exasperated. "We're basically friends, who sleep together on occasion when we're bored, but it's not more than that."

"Okay. I'm not trying to hound you. I just want you settled. I see how you are with my kids, and I don't want you to wait too late."

"Um, you're four years older than me," he says pointing to her pregnant belly.

"You know this was not planned. I wanted all my babies done by the time I was thirty-five, and you're not too far from that," she says. "You still need to meet someone, date them for a while, get engaged, and be married for a bit. All before you really start thinking about children."

He says nothing, continuing to take dishes and dry them, ignoring Honor's stare.

"And honestly, 'friends who sleep together sometimes'… that's basically what a marriage is," she continues.

 _That's depressing._

"I get that it's hard to listen to me. I met the one when I was twenty-two, and I know that makes me lucky."

 _I met the one when I was twenty-two too._

"And in no way am I advocating for you to settle. It just seems like this is the first woman in a while who you've stuck with for longer than a month," she continues to ramble. "And I understand if you're just friends. But maybe you should look at it in a different light. See if there's more there."

He gives her a tight smile. "I'll take it under advisement."

 _Of course I've already thought about this. I thought about this a lot after Stephanie talked to me about being friends with someone first. And when we started sleeping together, it only made sense to evaluate if it was more. But it's not._

 _As it turns out, everything is great with us… Precisely because we only see each other every month or so. She's artistic and moody, and I'm focused and scheduled. We would drive each other nuts if we actually tried to date._

 _As Odette says, why would we mess with what's working? We know pushing it any further will break it completely. And with our two families so intertwined, there is no need for an awkward break-up to hang over us for the foreseeable future._

"I'm sorry for intruding," Honor says, drying her hands and hugging him. "I just want the best for you."

"I know."

They head back into the living room where Josh is watching football with Mitchum and Aiden. Shira is attempting to play dolls with Elizabeth. ("Gammy! I'm watching this game with Daddy!")

Logan watches from the doorway, and he knows Honor is right. This is what he wants. He just doesn't know how to get there.

* * *

 **December 2014**

On Christmas morning, Logan leaves his hotel room in the city and begrudgingly heads towards the house in Hartford.

 _I hate that I have to be here. But I had so many lonely Christmases in this house, and I don't want that for Honor's kids. I want their holidays to be light and fun. And not attended by staff._

After presents are exchanged and the meal is cleared, Mitchum asks Logan to join him for a drink.

"Dad, I really don't want to talk about work today. I need a break. You need a break too," Logan tells his father following him to his study.

"I'm not talking about work. I just want to have quick conversation with you. Without your mother around."

Logan closes the door to Mitchum's study and whirls around. "Are you divorcing her?"

"What? No. Divorce costs a fortune, son. Remember that. I would never divorce her. But- this _is_ along those lines… I need you to think about settling down with a woman, Logan. I need you to consider getting married."

"What? What are you talking about?" Logan asks, incredulously.

"You are out there as the face of the company. Making deals. Building goodwill. A man in his thirties needs to be married. It doesn't look right for you to be running around with young women anymore."

"Oh, but it's okay for a married sixty year-old to do so?" Logan asks sarcastically.

"Watch it," Mitchum says, staring him down. "I'm not joking. I know that you are serious professionally. I just need you to look serious… personally… Look, I'm not saying you need to give up your life. As long as you can be discreet, nothing has to change. We just need you to look the part."

"Dad, I'm not just gonna marry some girl you choose for me."

"Trust me. I know. I lost the ability to make you do things a long time ago. But… I've been talking to Jean Marchand-"

"Jesus Christ. Did you guys all get together and plan this little intervention?"

Mitchum furrows his brow. "I don't know what you're on about, but Jean and I have noticed how you and Odette gravitate toward each other, and… well, it's obviously a suitable match. You like each other, the financials work…"

"Dad. This is not-"

"Oh, I know you want to marry 'for love'," Mitchum mocks him, making air quotes. "And I've given you space to do that. More than I probably should have. But you need to face reality. The older you get, the less probable that is. It's time to make a responsible financial decision."

"This is a ridiculous conversation. Odette and I do not want to get married. Yes, we like each other, but it's not more than that. And we've both had the real thing. We know the difference," Logan argues.

He looks down sheepishly, feeling Mitchum's eyes on him.

 _I can't believe I just handed him that grenade._

"This is still about Rory Gilmore. My God, son. This is pathetic, even by your standards. Get your shit together, and start thinking about this family's financial future."

Mitchum strides by him and out of the room. Logan sinks down into an armchair, hating to be left alone with his thoughts.

 _I hope this isn't about Rory. But I don't even know anymore._

 _Maybe I am pathetic._

 _Maybe I should marry Odette. Or someone like her. Just get it done. The last 8 years have proven I'm not really going to be happy again._

 _I want to have kids and a family, and maybe Honor's right. I'm thirty-two. I don't want to be a dad so old that I can't play with my kids._

He pours himself another glass of scotch and spends a few moments contemplating his life before heading back out to join the others.

He runs into Josh in the kitchen.

"Hey, man. I need to ask you something."

"Yeah me, too," Josh replies. "You go first."

"How did you know Honor was the person you wanted to marry?"

"Oh. That's heavy. Uh… I just knew that I would never find anyone better than her. I was lucky she ever looked my way."

 _That's not helpful. At this point, Odette_ _ **does**_ _seem to be the best I can find._

"Wait- that sounds bad. I really love your sister. So much. So... that too... Sorry. I'm not good at those kind of questions," Josh continues rambling.

 _I know this about Josh. Why did I think he could give me any insight?_

"It's… whatever. What were you going to ask me?" Logan asks.

"Oh. Do you think anyone would notice if I got high in your old bedroom? Your parents are killing me today."

 _Yeah. You and me both._

"Probably not. You got an extra joint for me?"

* * *

A/N: I hope you guys like this.

To me, Finn has always seemed bi. He wears eyeliner very well, and he was constantly flirting with Logan.

The next couple of years are obviously going to stretch into really long chapters so please bear with me as I finish them up and get them to you. Let me know your thoughts in the comments!


	9. 2015

Author Note: 2015! It's long. Sorry.

Two things: One- Some of this may veer toward M. I tried to keep it clean, but I just couldn't. If that's not your thing, skip through it.

Two- In my mind, Logan's apartment looks like this. Downstairs- kitchen with breakfast/eating area. Keeping room used as a study- leather chairs and books. Guest bedroom. Bathroom. Upstairs- The master bed/bath and living room we see on the show plus another guest room.

I do not own anything. All characters belong to Gilmore Girls.

* * *

 **February 2015**

Logan attempts to read the same paragraph for the third time, but his eyes keep closing, the hum of the airplane lulling him to sleep.

 _It was probably a stupid idea to fly to Paris for thirty-six hours. But I hadn't seen Odette in two months, and I have to start making more of an effort if I am going to take this relationship seriously._

 _And we had fun together. We always do._

 _I still like her a lot. Just not enough to blow off work… or my friends… or really prioritize her in any way. That's not really fair to her, but she seems fine with the way things are._

 _But I know that I have to change if I want something different in life. So if quick trips to Paris mean I don't get to read the latest novel out of HPG, then that's what I have to do._

He finally gives up, closing his book and shutting his eyes.

* * *

 **May 2015**

A sharp rap on his open office door pulls Logan's eyes away from his monitor.

Jean Marchand stands smiling in his doorway. "Good morning, Logan."

"Good morning," Logan replies. "What brings you to this side of the building?"

"I understand you visited my daughter last weekend."

"Um. Yes, sir. I did," Logan stammers.

"This seems to be a regularly occurring thing," Jean says.

"Um…"

"It's good… It's good. That's not actually why I came in here. I wanted to speak to you about some opportunities I've discovered in Germany. Can we have dinner some night this week?"

Logan breathes a sigh of relief. He's not ready to discuss his relationship with Odette with her father. "Absolutely. I'm actually working on something in Germany right now as well."

"Parfait. I'll have my secretary call yours."

* * *

Two nights later, he meets Jean for dinner. The wine is already poured when he arrives.

"Logan. Sit. Have a glass."

"Thanks. I will," Logan responds as he settles in to the table.

"Tell me how things have been," Jean instructs him.

They small talk for a while, and Logan realizes he has been avoiding Jean for months.

 _But… I mean… I'm sleeping with his daughter. It definitely adds a layer of awkwardness to our working relationship._

Once they have ordered, Jean steers the conversation back to business.

"There are two small newspapers that I am looking to acquire just to get our foot in the door in Germany," he explains. "I have several German authors in my publishing house, but no newspapers."

"Okay," Logan says. "I defer to your judgement here. You're in charge of print on this side of the Atlantic."

"Excellent. I will send you the P and L's, but we will begin proceeding. What is your business in Germany?"

"Will Keating has discovered a Youtube channel that's generating a ton of traffic. It's a kid in Berlin who's rating the club scene and actually driving business to certain clubs. We're hoping to get the rights to his channel and really start advertising."

"I understand nothing of what you just said," Jean says smiling. "Other than Berlin. I know Berlin. Actually, one of these papers is there. The other is in Hamburg."

"I'm heading there next month to wine and dine this guy. Do you want me to stop in at the offices? See how things look?" Logan asks.

"Yes, actually that would be helpful. I know you don't have much to do with newspapers anymore, but it couldn't hurt to have a Huntzberger in the building. If it's not too much trouble of course."

"I'm sure I could fit an extra few days into my schedule. It's no problem," Logan says.

They eat in silence for a few minutes until Jean clears his throat and looks directly at Logan.

"There is one other thing I would like to discuss with you."

"Sure," Logan says.

"You have been dating Odette for a while now."

 _Oh God. Dating is probably not the word._

"Um… Yes…"

"Relax, Logan. Celine and I very much approve of you. I've recently spoken to your father, and I understand you are getting ready to propose."

 _What? That's not exactly… Shit._

Logan downs what is left in his wine glass, desperately trying to determine the right thing to say when Jean continues.

"I don't want to tell you how you should do it… A man must use his own words to convince the woman he loves to spend the rest of her life with him."

 _Wow. What the hell did Mitchum tell him? He thinks-_

"But… I do have something special that I know Odette wants."

Logan looks at him blankly, unable to believe how surreal this conversation has gotten. _It's one thing to talk hypothetically about this with Honor, but talking about it with her father is just… crazy._

Jean reaches into his jacket pocket and produces a maroon velvet box. As he opens it to Logan he says "This was her grand-mère's ring, and she has always said she wants it to be her wedding ring."

"Uh… I don't know what to say," Logan stammers.

"You don't have to say anything," Jean reassures him. "I trust you to keep Odette happy, and I know this will be a good start."

"But I-"

"No more. Take it," Jean orders.

Logan looks at the diamond carefully as takes the box. He closes it and puts it into his own pocket.

"Thank you," he says, unsure of what else he could say in this moment.

 _I guess there's no backing out now. I'm going to have to get married._

* * *

 **June 2015**

"It was definitely worth coming with you to Hamburg," Bobbi says to Logan and Will as they walk through the city. "I think that paper may be rubbish, but this city is lovely."

"The paper is only rubbish now," Logan counters. "Once we reorganize it, it will be as good as any other HPG paper."

"Yeah, but all papers are rubbish. I can't believe we still even deal with them," Will says.

"Old people have to get the news too, Will," Logan says laughing.

They continue their way to their dinner destination, all the while good-naturedly arguing about the need for print. Bobbi slows down a step and takes hold of Logan's forearm.

"Logan… Isn't that… Up there. Is that Rory? Your ex Rory?" she asks.

Logan furrows his eyebrows as he looks ahead.

 _Holy shit._

Somehow, in all the streets, in all the world, Rory Gilmore is walking right toward him.

"Fuck, mate. Do you wanna go the other way? Or…" Will's voice tapers off as Rory is no less than ten feet away.

Logan cannot move. His feet are rooted to the sidewalk as Rory walks toward him, oblivious.

About five feet away, she finally catches his eye. She too stops dead in her tracks.

"Logan." Her blue eyes are bigger than ever as she finally takes a step toward him. "What are you…? How are you _here_?" she asks incredulously.

"Hey… Rory. Um… work. We're working. We did work today."

 _What the fuck is wrong with me? Just be smooth and ignore the fact that she's broken your heart several times over._

He just stares for a moment, taking in the sight of her. He hasn't seen her in three years, but she is as beautiful as his memories. Her hair is shorter than he's seen it recently- more like the days when he first fell for her. But she is in a sophisticated shirt dress, a far cry from the jeans he remembers from college. _This is adult Rory…_

Someone jostles Logan from behind, and he finally snaps out of his trance. Taking her arm, he motions for them to move out of the way of the pedestrian traffic.

Logan can't stop watching her, afraid if he looks away, she won't really be there. He swallows hard and vows to act like this is no big deal.

 _Because it's_ _ **not**_ _a big deal. Yes, this is Rory, the love of your life, randomly in your path in a foreign city. But it's no big deal. For God's sake, pull it together._

"You remember Will and Bobbi?" he asks, motioning to his colleagues, still unable to break his eye contact with her.

"Of course. It's good to see you guys," Rory says, though her eyes never leave Logan's.

"So," he starts, continuing to watch her closely. "Why are you in Hamburg?"

"I'm writing an article about… You don't need all the details, but my subject was speaking here today, and I needed some more quotes and crowd reactions to her, and…" Rory says. She breaks into a big smile. "You look _great_."

 _This is a big fucking deal._

Logan breathes deeply before smiling back. "So do you. The red is working."

Will clears his throat behind him, reminding Logan that other people are witnessing this encounter.

"We're going to go get dinner," Bobbi says quickly. "Why don't you two catch up, and we'll just see you tomorrow, Logan."

Logan raises his eyebrows at Rory. "You busy, or you want to grab a bite?"

She smiles even brighter before saying "Nope. Not busy at all."

They say goodbye to Will and Bobbi who hurry away, leaving the former couple standing together in the sidewalk.

They smile for another moment before both talking at once.

"I actually just ate."

"I'm not that hungry."

They laugh in unison.

"Do you wanna walk? Go down to the river?" she asks.

"Lead the way."

The streets are busy at this time of day, and Logan finds himself reaching for her lower back, steering her through the throngs of people. They are crossing the street when a cyclist flies by them. Logan grabs Rory's hand and pulls her back just in time.

"Thanks," she sighs. "I wasn't paying attention."

Logan looks at their joined hands and reluctantly lets go.

Slowly, the shyness wears off, and they begin talking in earnest. He learns about her piece on Naomi Shropshire, and he tells her about the work he is doing at HPG. They discuss her apartment in Brooklyn and Honor's kids. The conversation is coming fast, the quips furious, and it doesn't feel like eight years have separated them.

When they finally reach the end of the sidewalk, Rory jokes. "Well this metaphor just kicks you in the gut."

"I know you're more of a simile girl, so this doesn't have to be the literal end," Logan says hopefully.

"No," she smiles. "We can just turn around and start right over."

 _Start right over? God. Please let_ _ **that**_ _be the metaphor._

"Keep going. You were saying that once Honor had Charlie…"

"Right," Logan continues. "So, once Honor had Charlie, she finally listened to Mom and got a nanny to help her. And what do you think happened next? Shira started undermining her and trying to get Honor to fire her."

"No!"

"We can't decide if she doesn't like someone else being important to the kids, or if it's her constant need to flaunt her status. I'm pretty sure that's the reason _I_ had a million nannies." Logan says.

"That sounds just like Grandma and her maids," Rory says.

"How are Richard and Emily? I haven't seen them since Grandpa's funeral. So maybe… four years?"

"They're great," Rory tells him. "Same as always. DAR and golf. She told me she saw you at that funeral. I was sorry to hear about your grandpa."

Logan smiles. "No, you weren't."

"Okay, I wasn't. But I felt bad for you."

"He had gotten so difficult and cranky toward the end… It was really for the best for everyone when he finally passed."

On that dour note, a few moments of silence pass, worrying Logan.

"Do you want to stop and get a drink?" he asks, before she can think of a reason to get away.

"Yes," she answers quickly.

 _Or maybe she doesn't want to get away._

Rory reaches for his hand, laces her fingers into his, and keeps walking.

Logan can't contain his smile. His eyes are crinkling at the corners; his dimples are showing. _I can't believe she's holding my hand. If someone had told me an hour ago that I would be walking down the Elbe holding hands with Rory Gilmore, I would have thought they were crazy._

They find a pub a few blocks up and head in. As they sit down at the corner of the bar, Logan is finally forced to let go of her hand.

"Scotch," he tells the bartender before looking to Rory. She holds up two fingers, causing Logan's eyebrows to shoot toward the ceiling.

"Really?" he asks.

"A lot has changed about me, Huntzberger. I'm not the girl you once knew who got drunk off of hunch punch and tequila."

He nods his approval, the smile spreading across his face, as the scotch is placed in front of them.

"How's Lorelei?" he asks.

"She's good. The Inn is doing well, and she's still with Luke. Not much has changed much with her, really."

 _Excellent. Let's not dwell on her since she hates me._

They work their way through a few rounds, Logan growing more and more confident as the night wears on.

 _I've missed feeling this comfortable with a woman. Maybe that's what it is about her that I can't shake. She makes me feel invincible._

 _And I can't let this be a one-off. I can't let these drinks be the end of this._

He's mentally trying to work out the most subtle way to get her back to his hotel room when she leans forward, placing her chin in her hand, and asks "Are you seeing anyone? Finn has been pretty tight-lipped about your love life."

His first feeling is joy. _She's asked Finn about my love life._

His second is guilt. _I haven't thought about Odette once in the two hours since I laid eyes on Rory._

She assumes his lack of response as an affirmative. "Oh… Is it…" Her eyes flick down for a moment before raising them to look at him. "Is it serious? Do you love her?"

 _How do I even explain Odette? She's a fuck buddy who I'm thinking about marrying so that I can seem like a well-adjusted adult? Surely there's a nicer explanation I can come up with._

She again takes his silence as referendum. "As much as you loved me?" she asks quietly.

Logan is shocked at her boldness. He has spent the last eight years fantasizing that Rory still harbored feelings for him. He had never thought it could actually be true.

"I'm sorry. Three drinks on an empty stomach. Just ignore that last… I… So… Colin and Stephanie have a baby? That's crazy," she rambles, as her face flushes to match her dress.

But he _can't_ ignore it. It repeats in his head over and over again.

" _As much as you loved me?"_

 _Fuck it. I'm going for it. This is fate._

He reaches up and touches her cheek. "Rory, I will _never_ love anyone as much as I loved you."

She melts into his hand, smiling. He pulls her face toward his and kisses her gently. She reaches for him, sliding her tongue in his mouth, deepening the kiss.

 _Good thing I didn't waste time on subtle. She wants this too._

He kisses her for another moment before pulling away to whisper "Wanna get out of here?"

She nods, eyes blurry and lips puffy.

 _This is going to happen. I can't believe this is going to happen._

He throws some money down on the bar and practically drags her out of there, sliding her into the first cab he sees. He tells the driver his hotel before pulling Rory right back to his lips.

He is beginning to feel drugged by her kisses. They can't get close enough, and Logan slips his hand under her dress.

She pulls away, breathing hard. "Logan-"

 _Shit. I pushed her too fast._

He rests his forehead on hers and asks "Second thoughts?"

She laughs. "No. Not at all. I just wanted to make sure you have… you know… I'm here for work, and I didn't bring any… protection. I thought I would just be working this week, and…"

"Ugh," he groans. "I don't have anything either. I was only planning on working this trip too. I certainly didn't think I would run into you." He kisses her again before leaning up to tap the driver on the shoulder. "Gemischtwrenladen?"

"Impressive," Rory says.

"I went to boarding school in Switzerland," he says between kisses.

When the taxi stops, he runs in and buys the condoms as quick as he can. He is back in Rory's arms in under five minutes, heading to his hotel.

Somehow they manage to get on the elevator and up to his room without him having his way with her right then and there.

Rory looks around the room as the door closes behind him. "Wow. This place is nice-"

He does not have the patience for small talk; he has to have her. He spins her around and kisses her hard. She pushes his jacket off and pulls at his tie. They simultaneously reach for buttons, but she gets his shirt off much quicker than he can get her dress off.

"Logan! What is taking you so long?"

"How many damn buttons does this dress have?"

She scoffs. "Do not mock this dress. This is my lucky dress!"

"Ace, this dress is about to keep you from getting lucky," he responds laughing.

She smiles shyly. "You called me Ace."

 _It just slipped out. But it already feels so normal again…_

"Well… yeah."

Rory slowly unbuttons her dress, letting it fall to the floor.

"I can take it from here," Logan says, reaching behind her to unhook her bra.

"Good to know you haven't lost _all_ your skills."

Logan smirks. He picks her up and gently tosses her back onto the bed. She giggles, propping up on her elbows to watch him remove the rest of his clothes. He reaches for her hips and pulls her panties off, tossing them aside.

He climbs onto the bed with her, pausing while Rory grabs a condom, rips it open, and rolls it on him.

"Are you sure?"

"Come on, Logan. Do you want me to beg?"

"Well, I wouldn't be opposed to hearing that- Oh God," Logan moans as Rory pulls him inside her. His eyes close as he slows down to adjust to the feeling of her.

 _I have been fooling myself for years._

 _This._

 _This is what sex is supposed to feel like._

They begin to move, and it's almost more than he can take.

It all comes back to them. The places to touch. The paces to set. The words to whisper.

Afterwards, they lay in languid silence for what feels like an eternity. Her head is on his chest, and Logan absent-mindedly strokes her shoulder.

 _I should say something, but my brain is total mush._

He tilts his face to kiss her forehead, causing Rory to finally break the silence. "I had forgotten how good… You have definitely not lost your skills."

"You either. I just can't believe that we've deprived ourselves of that for so long."

She giggles and leans further over him, kissing along his neck and collarbone. "Let's not wait so long next time."

"Ace, I'm not twenty-three anymore. You've got to give me a little time."

She sits up, exaggeratedly pouting. She slides one leg over his torso, straddling him. "Would it help if I…" she trails off leaning forward to nibble his earlobe. Logan's eyes roll back in his head when she traces the outer shell with her tongue.

 _It does help. She wants me. Bad._

"Come here," he whispers, pulling her upward.

"Where?" she smiles kissing his lips.

He grabs her by the hips, simultaneously sliding down the bed until she is hovering over his face. "Here," he says before leaning up to lap at her.

Rory gasps. Logan chuckles against her, increasing the friction. Rory begins circling her hips as Logan keeps up his assault. _I love that I can still make her react like this._

Soon she is whimpering, frantically grinding against his face. Logan reaches his left hand up to touch her breast, taking his right hand down to touch himself. When she grabs the headboard to steady herself, he knows she's close. He pulls her clit into his mouth, pinches her nipple hard, and listens for the sounds that let him know she's satisfied.

She sighs contentedly, slowing her movements. Logan keeps his own machinations going, and by the time she's shifted off of him, he has already come.

"Oh, I missed it," she says.

"No, you didn't. That was all you."

She is quiet for a moment. "It's just like the first time."

The irony is not lost on him.

He rolls out of bed, heading to the bathroom to clean off. When he returns, Rory is almost asleep. He slides in next to her, kissing her forehead, before drifting off.

* * *

At 3:30 AM, Logan is awakened by the presence of a body beside him. It is a moment before he remembers who it is and what has already transpired in this bed.

 _How did I get this lucky? How did I run into her just when I was thinking about closing that door completely? I have wanted this for years, and it's finally happening._

He takes in her sleeping form, remembering all the times he has watched her sleep. All the times he has woken her up to _not_ sleep. As he leans in to kiss her neck, his erection pokes into her side, causing her to slowly open her eyes.

"Logan?" she whispers.

"Yeah, Ace. Are you asleep?"

"Not anymore," she says groggily, before taking him in her hand.

Her touch drives him wild; his skin is on fire. She must feel it too because she climbs on him quickly. He pauses only long enough to put on a condom before he pushes up into her. She drives her hips down fast and tight. Logan grabs her ass, trying to move her even quicker.

"Harder," she whispers, and he does his best to oblige. She bites his shoulder to muffle her cries, and he's done for. She comes right after he does, collapsing onto him.

"Thanks," she says.

"For what?" he asks.

"Waking me up."

"Anytime," he says as he rolls her over to spoon her.

His last thought before he falls asleep is how awkward it will be to give Jean that ring back.

* * *

Logan opens his eyes the next morning to find the bed empty. He sits up quickly, looking around, before hearing Rory in the bathroom. He smiles to himself when he spots the red dress on the floor.

 _It wasn't a dream. Rory was here with me. All night._

He leans over to the bedside table and grabs the room service menu.

 _We're going to have to talk about the past before we can move forward, and I would rather have her well-fed when we do that._

A few minutes later, she emerges from the bathroom in her bra and panties. He smiles his biggest smile and asks "What do you want for breakfast? I'll let you order pancakes _and_ eggs."

Her face falters before she reaches down to pull her dress off of the floor. "I can't stay. I have an early flight this morning, and I've still got to get back to my hotel and pack."

His heart sinks. He watches wordlessly as she buttons up the dress that he had worked so hard to get off of her.

"Are you sure? I know you can't resist breakfast food. Or hotel sex," he teases. "I'll get you a later flight."

"I can't let you do that," she says, grabbing his phone off of the nightstand. "But this was fun. We should do this again."

He stares at her, his smile fading. He can only assume she is programming her number into his phone. He hears her phone ring as she calls herself. She drops it into her purse, before leaning down to kiss him sweetly.

"I still just can't believe we ran into each other like this!" she says.

"Yeah."

"So, call me. Okay?" Rory smiles at him one last time.

And just like that, she's out the door.

He sits there, stunned. _I am such an idiot. I'm planning out our future, and she just wanted to get laid._

Logan thinks back through the last twenty-four hours. The talking, the laughing, the touching.

 _How could I have misread her so badly?_

 _Which Rory was lying? Last night or this morning?_

 _Maybe she just freaked out when she woke up. Maybe she thinks I'm not taking this seriously. Maybe she thinks I am seeing someone else. Maybe she'll call me soon, and I can tell her that I'm in._

 _That I never actually left._

 _Or maybe I should remember that she said no. She had reasons._

 _Maybe I should let her run away and get over this once and for all._

Logan slowly gets out of bed, gets dressed, and packs up his things.

He's on his phone in the lobby, scrolling through twitter, when Bobbi approaches.

"Morning," he says. "You talked to Will yet? Is he up?"

"Yes. He'll be down in a few… How was your night?" she asks, waggling her eyebrows.

 _Shit. I forgot they would have questions._

"It was fine."

"Just fine?"

"Yeah. We caught up a little. It was good to see her," Logan lies.

"So I _didn't_ see her leaving this morning when I was down here getting coffee?" she asks.

 _Fuck._

"I don't know who you saw… I… Leave it alone. I don't want to talk about it," he says.

"Mate. Tell me you turned all that eye-fucking into some real fucking," Will jokes as he joins the group. Logan doesn't say anything, and Will pushes on. "There was some serious sexual tension out on the sidewalk."

"Let's go," Logan says abruptly, wheeling his suitcase out of the lobby and towards a waiting taxi.

 _Maybe if I pretend to sleep the whole way home, no one will talk to me._

* * *

 **JULY 2015**

"Logan?"

"Hey! I'm upstairs. Let me come get your bags."

He takes the steps two at a time, the nervous energy surrounding his decision coursing through his body.

He greets Odette with a kiss on the cheek. "How was your flight?"

"Bien," she says, not looking up from her phone. "Oh… Mamá is in town. They want to have dinner with us tonight."

"That's fine," Logan says as he takes her suitcase up the stairs.

"I don't really want to see them… I need to talk to you about something," she says following him up.

 _I bet they have been pressuring her about an engagement too. I guess now is as good a time as any to do this._

"I know what it is, and… let's sit down," he says, leading her by the hand to the sectional and sitting down opposite her. "I've been thinking about us a lot lately _(especially since Rory crushed me),_ and I wanted to know what you would think…" he trails off, suddenly nervous.

He clears his throat and starts again. "I know we've never really talked about a future, but we've been at this for a while now, and… What would you think about getting engaged?"

He internally cringes at his awkward choice of words.

Her mouth drops open in surprise. "Oh, Logan," she says, her eyes full of pity.

Logan feels the perspiration bead up between his shoulder blades.

 _What the fuck? How am I never prepared for this?_

 _Why doesn't anyone want to marry me? I am a goddamn catch._

Odette gently touches his forearm. "Why are you doing this? You don't want to marry me."

He sighs heavily.

 _I had just about convinced myself that I did._

"You weren't swayed by that romantic proposal?" he asks sarcastically. "I… we're good right? We get along well, and… I've been getting a lot of pressure from my family… Your family."

" _My_ family?"

"That isn't what you wanted to talk to me about? Your parents pushing this engagement?" he says.

"No. I didn't know they were serious about that. I needed to tell you that I'm seeing Henri again, and I want to try and make it work with him. I was going to tell you that we have to stop sleeping together. This is awful. Mamá will never understand. They're going to blame me."

"Uh, it's your fault," he says, only partly joking. "I'm willing here."

"You would go through with this?" she asks.

 _After a week of moping, a week of anger, and three days of realizing that the true love rocket has soared out of the atmosphere, and isn't coming back…_

"Yes."

She looks at him hard.

"Probably," he concedes.

"As flattered as I am that you are willing to settle for me, this is not going to work for either of us," she says.

 _So we're not going to get engaged, we're going to break up. What a strange turn of events._

 _And... Maybe I'm a little relieved._

Logan takes a deep breath. "I guess you're right. I just thought… But _you_ have to give your parents the ring back."

Odette eyes him quizzingly.

Logan heads to his nightstand and returns with the maroon velvet box.

She gasps when she sees what's inside. "Where did you get this?" she asks.

"Your father," he answers. "He took me to dinner one night and gave it to me to propose with."

"This is serious. He would not have given you this ring if he didn't mean for us to be married soon. Papá and Mitchum have probably already drawn up financial papers. And you agreed to all of this?" she asks.

"Not exactly. I haven't really said yes or no. I didn't know what to say to your father. I just nodded along like an idiot."

Her face starts to fall. "We're going to have to do this. Papá will never let me out of this now. I can't believe he gave you this ring."

She slowly slides it onto her left hand. She looks so depressed that Logan feels compelled to offer her a way out. "We don't have to do this. They can't make us get married. This isn't the Middle Ages," he says.

"No, I know what this means. This is about money somehow. What am I going to tell Henri?"

"I don't understand. Dad was pressuring me, but it never felt like I didn't have a choice," Logan says.

She just sighs. "I know I don't have a choice. He will cut me off completely. He has said things in the past..."

 _Why do our parents always threaten the money?_

 _I wonder if Dad would write me out of the will?_

 _I make HPG a lot of money. Money of my own. I'd be fine. Even if he fired me, I could find another job pretty easily._

 _But she works for practically nothing in a gallery. This would devastate her._

 _And I don't want that for her._

"What if we say we want a really long engagement? Buy some time until we can figure out an exit strategy. Let you stockpile some cash."

"Would it be a real engagement to you?" she asks. "You were asking for real, and now I feel bad. Like I've been cheating on you. But I didn't know that… I just assumed you've been seeing other people."

"Don't feel bad. I haven't been a saint. I _was_ always seeing other people, and… I slept with Rory three weeks ago," he admits.

"What? When did you see Rory?"

"I ran into her, and…" he tells her the whole story, and she is appropriately outraged. Just not in any way he would have expected.

"You idiot. Maybe that's not what she meant," she says.

"What else could she have meant?" he asks.

"Um, that it was really fun, and she hopes you can do it again," she says in a condescending tone.

"That's not… Look, I know her."

 _At least I used to know her. Maybe Odette has a point._

"This is why you're willing to marry me. Because you think I'm the only option. But I bet she is sitting home devastated that you haven't called her," she says.

"Then… what are we supposed to do?" Logan asks.

"First, I need to call Henri and tell him what's happening here. And…" She takes his phone off of the coffee table and quickly types out a text. "You've made the first move with Rory."

"What are you-"

"And we just stall on the wedding as long as we can. I'll drop hints to Mamá that I'm not ready for marriage, and you keep Mitchum aware of the actual situation. We'll get out of this."

"Did you just text Rory?" he shouts.

"Are you listening to me? If we want to be able to have the lives we really want, we have to have a solid plan before we meet my parents for dinner."

"Well, the plan seems to be that we're engaged. Except we're actually breaking up... because you apparently have a boyfriend… and I am waiting to hear from someone who is absolutely not going to text back. Does that sound like a good plan to you?" he asks, irritated.

"That sounds like a terrible plan," Odette admits.

They sit in silence for a while, contemplating the enormity of their decision.

 _How the fuck did I get into this mess?_

Logan's phone pings, pulling him from his thoughts. He picks it up to find a response from Rory.

 **Hey! I didn't know if you would get in touch. I'm really glad you did.**

Logan can't keep the smile off of his face. Odette takes the phone from him and reads the message.

"Well, I guess this is the plan then," she says.

* * *

 **October 2015**

"Hey, you," Logan says answering the phone at his desk.

"Logan?" Rory asks in a small voice.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?"

She sniffles. "Grandpa had a heart attack last night. He didn't make it."

"Ace, I'm so sorry," he says, pausing for a moment to figure out the right words. "He was a really great man, and I know how much you loved him."

She chokes back a sob in response.

"What can I do? Do you want me to come there?"

 _Tone it down. You're not her boyfriend. You're just someone she texts with._

"I do want you to come," she says.

 _We_ _ **do**_ _text almost every day._

"But you can't," she continues. "I'm trying to keep it together for Mom and Grandma, and I can't have you here. It will just lead to too many questions…"

 _Reminder: You are_ _ **not**_ _her boyfriend._

Logan sighs. "Okay. Is there anything else I can do?"

"Can I come there?" Rory asks.

"To London? Of course. When do you want to come?"

"I think the service is going to be on Friday or Saturday, and I can come after that," she says.

"Just send me the flight info, and I'll set up car service."

"I haven't booked a hotel yet or anything."

"Rory, you can stay with me."

 _I desperately want to be your boyfriend._

"I may try and get some work done while I'm there, so it could be like a week," she says.

"It's fine. I have plenty of room. I won't take no for an answer. What else can I do for you?"

"Will you just talk to me for a little bit? I can't walk back in there yet," she says.

"What do you want to talk about? I'm all yours."

He sends a quick IM to his secretary to hold all his calls and shuts his office door.

"What are you working on right now?" she asks.

"It's really boring, but the gist of it is…"

* * *

That Sunday morning at 6:00 AM, Logan sits in his kitchen nervously drumming his fingers along his coffee mug.

 _She should be here any minute, and I don't know how to act. Are we together? Are we friends? Am I like an old security blanket?_

He hears the knock on the door, and instantly decides that he can make no assumptions.

 _We are friends, and she's experienced a horrible loss. Coffee, comfort, support. That's what I'm here for._

He opens the door to find Rory waiting on the other side. "Hey," he says, resigned to conceal his affection.

She steps into his apartment, rolling her suitcase behind her. He closes the door, and when he turns around Rory is in his arms. Her hands are greedy, and her kisses are hungry. He is swept away for a moment before his mind starts working again, and he pulls away.

"Rory," he whispers. "Are you sure this is what you want? You've suffered an enormous loss, and-"

"I've spent the last week making sure Mom and Grandma were okay. I spent the flight finally mourning properly. And now I just want to forget for a little while." She looks down and then peers up at him with tear-filled eyes. "Just... help me forget, Logan."

 _It's cute how she thinks I would have the willpower to say no. I've never been able to resist her, and I certainly can't start now._

He takes her by the hand and leads her up the stairs to his bedroom.

* * *

Later that morning, Logan is on the couch working when he hears Rory stir in the bedroom.

She comes out wearing one of his t-shirts, and Logan sits back to admire her. _My shirt, bedhead… This is what Sunday morning should feel like._

"How are you feeling?" he asks as she comes to sit next to him, her knees pulled close to her body.

"Better. Thanks for… everything. Letting me come, not asking too many questions… just everything," she says.

"There's nothing I'd rather be doing," he says honestly as he puts away his laptop and pulls her closer to him. "What do you want to do today? Anything you want."

"Can we have 'Lazy Sunday'?" she asks.

Logan smiles broadly. "I haven't thought about 'Lazy Sunday' in years. I could use one. Let's do it. I'll go get food, and you figure out what you want to watch."

Fifteen minutes later, he returns with cappuccinos and croissants. Rory is going through his books downstairs, still wearing nothing but his shirt and her panties.

She turns as he comes in and says "I realized that I don't know what you watch anymore. We used to watch all the same things, but…"

"Well, you still like coffee and pastries, right?" he asks with a smile.

She gives him a knowing look.

"So we'll figure the rest out."

"How about… you pick something first. What's your favorite show right now?" she asks.

He thinks for a moment before answering. "Probably _Halt and Catch Fire_. Have you seen it?"

"Nope. Queue up episode one."

They take their treats upstairs and settle in to the couch. He has to explain some of the more technical jargon to her, but she seems to enjoy it.

"What did you think? Ready for a binge?" he asks when the episode is over.

"I liked it. I really like the main guy, Joe," she says.

"I should have figured," he says.

"What does that mean?"

"Well," Logan begins. "He's dark, sarcastic… the bad boy. That's your type, right?" He thinks about Jess and the unconditional loathing he can't seem to shake.

"What makes you think that? That's not my-"

"Forget about it," he interrupts, embarrassed at his admission. "What's your favorite show? Let's watch something else."

She looks at him for a moment, her big blue eyes blinking furiously.

 _I am so lame. Now she knows I'm still jealous of him._

 _Just play it cool. Move on._

"Your choice," he says, nudging her.

"Well, I was going to choose _The Americans_ , but… have you ever watched _The Good Wife_?" she asks.

"No, but I know what it's about. Is it good?"

"Yeah, I love it."

"Well, it's your choice," he says with a smile. "Coffee refill before we start?"

She hands over her cup, and when he has returned upstairs with fresh coffee for both of them, she has the first episode ready to start. He hands her the coffee and sits down beside her.

About ten minutes in, she pauses it and says "So Cary. He's my favorite."

Logan furrows his brow. "That guy? He seems kind of douchy."

"No. Well, maybe right here, but he gets better as the show goes on. Plus, I think he's really beautiful. I would say _he's_ more my type."

Logan looks back at the screen. The actor is about his build, his coloring, and, after a moment, he understands what Rory is implying. He tries, and fails, to keep the grin off of his face.

She shifts around to face him, tucking one of her legs underneath her. "So a few seasons from now, he ends up with Kalinda. You haven't seen her yet." She pauses, and he notices a blush creep up her cheeks.

"Yeah…" he prods.

"So… there's this scene where he just like… fucks her up against the window."

 _Whoa_ _._

Logan's head jerks up to watch her closely. His heart is pounding.

Her eyes are focused on her hands in her lap, and soon she continues in a quiet voice. "Sometimes… if I'm lonely, I'll put it on and pause it there, and…"

He lets it hang in the air for a bit, before he pushes back. "What do you do, Rory?"

She finally looks up at him, beet red. "You _know_ what…"

He leans over to grasp her hips pulling her up toward him until she is straddling his lap. "Do you need me to help you say it?" he whispers.

She nods, simultaneously rolling her hips against him.

"You like to fantasize about getting fucked up against the window."

She leans in and kisses the hollow next to his Adam's apple. "Not quite," she whispers back. "I like to fantasize about _you_ fucking me up against the window."

 _Jesus fucking Christ._

He practically growls as he stands up, wrapping her legs around his body, and carries her to the window.

* * *

They are back on the couch attempting to finish the episode of _The Good Wife_ when Logan's cell phone rings, interrupting them.

"It's 'Lazy Sunday'," he says. "I'm not working. Just decline it."

Rory picks up his phone, then turns it to face him. "It's not work. It's… Odette."

 _Shit. How do I explain that?_

"Oh… You can still decline it," he says. _I'm just_ _ **not going**_ _to explain that. At least not until I'm out of the situation._

Rory declines the call and sets his phone back on the coffee table. But a few minutes later, she pauses the television and sits up to look at him.

"You could have taken that call."

"I don't… It wasn't important," he says honestly.

"This is great, right?" she asks. "You and me."

"Yes. It's really great." _How do I respond to that without sounding too eager?_

"So… I'm thinking that I want to keep seeing you. Doing this."

 _Yes. Absolutely. I want to do this forever._

He nods.

"But…" she continues.

 _No. No buts._

"I live in New York, and you live here. We're both so busy with work, and it just seems like… maybe we shouldn't push this to be more than it is."

"What does that mean?" Logan asks nervously.

"You know, when we're together, we're together. And when we're not, we're not. Like... if we were in Vegas. It's great there, but whatever happens there, stays there," she explains.

"So… you want to keep this casual. _Stringless_ fun," he teases.

"What do you think?" she asks.

 _I think it is a terrible idea. The idea of being one of your many makes me want to vomit._

"I don't know. Do you think that's possible for us?"

"I think it has to be. I just can't make any kind of commitment right now. But I definitely want this to continue," she begins rambling. "And I know you're thinking that's not who I am, but I've changed a lot, and this is what I want. Really. I'm not just saying that this time. Is that what you want?"

 _No. I want you and only you, but I'm going to take what I can get right now. Because there is no way you have changed that much._

 _You're the one who said_ " _This casual dating thing. I don't like it. It's not who I am. And I don't wanna make it who I am."_

 _Also, I'm technically engaged so I guess I have no room to make demands. I'll have to tell her about Odette soon._

" _I'm a girlfriend girl, Logan. I have boyfriends. Not escorts." No way she is going to want be "casual" for very long._

 _If I do this right, I'll win her back in a couple of months._

"I want whatever you want," he says, choosing his words carefully. "But I definitely want to keep seeing you."

She smiles and snuggles close to him. "So are you seeing where this is going?" she asks, gesturing toward the TV.

"Yeah. She's going to end up with Josh Charles. Obviously."

She sighs. "Oh, Logan. We're going to have to keep watching."

" _I thought I could be different, but I can't. I'm sorry."_

 _You are going to end up with me. Obviously._

* * *

Logan opens the door to his flat on Monday. "Rory? I brought lunch. Are you hungry?"

She comes out of the kitchen wearing a short silk robe and smiles. "Not for lunch."

She takes the bag of takeout from him, drops it down to the floor, and pulls him by the tie toward the study before pushing him into a chair. She loses her robe, and soon he is just as naked. Before he even knows what is happening, she is on her knees in front of him. His hands are in her hair, and his head is back in ecstasy, eyes closed.

 _Best. Lunch break. Ever._

 _I had forgotten how good she was at this._

He can't control how loudly he's moaning, and he feels Rory smile against him. He opens his eyes to watch her, but is distracted by the sight of Finn in front of him.

"What the fuck, Finn!" he shouts. Rory pulls off of him, painfully scraping her teeth as she looks over her shoulder. _Ouch._

"Oh my God," she says, scrambling into Logan's lap and hiding her head in crook of his neck. He reaches down to grab her robe and pull it over their naked bodies.

"What are you doing here?" Logan asks, wincing as he attempts to rearrange them into a more comfortable position. Rory is as still as a statue, unable to move.

"Well, the door was wide open, so I just followed the trail of clothes. Rory, love, great to see you. You're looking fit."

"Oh my God," she whispers again. "Make him go away, please."

"Will you get out? I'll be with you in a minute," Logan says.

Finn continues to smirk, so Logan tries again in a harsher tone. "Upstairs, now!"

He finally turns and heads up the stairs.

"You okay?" Logan asks her, and she reluctantly pulls her head away from his neck.

"Yeah. I'm just _so_ embarrassed."

"Hey, it's not the first time Finn has walked in on us," he reminds her.

"I know. It's not even the second time," she says. "But it's different. We're not… you know… together."

 _Not yet, Ace._

He kisses her temple before saying "I'll go get rid of him. Can I get a raincheck on earlier though? Because that was pretty mind-blowing. Pun intended."

She rolls her eyes before finally moving out of his lap and pulling the robe around her body.

Logan stands as well and quickly gets dressed. He stomps up the stairs shouting "There better be a really good explanation by the time I get upstairs."

Finn is sprawled across the sectional, scrolling through his phone. "The explanation is that I wanted to come visit my oldest friend. I had no idea you would be entertaining, especially not with dear Reporter Girl. What is going on, and how long have you two been back together?"

"We're not together… It's complicated. What's really going on? Is Andy with you?" Logan asks.

"No. We're fighting."

"Aah… so that's why you're here. What happened?"

"He caught me watching straight porn, and he's convinced that I want to sleep with women," Finn says.

"Do you want to sleep with women?"

"Of course I do. But I don't want to cheat, so that's why I was watching porn. If I had known I could have come here for a live show, I would have done that sooner," Finn says with a smirk.

" _Do not_ say anything like that to her. She's embarrassed enough as it is. Now, listen. I gotta get back to the office, but you can't stay here. You're going to have to find a hotel," Logan says.

"Okay, okay. How mad is she? Would she hang out with me today? I haven't seen her in a couple of years."

"I don't know. She's mortified," Logan says.

"Oh, it's no big deal. What's a little fellatio between friends? So you just go back to your little job, and I will mind your woman."

Logan rolls his eyes and heads back down the stairs. He finds Rory in the chair in the study, eating an eggroll and pretending to read a book.

"Hey," he says, pulling her out of the chair to stand in front of him. "I need to get back, but I'll try and get away early. Finn wants to hang out with you today if you're up for it. And you don't have to."

She flushes and sighs.

He kisses her squarely on the lips. "It's not a big deal, Ace. If anyone was going to walk in here and see us, at least he's the best option, right?"

She nods her acceptance, but the awkwardness is still present.

"I'll see you tonight," he says, kissing her one last time before heading out the door.

 _I hope this doesn't make her change her mind about being with me._

 _I'm gonna kill Finn._

* * *

By some stroke of luck, Logan's last conference call of the day is cancelled. Without so much as a goodbye to anyone, he is out the door, racing to his apartment.

 _So this is what it feels like to want to be at home._

He enters his flat to complete silence. _Are they not here?_

"Yes, that's it!" he hears Finn call out.

He heads up the stairs inhaling the strong scent of marijuana, and he rounds the corner just in time to see Rory pull off of his bong.

"Are you guys getting stoned?" he asks.

"Logan! You're home. Yes, we're trying to," Finn says. "Did you know that dear Rory has never gotten high before?"

Logan shakes his head. "I used to know that, but she tells me that she's changed a lot."

Rory's eyes are blood shot and as big as saucers. "You're home a lot earlier than you said."

"Finished early. Did not expect to find Finn teaching you how to hit the bong."

"She's a natural!" Finn declares.

"I just thought… if there was ever a time," she says.

Finn offers him the bong, but he has to decline. "I have to listen to a ton of presentations tomorrow. I'm going to go change."

Finn rolls his eyes, dramatically saying "Such an adult," as Logan heads to his bedroom.

Rory follows him a moment later. "Are you mad?"

"No! Rory… have I ever been one to get mad at people who are trying to have a little fun?" He unbuttons his shirt and tosses it into his dry cleaning pile.

Rory approaches, running her hands along his sides. He pulls her in tight, inhaling the scent of her shampoo.

"I promise I'm not mad. Go get high, and then I'll take you to dinner. Trust me, you're going to be starving in about an hour."

* * *

Rory excuses herself to the restroom, and once she is safely out of earshot, Finn turns to face Logan across the table.

"So Rory explained this 'Vegas' arrangement to me."

Logan can only roll his eyes.

Finn continues. "I've known you to go along with some stupid ideas in the past, but, mate… this seems colossally stupid."

"Apparently Rory has changed her tune since we were together. It's what she says she wants," Logan counters.

"But what do _you_ want?"

"I'm hoping she'll come around, but what can I say? 'Hey, Rory, let's be exclusive, except for the fact that I'm technically engaged to someone else'."

"Does she know about Odette?" Finn asks.

"No. My goal is to be out of this engagement soon, and then I'll tell her once it's over."

"Does Odette know about Rory?"

Logan nods. "Yeah."

Finn is quiet for a second, before he asks seriously "You know what you're doing here, right?"

"I have no fucking clue what I'm doing."

"Be careful, mate. This is dangerous. For all of you," Finn warns.

Logan nods again as Rory returns to the table.

"How ya doin', Cheech?" he teases as she sits back down.

"I'm fine. The mirror tripped me out a bit, but I'm good," she says.

Finn and Logan share a laugh. "First timer."

When the food arrives, Rory dives into her burger and fries before turning to scoff at Logan's meal. "That's not what you're eating, is it?"

He looks down at his bun-less burger and side salad.

"Well, I normally go to the gym at lunch, but I had other plans today," he retorts with a smirk.

"So that's how you look like this?" she asks.

"Uh… look like what?"

"You look even better than college. You're not supposed to have a better body ten years later," Rory says.

 _She must still be really high to talk like this in front of Finn._

"Well, I also only drink about a quarter of what I did in college."

"Don't be modest, Logan," Finn says. "He has a personal trainer and competes in triathlons."

"Triathlons? Wow. I feel lazy," Rory says.

He leans over to whisper in her ear. "I can personally attest that your body looks better than it did in college too."

He smiles when a blush creeps up her neck.

 _Sexual innuendo in front of Finn? This is moving along quicker than I even could have hoped._

* * *

When Logan checks in with Rory on Thursday during lunch, she is downright giddy.

"I have had the best day! Naomi's people were so pleased with the article that they want to maybe turn it into a series of features. And then Conde Nast called! They also really liked the article, and they want to set up a meeting."

"Ace, that's great. I'm so happy for you. You deserve it."

"The only problem… is that I need to go home," she says softly.

 _Fuck. That did not occur to me._

"When?"

"My meeting is Monday, so I should probably leave tomorrow," she says.

 _Okay. It's okay. Play it cool._

"Let's have a celebratory dinner tonight then. The Ivy. I'll have a car come pick you up, and we'll toast to all your success." He keeps his tone light, not hinting at the anguish he suddenly feels.

He is able to keep it up through dinner, but later that night when they are lying in bed, his hand lazily tracing circles on her back, the gloom settles in.

"What are you thinking?" she whispers.

He sighs heavily. "That I don't know when I'll see you again. And that… makes me sad," he says, surprised at his own vulnerability.

"Let's make a deal. Let's always plan the next time before we leave each other," she offers.

 _That doesn't sound very 'Vegas', but I love it so…_

"I'll be in New York for Thanksgiving. Will you be in Stars Hollow?"

"Yes, but I could probably slip back to the city easily. Should we plan on trying to get together that week?" she asks.

"Absolutely. I'll make it happen." His mood instantly ticks up.

 _Whatever I have to do to see her again, I'm going to do._

* * *

 **November 2015**

 **My Conde Nast meeting got rescheduled for the Friday after Thanksgiving, so I'll probably stay in NY instead of SH.**

Logan reads the text from Rory and smiles.

He quickly calls her.

"Hey. That's an odd time to schedule a meeting."

"I know," she replies. "But it's Conde Nast, so I'm not going to be picky. I think I'm going to stay in the city so that I make sure I'm ready. What are your plans?"

"I'm flying in on Wednesday, and I won't leave until a redeye Saturday night," he tells her. "I have to be at Honor's on Thursday, but other than that, I'm all yours."

 _Reign it in, big guy._

"That sounds perfect. Why don't you come to my apartment when you get in? It's not the Plaza, but…"

"I like that. I need to see this apartment for myself."

Wednesday afternoon Logan takes a taxi to the address in Brooklyn Rory has provided him. He heads up the stairs to her walk-up, and lightly knocks on the door.

She opens it, full smile, and throws herself into his arms.

"Hey!" she says against his neck.

He ducks around her saying "I have to see this wall."

She laughs and points down the hall.

"Thanks," he says dropping his bag and moving toward it. "This has been driving me crazy since you told me about it." He puts his hand along the sticky wall. "You've lived here for five years and have never tried to figure out what this is?"

"Nope. It's just a part of its charm."

"Sometimes I do not understand you, Gilmore. You have a trust fund, right? I mean, this place is not much better than that shithole you lived in with Paris."

"It's not so bad, and I'm out of here next week, so you won't have to be here for long," she says.

"That doesn't give me very much time to figure out this wall."

She smiles. "So I called Conde Nast earlier to confirm since no one has called me, and it turns out… the meeting is actually next Friday. Which of course makes more sense. I'm not sure how I mixed up the dates."

"Does this mean you're going to Stars Hollow?" Logan asks nervously.

 _Please stay here with me._

"No. I already made plans with you," she says kissing him on the lips and reaching for his belt. "Come on. That wall will still be sticky tomorrow."

* * *

London time wakes Logan up early the next morning. He heads into the kitchen and starts a pot of coffee. He opens his laptop at the breakfast table and begins working.

Rory awakens about an hour later, shuffling over to sit in his lap. "You're working on Thanksgiving?" she asks.

"Yes, and I've been very productive. Tell me- Did you paint the wall yourself?"

"What? Are you still thinking about that? But, yes. I painted it right after I moved in. The person who lived here before smoked, and the walls were stained yellow."

"I'm guessing you didn't sand and clean the walls first," Logan says knowingly.

"Um…"

"So that's why it's sticky," he says triumphantly. "Cigarette smoke gets into the walls, and now it's leaching out through your paint."

"Logan, you are such a dork. I can't believe you-"

He cuts her off with a kiss. "So now that that is settled, what do you want to do this morning? I don't have to be at Honor's for a couple of hours."

"A couple of hours?" she says, raising her eyebrows.

He laughs and lets her lead him back to the bedroom.

* * *

Logan returns to Brooklyn that night with a bag full of leftovers.

"How was it?" she asks.

He drops the food on the table and joins her on the couch. "It was fine, but… I missed you. I couldn't wait to get back." He pulls her toward him and puts his arms around her.

"How did you explain taking all the food?" Rory asks him.

"I asked the nanny to pack it for me and not to tell anyone. What have you been doing all afternoon?"

"Packing," she says.

"You've done a lot," he says, looking around the room. "Where are you going to put all of these boxes? It would completely fill your mom's house."

"I know. I'm going to send some to Grandma's, Lane's. I was going to put some at Paris's place here, but Doyle just moved out, and I don't know if it's the best timing."

"Lane and Paris both have kids. You think you're going to crash there often?" he asks.

"I don't know, but like you said… these can't all go to Mom's. And I don't want to always stay with her anyway. I'm thirty-one. I can't move back into my mom's house. I just need some flexibility. So I can go where the work takes me."

"Okay. If you say so."

 _Would it be too much if I…_

 _She's planning on working on that Shropshire piece a lot…_

 _I don't want to scare her off._

"What?" she asks, interrupting his thoughts.

"What what?"

"What are you thinking, but not saying?" she prods.

 _It's annoying how well she knows me. Just say it._

"You can send some of your stuff to my place if you want. It seems like you'll be working in London a fair amount, and you know I have the space."

Rory looks at him for a moment before answering. "I don't want to impose."

"It's not imposing if I offer. Plus… You plan on being there right? When we go to Vegas."

 _Please say that you'll be there._

Rory's whole face breaks into a smile, and Logan can't help but smile back.

"Actually," she says, "I have some time off over Christmas. Nothing planned at all. I was thinking maybe I could come to London that week. If that works for you."

 _I'm supposed to be in Paris with Odette's family._

"That sounds perfect."

* * *

 **December 2015**

"Hey!" Logan says as he answers Odette's call. "I've been meaning to call you. I'm sorry. Work is crazy right now. I'm working on this thing in Japan, and-"

"It's fine. I just wanted to double check that we are telling our families the same thing. Mamá was pestering me again today about why you weren't coming for Christmas."

"I guess 'He's having his ex-girlfriend come and stay with him instead' didn't fly." Logan jokes.

"I told her it was work so give me some of the details on this Japan thing."

"I'm really sorry," he says. "I know you haven't had time to put away enough money, and I know I'm being selfish. What if I fly down this weekend? I have a tight window, but I could get there. Then I'll apologize to your parents myself."

"If you want… But maybe it's time to tell the truth. Surely they want us to be happy. I'll tell my parents about Henri, and you tell yours about Rory," she says.

 _Unfortunately…_

"I don't really have anything to tell yet. But if that's what _you_ want…" Logan trails off. _I'm not going to stop you._

"Yes. Yes, I am going to go tell her right now," she says defiantly.

"Okay, good luck. Let me know what happens so I know what to say when your father inevitably calls me."

Two hours later he gets a text from Odette.

 **It did not go well. No marriage, no money.**

 _Shit. Now I'm completely responsible for her financial well-being too._

He goes to call her, but an incoming call beats him to it. _Jean. Shit._

He declines the call while he tries to think of what he will say. He is staring blankly at his monitor when Jean himself walks in, unannounced.

"Jean… I…" Logan stammers as he rises behind his desk.

"Celine just called me. What is going on? Odette says you don't want to get married," Jean says, his voice rising.

"Well, it's not that, it's just…"

"It's just what?"

Logan hasn't felt this intimidated since he left boarding school. He swallows a few times.

"You are going to marry my daughter," Jean says succinctly before storming out of the room.

Logan sinks back down into his chair.

 _I'm not thirteen years old. He can't just order me around._

A few minutes later, Mitchum calls.

 _I guess I better answer this one, or else he'll just walk in here too._

"What in God's name do you think you're doing? Are you only capable of ruining things?" Mitchum berates him as he answers the phone.

"Hello, Dad."

"You and Odette are getting married. There are a lot of financial intricacies here that you are not aware of, and this merger will happen, Logan."

"What intricacies?"

"It's not important that you know," Mitchum says.

"It's not important that I know?" Logan shouts. "This is _my_ life, Dad. And I've told you over and over, we don't want to get married."

Mitchum huffs. "This is not acceptable. Figure it out son," he says, abruptly hanging up.

Instantaneously, another text comes in from Odette.

 **I'm really sorry.**

 _I'll give Odette a little more time, but as soon as Rory and I are back on track, I'm out of this._

 _This is not a merger. This is my life, and they can't force me to do anything._

 _Fuck this. Fuck them. I'm going to do exactly as I please._

 _And right now, I please to ignore all of them._

He picks up his phone and calls Rory.

* * *

The second day that Rory is back in London, Logan pesters her to go out and get a tree. He has decided that he is going to recreate their last Christmas together.

 _And it all began with the tree. Well… it actually began with sex on the dining room table, but..._

 _That was one of the best weeks of my life, and I have to make sure she remembers just how special it was._

"Come on, Ace. Wake up. If we don't get moving all the good ones will be gone. And we have to get decorations. I don't have any."

"How do you not have any Christmas decorations?" she asks.

"I'm usually not here. And if I am, I don't really decorate."

"So where are you usually?"

"I go to Hartford. That's the one time I will venture into my parents' house. Honor and Josh and the kids come too," he tells her.

"Oh… Did I mess up your plans? I'm sorry."

"Rory. There is no place else I'd rather be than here with you," Logan says.

She gives him a shy smile and rolls out of bed.

They go out to find a tree and stop to buy tinsel and ornaments before heading back to his flat.

"What happened to all of the ornaments you used to have?" she asks quietly as they unload the bags.

Logan looks at her hard. "I… I threw them all away."

 _I couldn't stand having any reminders of what we had been._

She nods her head, and turns away to start winding the lights around the tree.

He reaches for her forearm and spins her toward him. "Rory… I just-"

"No, I know. I got rid of some things too. It's not a big deal. That was just a really great Christmas. And it's... You know, the past is the past. And we're in Vegas right now."

Logan nods and lets go of her arm. He feels the need to explain further, but the tension is thick.

They busy themselves, silently decorating the tree.

 _I have to get this back on track. No more awkward thoughts about our past. I have to make her see all the good that's right here now._

"So I thought we would cook Christmas dinner together tomorrow. See if we've gotten any better at it."

"I know that I haven't," she laughs. "But if I remember correctly, it won't matter as long as we use the dessert for sex."

"If you want sex for dessert, I can make that happen."

* * *

On Christmas morning, Logan surprises her with her favorite Christmas movies on the couch.

"I can't believe you remembered all of this," she says.

 _I remember everything._

He just smiles and pulls her close. They watch through several movies, only stopping for their meal.

Later that night at the ending of _It's a Wonderful Life_ , Rory looks over at him and smiles. "I believe a strip tease in a Santa hat is all that's left, but I didn't bring it," she says.

Logan smirks and goes to his bedroom, returning quickly with a wrapped present.

"Lo-gan! We said no gifts," Rory protests.

"Well, this is really a gift for me," he says with a laugh, as Rory opens the box to find a lacy red bra and panties and a Santa hat.

"You are terrible," she says. "But I guess I should try it on. Just to make sure it fits."

* * *

On Boxing Day, Rory puts her tablet down long enough to study Logan across the kitchen table. He feels her eyes and looks up from his laptop.

"What?"

"I feel bad that I didn't give you anything for Christmas," she says.

"Oh, you gave me something," he says, smirking.

"Stop. You know what I mean. You've put me up here for a week, you pay for everything… I just feel a little guilty."

"Don't feel guilty," he tells her. "Money doesn't mean anything."

"Well, is there anything you want that I could do?"

 _There are so many things I want to say right now, but…_

"Stay for New Year's," he finally says.

A slow smile takes over her face. "I could probably do that. I could work on my stuff with Naomi, and… you'll just have to be okay with seeing me in the same clothes."

"That's gonna be a problem," he says. "I don't like seeing you in _any_ clothes."

And just like that, they spend the week playing house. Work during the day. Dinner and TV on the couch. Sex before snuggling to sleep.

More than once, Logan realizes that this is what his life could have been if she'd said yes.

 _I hope she feels like that too. This is not casual, and she knows it._

On New Year's Eve, they stay in with a bottle of champagne. They are kissing well before the countdown. He makes love to her as the clock strikes midnight, and he settles on his resolution.

 _To make this life permanent._

* * *

A/N: I know The Good Wife references are a little on the nose, but with the way Rory worshiped HRC, there is no way she didn't watch that show. And if you haven't seen the episode I'm talking about, Youtube it now!

This contains throwbacks to It Doesn't Happen to Every Guy and the last chapter of London, Baby if you need refreshers.

2016 will obviously take a while as well so bear with me! Let me know your thoughts in the comments.


	10. 2016

Author Note: I apologize for the delay and for the length! Logan's inner thoughts in italics.

All characters belong to Gilmore Girls, WB, and Netflix.

* * *

 **January 2016**

"Can I use your desktop?" Rory asks, sitting up and putting down her phone.

Logan glances over at her from his side of the bed. "Of course."

She disappears for a while, returning almost an hour later.

"You didn't have to wait up," Rory says.

He puts his book down. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," she says softly. "Just some edits on my piece for The Atlantic."

Logan sits up. "Doesn't that publish this month? What edits could they possibly want this late?"

"They want to shift the tone slightly. You know… because language is a little more… coarse right now. More vitriolic," Rory explains. She purses her lips. "I just… That's not really my style."

"Well, what did your agent say?" Logan asks.

"I don't actually have an agent at the moment."

"What?" Logan says incredulously. "How do you get any freelance work without an agent?"

"I have a lot of connections, and I just felt that I couldn't justify the cost of an agent."

"What about your trust fund?"

"I'm keeping that for emergencies. Rent. Food. Digital articles don't pay as well as print, and I need to be prepared for the day when there is no money coming in."

 _Wow. Her financial situation is worse than I thought._

"You know there are a litany of agents at HPG that would kill for a writer of your caliber," he says.

"Logan, you know I can't do that. It's not a big deal. I just need to shift my verbiage a little. You go to bed. I know you have to get up early."

A few hours later, he is awakened to the sound of Rory tap-dancing downstairs.

 _I knew she was more worried about this than she let on._

He has learned over the last few weeks not to bother her when she tap-dances, so he rolls over and attempts to go back to sleep.

 _I wish she would let me help her._

* * *

That night over dinner, he attempts to broach the subject.

"I heard you tap-dancing last night-"

"I'm sorry-"

"No. I just hate to see you this worried. What can I do?" he asks.

"Nothing. I promise that everything is fine," she deflects.

Logan sighs loudly. "Well, if you don't want to talk to me, you still need to talk to someone. What does Lorelei think?"

"I haven't talked to her in a while," Rory admits.

"Really? When's the last time you went home?"

"The week Grandpa died," she says quietly.

 _Woah. That's been months._

"You know I've learned from experience that things get sideways when you aren't talking to Lorelei. Are you fighting?"

"No, not all," she says, pausing for a moment. "Do you ever feel like you're disappointing people?"

Logan actually laughs out loud. "Every day. You remember my family, right? But I'm sure Lorelei is not-"

"No, she's not. It's the exact opposite. She and Luke are _so_ proud of me, and I really haven't done anything to deserve it. And that makes me disappointed in myself. I can't tell her that my career is floundering."

"Rory. You have got to cut yourself some slack. You're a freelancer, which is hard enough, but you're doing it without an agent, which is close to impossible. And you just published a very well-received Talk of the Town. You should be proud of that."

Rory leans forward and kisses his lips sweetly. "Thanks."

He grabs his laptop and opens his browser. "What's your schedule like this week?"

"It's pretty light. Why?"

"Because you're going to Stars Hollow to see Lorelei."

"Oh. Are you sick of me already?" she asks with a smile.

He gives her a knowing look. "Of course not. But you need this."

He is booking her flight when his phone rings.

Rory picks it up and hands it to him. "Odette," she says quietly.

Logan looks up from the computer and sighs. "Decline." He finishes buying her ticket and says "I need to tell you about Odette."

"No, you don't. We're in Vegas."

"Rory-"

"Logan, I don't want to know."

"But-"

She cuts him off again. "I _don't_ want to know."

 _I'm engaged. People think I am getting married. I need to be upfront about this._

"It's just that-"

"Do you want to stop seeing each other?"

"You know I don't," he says.

" _That's_ all I need to know," she says.

 _I'm all for burying my head in the sand too._

 _But this is not something I can keep secret. I've got to talk to Odette and see how quickly we can get out of this._

* * *

The next night at The Ivy, Logan waits until dessert is placed on the table to bring the conversation back to his main concern.

"You're leaving me tomorrow. According to our rules, I need to know when you're coming back."

"I feel compelled to remind you that _you_ booked this flight for me to leave. But… I also spoke with Naomi's agent this afternoon and she wants to meet on Thursday, so I'll be coming right back," Rory says.

Logan grins. "You waited all night to tell me this?"

"Seemed trivial," Rory scoffs. "But I was thinking, I can get a hotel room. I've been here for over two weeks, and I don't want to cramp your style."

Logan rolls his eyes. "You're staying with me." He reaches across the table for her hand.

Her eyes quickly dart around, surveying the scene, before she takes his hand.

 _One more month, she'll be past all of this. I'm sure of it._

"Then it's settled. I'll give you a spare key when we get home so that you can just let yourself back in," Logan says.

"That doesn't sound very Vegas-y," she says.

 _Neither does almost three straight weeks together…_

"Then just shoo the hookers out and flush all of the blow when you get there," Logan says.

* * *

On Tuesday morning, Logan is awakened by the ping of a text message. He groggily reaches over to his bedside table and opens the message.

It is a picture of Rory in the red bra he gave her for Christmas accompanied by:

 **Are you up yet?**

His eyes pop open, and he feels his whole body awaken. Logan swings his legs over the side of the bed, his eyes still intent on the racy selfie.

 _Wow. This is a new move for her._

He heads into the bathroom, arranges himself in his boxer briefs, and takes a quick shot of the mirror.

 **I am now.**

As he heads back to bed, he grabs his tablet to Facetime her.

She answers quickly. "Hey!"

"Hey. Nice outfit."

"Yeah, I found it in my suitcase, and… it makes me feel pretty. And sexy," she says.

"Well, you _are_ pretty and sexy," he flirts. "Why aren't you asleep?"

"I just can't. Jetlag, I guess. I tap-danced… and had coffee with Mom-"

"Wow. I can't believe you didn't pass out immediately," he quips.

"Hush. But I do know something that always gives me amazing sleep," she says.

Logan smirks.

 _We can't even be apart for one night. She has to see that._

"Good idea," he says, reaching down to touch himself.

"You like that?" she asks coyly.

"You know I do."

"How much?"

"This much," he says, sliding out of his underwear. He pans his tablet down until Rory has a good view of his hard-on and tugs on himself a few times, smiling when he hears her gasp.

He brings the picture back up to his face. Rory's eyes are closed, lips slightly parted.

He props his tablet up on a pillow and rolls onto his side. "Open your eyes," he whispers.

She slowly does, her big blue eyes clouded with lust. Logan inhales deeply and picks up speed on himself.

"Show me," he says.

Her face flushes, but she shifts her phone until all Logan can see are Rory's red lacy panties, her hand moving furiously inside.

"Fuck, Rory," he groans.

They continue on, whispering and touching, teasing and showing, until they both topple over the edge.

Once he has his breath back, Logan says "Do you think when techs created Facetime, they thought they were going to revolutionize phone sex? How great would this have been when we…" His voice trails off.

It is silent for a moment. Finally, Rory says "We did pretty well without it."

"Yeah. We did," Logan agrees. "Do you think you can sleep now?"

She nods.

"I'll see you tomorrow. Sweet dreams, Ace."

He hangs up, then lies in bed for a while.

 _Fuck. I'm in love with her. Again._

 _That did not take long._

 _I've got to end this engagement. I've got to call Odette today._

He heads to the shower to start getting ready for work.

He does not call Odette.

* * *

On Thursday, Logan heads home after his lunchtime session with his trainer. He normally showers at the gym, but he wants to hear about Rory's meeting with Naomi. He steps out of the elevator and catches sight of her opening the door.

"Ace!" he calls down the corridor, jogging to catch up to her.

"What are you doing home?" she asks.

He catches up to her at the door and kisses her sweetly. "I wanted to hear about your meeting. Wow… You look great."

 _White lace works for her. Good to know._

"Thank you," she says, crinkling up her nose.

"I know. I stink. Let me shower, and then you can tell me all about it. I don't have anything until two, so we've got a little time." He drops his gym bag and rushes up the stairs, not wanting to miss any of this stolen time with her. He is in and out of the shower quickly, wrapping a towel around his waist.

"Logan, can you come here for a sec?"

"Everything okay?" he asks, peeking his head out to the living room.

Rory is sitting on the couch, dress gone, clad in only her bra and panties. Her legs are crossed seductively, her feet still encased in her high heels. She stands when she sees him.

 _Jesus Christ._

 _Welp. Gonna miss that 2:00._

"Meeting must've gone well," he says with a smirk.

He saunters over to her, and with a quick flick of her wrist, his towel is down at his feet. She pushes him down to his knees and sits back down in front of him, drawing one leg up and hooking it around his head.

"God, I love it when you boss me around."

She smiles. "Get to work, Huntzberger."

He smirks before pulling her panties to the side and diving in.

* * *

"Okay. Done with shower number two. Tell me about your meeting while I get dressed," Logan says thirty minutes later. He pulls on a pair of boxer briefs and digs into the recently delivered dry cleaning hanging over the closet door.

 _I am going to be so late._

 _Totally worth it._

He hears Rory launch into the recount of her meeting as he begins to put on his pants.

 _Bourbon during the day? No wonder she was so forward._

He finds a shirt that will work and pulls it on.

 _I hate that she's always so worried about money._

"So basically I just had a really good day. How was your day?" she asked.

 _I just went down on you until you were screaming my name, so…_

"I had my dry cleaning delivered," he says cheekily, re-entering the living room. _Oh, she's dressed too. Boo._

She smiles. "Oh, I think I win."

"I don't know," he quips. "I really like these pants, so..." He leans down to kiss her. "I'm glad it went well," Logan says sincerely.

"It did."

He kisses her again. "Tonight, I will take you out to celebrate."

"I'd like that."

He can't stop kissing her. "And tomorrow I'll tell you all the things I've heard about Naomi Shropshire." He heads to his bed and grabs his jacket and tie, listening to Rory insist that she doesn't mind 'difficult' or 'weird'.

"If it comes together, it could be great. And you deserve that," he tells her.

"I do," she agrees. "I do deserve that."

He loops his tie as Rory continues on, detailing Naomi's eccentricities.

"Weird makes good copy," Rory insists.

"So does a good writer," he counters.

"Those pants did put you in a good mood!"

She stands, so he takes the opportunity to kiss her again.

"Do you really have to go back to work?" she asks.

 _Unfortunately, I'm already going to be about an hour late._ "I can't let the pants be the main accomplishment of my day. Plus, I have competition now. You're going to be an author."

"It's not like I'm John McPhee or anything," she says.

 _Always self-deprecating._

"Yet," he admonishes. "I'll send the car for you at eight." He gathers up his things and gets ready to head back.

"I'm gonna use your desktop, okay?"

"All yours."

"Hey, where are those boxes that I had sent here?" she asks.

He slips into his jacket. "I think the maid stuffed them into the closet."

"I need to look for something," she murmurs quietly,

"Your lucky outfit?" he guesses.

"Do not mock!"

"I am not mocking," he says with a laugh. "It's a great outfit. You were wearing it when I saw you in Hamburg."

She smiles sweetly before heading toward the hall.

"Hey, is there anything in here that you do not want me to see?" she asks.

 _She's been here for weeks. What does she think I'm hiding?_

"Like, body parts?"

"That would be on the list, sure," she says, closing the closet door and returning back to him. "No, like, uh… other girls' things."

 _How can she possibly think I'm seeing other people when she basically lives with me?_

"All clear," he says, with just a hint of sarcasm. But thinking on it, he feels the need for sincerity and not snark. "Hey… I wouldn't do that. You know… leave things around for you to just…"

"I wasn't accusing," she backtracks.

"I know. I'm just…" he trails off, unsure of how much of his feelings he can let Rory hear.

"Look. We have an agreement. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas."

"We do," he sighs. _Apparently, she's still not ready yet to hear any of my feelings._

She turns back to the closet, but quickly pivots to continue justifying their situation. "And when we leave Vegas, we forget about Vegas… until we're back in Vegas… and then it's just us in Vegas until we're not. Throw me a rope here, man."

 _Just play it off like you're totally fine that she still thinks this Vegas bullshit still applies._

He smiles and kisses her again. "I'll see you at eight," he says in his bedroom voice. Her eyes melt before she turns back to start going through his closet.

 _Okay, it's fine. She obviously doesn't mean this stuff either. Not when she looks at me like that._

Rory's personal cell vibrates on the table beside him, distracting him from his thoughts. He glances down, and-

 _What the fuck?_

"Your phone," he says picking it up.

"What's it say?"

"Paul. Dinner. Don't forget." _Who the fuck is Paul?_

"Oh, crap," she says.

' _Oh crap' because I saw it, or 'Oh crap' because she forgot, or 'Oh crap' because she misses him?_

"That's a lot of exclamation points."

 _Mother fucker._

 _Pull it together. Quick._

"I forgot," she says.

"It was all the excitement about my pants," he snarks, trying to keep a lid on his emotions.

"Go," she says.

"But-"

"Vegas."

"Yes. Vegas." _Fucking Vegas._

He grabs his briefcase and hurries down the stairs, desperate to get away from her before she sees how upset he is.

Just as he opens the door, Rory calls to him from the top of the stairs. "Logan?"

He looks back to her.

"You shouldn't call the pants the main accomplishment of your day. I mean you just gave the best orgasm I've had since… well, since the last one you gave me."

He can't help it. He breaks into a smile. "I'll see you tonight."

"Can't wait."

But the smile fades when he gets into the back of a cab.

 _Who is Paul? And how can she_ _ **not**_ _see that in no way, shape, or form is this relationship like Vegas?_

* * *

 **February 2016**

Odette comes into the kitchen and opens up the refrigerator with a sigh. She closes it without selecting anything.

"What's wrong with you?" Logan asks, stirring a sweetener into his coffee.

"I'm having lunch with Papá today, and I'm anxious."

"Yeah, he was asking me last week about the wedding. Sorry, but I told him I was leaving everything up to you," Logan says.

"Does he bother you about it often?" she asks.

"No. Not since the blow up a few months ago. He seems calm, and… He's been giving me a fair amount of space."

She sighs again. "They want me to move here. They think that being in Paris is what's keeping us from moving forward."

Logan eyes her.

 _Are we going to let it get this far? If she moves to London…_

"What about Henri?" he finally asks.

"I don't know. Everything just feels very out of my control right now. Henri, my job, this."

"Yeah, me too," he says.

"What do you mean? You always seem like you have it all together," Odette says.

"I mean… I'm not really being pro-active on any front. I'm just letting my life happen to me. I'm waiting on Rory to make up her mind. And I'm not good at it. It's making me antsy. I like to go after what I want."

"I remember," she smiles.

He looks at her closely, but she doesn't seem sad or wistful.

 _It_ _ **is**_ _strange that we used to be so easily intimate physically, and now we barely make any contact._

"I'm sorry. Is this awkward?" Odette asks. "We don't have to talk about this stuff."

"Actually this whole thing is getting weird. At some point, we are either going to have to call off this engagement or get married," he says.

"Oui," she says matter-of-factly.

Logan leaves the kitchen, and they don't speak about it again.

* * *

 **March 2016**

Logan gives his cab driver the address to Rory's hotel in Boston. He leans back in the seat and closes his eyes, the whirlwind chain of events that led him here finally catching up with him.

After a quick ride, he exits the cab, slings his bag over his shoulder, and heads in. He unsuccessfully tries to charm the receptionist into giving up Rory's room number and has to settle for them calling her down. He anxiously waits in the vestibule.

"Oh my God! Logan!" she cries stepping off the elevator and laying eyes on him. She runs toward him and flings herself into his arms. "What are you doing here? When I talked to you last night I thought you were in London!"

He breathes in the intoxicating scent of her shampoo and sighs against her hair. "I was. But I realized how much I missed you, so I got out of bed and drove to the airport."

She pulls away from him to study his face. "I missed you too," she admits. "You must be exhausted. Let's go upstairs."

"How's the story going?" Logan asks as they make their way to Rory's room.

"Good. You always hear that Boston people can be kind of… rude, I guess, but people have been very willing to talk to me."

Logan smiles. "You're talking to Irish people about the St. Patrick's Day parade. There is probably nothing they would rather talk about."

"Yeah, you're probably right. Sit down for a minute," she says.

He drops his bag and lies down on the bed, taking her hand and pulling her with him. He snuggles her tight. "This was a good idea," he whispers into her temple. "Two months is too long for us to go without seeing each other."

Rory doesn't respond, and Logan panics.

 _Why do I keep forgetting that she is not as into this as I am? She's got… fucking Paul… and who knows who else. I feel really pathetic right now… This was a stupid idea._

He loosens his grip on her and rolls away slightly.

"No. Come back," she whispers, tightening her arms around his waist. "It _has_ been too long. I've missed you."

 _I can't help it. I'll take whatever I can get._

Logan breathes a sigh of relief and relaxes in her arms.

Two hours later, Logan opens his eyes and squints around the room. Rory is sitting at the desk, typing away on her laptop.

"Hey… How long have I been asleep?" he asks.

"Oh, you're awake!" Rory finishes what she is doing and closes her laptop. "A couple of hours. Do you want to go get dinner?"

"It's dinnertime already? Wow. Yeah. I just… Do I have time for a shower?"

"Of course," she says.

"Wanna join me?"

"Oh… um, I can't," she stammers. "This is not… um … a good week for me."

"Oh. Yeah, no big deal." He sees Rory's blush intensify, so he continues. "Ace, come on. It's fine."

"I just feel bad. You came all this way," she says.

"Good thing we're more than just sex," he says.

 _Shit. I've got to stop saying this stuff until she is ready to hear it._

But he is surprised when Rory smiles and nods at him. "Yeah."

The smile spreads from his mouth to his eyes before he takes her hand and says "Doesn't mean we can't fool around."

She smiles and follows him to the bathroom.

* * *

After dinner, Rory and Logan are walking through Boston Common, their gloved fingers intertwined.

Logan's heart is heavy as he ponders whether this is the right time to have this conversation.

 _The whole flight here I kept thinking "What if she has some other guy here?" "What if she doesn't want me to do romantic things anymore?"_

 _But how can I be so jealous and possessive of her when I'm engaged to someone else?_

 _I have to tell her the truth. I just have to._

"Can we sit for a minute?" Logan asks, brushing some snow off a bench and pulling Rory down next to him.

"Wow! This bench is so cold, I feel like Ted Williams," she says.

Logan doesn't even smile.

"Come on. No props for the sports reference? What's wrong? Is… Do you want…?" Rory begins.

"I have to tell you something, and I need you to just let me say it," Logan says.

"Okay."

"It's about Odette."

"Logan, I told you. You don't owe me any explanations."

He hangs his head for a moment.

 _How can I say this so that she'll understand?_

"Unless… Are you getting serious with her? Do you need to stop seeing me?" Rory asks, and Logan can hear a hint of desperation in her voice.

"I do _not_ want to stop seeing you. I need you to remember that. But I have to tell you… that Odette and I are engaged." He looks at Rory trying to gauge her reaction.

"Engaged? Like 'to be married' engaged?" she asks.

Logan slowly nods. "It's… our families pushed for it. We don't want to get married, and I'm trying to figure out ways around it. I promise, Rory. It's nothing like when I wanted to marry…" _You._

Rory doesn't say anything. She just continues looking into her lap like the answers will come from there.

He normally feels like he knows her pretty well, but right now he can't read her at all.

"Rory-"

"How long have you been engaged?" she interrupts him.

He swallows hard. "Since July."

"July? Oh my God," she says, voice rising. She drops his hand and walks away from the bench. He watches her until she pivots and circles back to stand in front of him.

"So she's not… I mean… God. When is the wedding?" she asks, sounding like she may burst into tears at any moment.

 _She cares. I knew it._

"We don't have a date," Logan says, standing and taking Rory's hands again. "We don't want to do it. I'm going to get out of it." He repeats this for himself as much as he does for Rory.

"Okay… Okay… You're engaged. That's… Wow… Okay. I'm going to walk back. I need you to give me a little time," she says.

He nods morosely.

She turns to leave, but he grabs her arm and spins her back around. "Rory, you know that I…"

 _Do not tell her you love her. Do_ _ **not**_ _do it._

"I don't want this to be the end," he finishes.

She nods and turns to head back to the hotel. Logan slumps back unto the frozen bench.

 _That did not go well. But I'm not sure how I thought it could go better._

 _I guess I was fooling myself to think that she'd beg me to break it off with Odette. That she wouldn't be able to stand the thought of me being with anyone else._

The temperature is continuing to drop so Logan heads into the first bar he sees, sitting down with a scotch.

The pain is palpable. His heart hurts more than he thought it would.

 _Finn warned me this was stupid. That I was going to get my heart broken again._

His phone buzzes with a text.

 **Come back.**

 _I don't want to go. Right now, she's still my girl, but if I go back, she may hand me my bag and tell me to get lost._

But he has no other option, so he finishes his scotch and heads back out into the cold.

His heart is pounding when he knocks on the hotel door. Rory opens it, and he tries desperately to maintain his stoicism.

"I'm sorry I left you out there," she says. "I was mad that you didn't tell me, but I know I haven't really let you. I just… needed a little time to think, and I've decided…"

 _Dear God, please don't let her leave me._

"I don't see why we can't keep things the way they've been. I don't want this to be the end either. So let's just keep seeing each other until… we can't."

Logan finally exhales and wraps her up in his arms.

"Oh, you're freezing!" she squeals. "Let me warm you up."

And even as his heart is quietly calming down, his head is screaming.

" _Until we can't"? What does that mean? Is she just willing to let me marry someone else? I would_ _ **never**_ _let her marry someone else._

But as she tips her face up to kiss him, these thoughts fade away, and all he can think is how much he loves her.

* * *

 **April 2016**

"Halfway through her third martini, she asked if she could lick my juicy apple cheeks!" Rory says.

"Ooh, do I want to know what that means?" Logan asks.

 _Though I would like to lick your juicy apple cheeks too._

"My brain is fried," she sighs.

"Well, let's talk about something else," he offers.

"Oh, Conde Nast. Just got the message. Pushed again."

Logan looks up in disbelief. "You're kidding."

"I know I'm not their highest priority, but Conde Nast asked for this meeting. Months ago. This came from them."

 _I wonder if she'll let me-_

"Conde Nast?" his father's voice booms from beside him as he pulls up a chair. "Procrastinators supreme. May I?" he asks, before grabbing a French fry off of Rory's plate.

 _What the hell is he doing here?_

 _Okay. Calm down, play it cool._

"Help yourself," Logan says watching Rory closely.

Mitchum continues. "How ya doing, Rory? Long time, no see."

Rory's face flushes as she responds. "It's been a very long time."

"I didn't know you two were still in touch," Mitchum says.

Logan takes a measured breath. "Rory was passing through town on a job, and I begged her to have lunch." He looks up and gives her a tight smile.

"Hmm. Nothing better to do?" Mitchum asks her, all the while popping fries in his mouth.

"He did beg," she says with a fake laugh.

Logan continues to internally freak out, while he hears his father offer to fix Rory's Conde Nast problem.

 _Oh, shut up. She doesn't need_ _ **you**_ _to be her savior._

 _I need to be her savior._

"I gotta go," Mitchum says.

 _Finally. I can't believe I made it through that with almost no bruises._

"Um, hey, the party next week for your uncle… Is Odette coming?" Mitchum asks.

 _Oh, fuck you._

"She will be there," Logan responds through gritted teeth.

Mitchum turns to Rory. "Gets engaged to a girl who lives in another country. Smart girl."

 _Fuck you times ten._

 _This is a disaster. I've just gotten her okay with the engagement._

"And Conde Nast. The offer stands," Mitchum says to her.

"You're very nice. Thank you," Rory says with a smile.

"I believe that's the first time anyone's ever said that to me," Mitchum quips. "I mean someone not sticking a shiv in my back. Ha, ha. See ya."

Logan watches him leave before taking a big gulp of his wine.

"How did this happen?" Rory cries.

"It's okay," he says, trying not to let his own panic show.

"He's seen us!"

"As far as he knows, we're just friends," Logan says.

"Of all the millions of restaurants, he walks in here?" she asks.

Logan pauses and then turns back to his plate. _Just let that lie._

"What?" she asks.

He sighs. "It's one of the family holdings."

"Of course it is."

 _I've got to lighten this back up. Because everything is_ _ **fine**_ _._

"Why do you think I sprung for the three hundred dollar bottle of wine?" Logan asks, smirking.

But Rory doesn't smile back. She glances at Mitchum again. He can tell from her body language that she's shaken.

"Ace?" he asks quietly. She doesn't respond, so he continues. "It's okay, I promise. I'll talk to Mitchum. Make sure he doesn't-"

"I'm going to go to the rest room." She stands abruptly, grabs her purse and takes off.

Logan sets his glass of wine down and leans back in his chair, exhaling loudly.

 _I can't let her be alone right now. She will twist this into something it's not._

He rushes out of the dining area towards the restrooms, but catches sight of her out the front window. He chases her onto the street.

"Rory! Where are you going?"

She stops, slowly turning around. "I'm sorry. I had to get out of there. Your father has always had a way of making me feel so small. And he just hit me with the double whammy- my career _and_ …" she trails off, unable to commit it to words.

 _Your relationship with me._

"Ace. Your career is going to be fine. You're too talented for it not to be. And as for the other…" He is terrified to vocalize her actual place in his life. But he's even more terrified to let her walk away without knowing the truth. "You know how I feel about you."

She nods slowly. "I'm still going to go. I'll see you tonight, okay?"

He feels helpless watching her walk away from him. Pivoting quickly, he strides back into the restaurant, ready to lay into Mitchum, public audience be damned.

But Mitchum is no longer in the bar.

 _Ugh… I've got no place to put all this anger._

He finds his server to settle up his tab, and takes a car back to the office, his mind racing a mile a minute.

 _What can I say to make her feel better? Would it help or hurt to tell her that she's the only one I want?_

 _Maybe it's time to end this with Odette for real. She's a big girl, and she'll just have to deal with the fall out._

 _And I can handle anything as long as I've got Rory._

 _But do I really have Rory?_

 _It's been months, and she's still made no overtures to end this Vegas agreement._

He walks into his office and finds Mitchum sitting there waiting for him.

"When did you get in town?" Logan asks.

"Last night. I probably should've let you know, but surprising you with your mistress was so much more fun."

"We're just friends, Dad."

"Yeah. Um-hmm. You know, most men wait until after they are actually _married_ to start having affairs."

Logan sits down at his desk silently.

"I seem to remember," Mitchum continues, "a time when you insisted to me that you weren't a cheater. Or did that just mean cheating _on_ Rory, not cheating _with_ Rory?"

Logan glares at him, but says nothing.

"You're playing with fire, son."

Logan finally cracks. "You were the one who told me that if I got engaged to Odette my life wouldn't have to change."

"Well, parading your little fling into a crowded restaurant in the middle of the day is not the way you go about it. What if Jean had walked in there instead of me?" Mitchum asks. "And honestly Logan, a fling outside of your marriage only works if your heart isn't in it."

"Dad-"

"I watched you two for a few minutes before I came over, and this is no casual thing. You need to end this now. You are going to marry Odette. You are going to raise a family with Odette."

"You do understand that you can't actually force me to do any of that." Logan taunts him.

Mitchum stands up, buttoning his blazer, casting a stern gaze down at Logan. "Do not embarrass this family. Do what you're supposed to do. You should face the fact that you're not going to end up with Rory Gilmore. Because if I remember correctly, you already tried that. And she said no."

His father's words hit him like a punch in the gut. He is silent as Mitchum strides out of his office.

He turns on his computer and begins going through the motions. Checking emails, returning phone calls. Anything to keep from admitting to himself that his father is probably right.

* * *

When he gets home later that night, he finds Rory curled up on the sofa with a magazine and a cup of coffee. She looks up at him with a shy smile.

"You're late tonight," she says.

"I didn't know if you'd want me around, so I went out for a drink with Will and Rowan."

"Oh. Are they your Colin and Finn in London? Helping you pick up chicks, and-"

"Rory. I don't want to fight," he says.

"Are we fighting?"

He takes off his jacket and goes to sit by her. "What happened today-"

"I'm sorry I freaked out," she says, interrupting him. "I know in my mind that you're marrying Odette, but it just threw me to hear your father say it out loud. And she's going to family events with you, and it kind of made me feel… trashy."

He pulls her close to kiss her. "Baby, you know that's not what this is. That's not what we are."

"Are you drunk?"

"Yep," he says, kissing her again. "It's not a family party. It's my 'Uncle' Nigel. Dad's friend. Board member. Just work stuff. That's what Odette is coming for. And I'm not going to marry her."

 _I've had a lot of scotch tonight. And everything feels fuzzy, but something has become very clear._

 _I'm going down with this ship._

He is reminded of the Dido song from high school that he always thought was pathetic.

 _It's not pathetic. Some loves are just worth going down for._

He lays his head down in her lap and falls asleep to the touch of her fingertips on his forehead.

* * *

 **May 2016**

Logan moves his tablet aside so that Rory can settle into his lap. He tries to hold in his laughter as she continually argues with Naomi Shropshire about a rabbit and a mouse.

Finally, Rory sighs and hangs up the phone.

"Come on. The suspense is killing me. Is she the mouse or the whale?"

"It doesn't matter. Next time she'll be a mongoose, or a pangolin, or a piece of fruit, and it'll be my fault for not remembering," Rory rants.

Logan can't help but laugh.

"What did you think?" she asks gesturing toward his tablet.

"Sandee Says?"

 _I need to be honest, but give her as much encouragement as I can._

"The layout's pretty good. Design catches your eye."

"And attacks it with pretty, pretty colors," Rory snarks.

 _Yeah…_

"It's an interesting mix of sweet and sour. Gets a little catty and gossipy. Not that I don't like gossip," Logan continues.

"Well… how many steps down is it from the New Yorker, or GQ, or Huffington, or Bazooka Comics?" she asks.

 _Honestly…_

"A few below the first three. But I love that they want you," he says sincerely. "It could mean they're looking to class up the joint a bit."

Rory gives him the look that always gives him hope, and he kisses her temple.

 _Now is the time when I should whisper "But no matter what,_ _ **I**_ _want you, and everything will be fine."_

But he refrains, knowing how vulnerable his words will make him to her. Over the last week, he has done a good job of straddling the line between fling and love, and he doesn't want to push it now at the end of her visit. But as he gets up to head back to the office, Rory surprises him.

"Hey, I was thinking. I don't have to head back to the States so soon."

"Yeah?" Logan perks up.

"Yeah, there's nothing pressing. I could hang a couple of more days," she continues.

 _But you know Odette is coming for Nigel's retirement party._

 _Is she pushing this because she's ready to commit to me? Or has she just forgotten, and I'm fooling myself again?_

"Are you leaving town?" she asks.

 _She knows the answers here. What is she playing at?_

He stares at her for a minute.

"Someone's coming to town?" she alters her question.

"Kind of," he replies, with just a hint of sarcasm.

"Odette?"

"Kind of," he says, full sarcasm.

"Right, so I guess I'll go," she says.

 _Don't go. Just tell me that you want to stay for me, and not just because you have nothing better to do. Tell me that, and I'll never let Odette step foot back into this flat._

"Ivy tonight?" he asks.

"Our traditional farewell meal."

"I'll send the car at eight."

"Eight is great," she agrees.

He turns to head down the stairs.

 _I know she wants me. I know she wants this. But I need her to ask me for it._

 _I asked the last time, and it ruined my life for the next eight years. It's her turn._ _ **She's**_ _got to take a chance this time._

He gives her space all day, foregoing the normal texts and calls. He wants her to really think about what they will lose here if they don't admit what they want.

Logan gets to the Ivy around 7:30 and starts on the wine. By 8:20, he is panicking because Rory is a no-show.

 _I'm so stupid. Why am I forcing her hand? Why not just let her to stay, and tell Odette to stay in a hotel._

When Rory walks into the restaurant, his relief is palpable.

"I'm sorry I'm late," she says, kissing his cheek. "And I'm sorry about earlier." She quickly sits down across from him, picking up her napkin and placing it in her lap. "I forgot all about the retirement party. I did not mean to make it so awkward," she continues with a nervous laugh. "I mean, Vegas is Vegas, and you have your own life just like I have my own life…"

He nods slowly. "And that's still how you want it?"

Her eyes narrow slightly. "Is that not what you want?"

 _I'm willing to do whatever I have to do._

"Vegas is fine," he lies. "You just let me know when it doesn't work for _you_ anymore."

She smiles and takes a sip of her wine.

* * *

Later that night, he stops kissing her long enough to ask "When are you coming back?"

"I don't know," she sighs. "Everything with Naomi is falling apart. I should probably concentrate on some of my other projects for a bit."

"I don't like that."

She smiles. "I know, but I can probably get back here later in the summer. Maybe July or August."

"August? That's too far away, but I know something we could do then that you would love. I'll get the tickets, so plan on being here."

"What is it?" she asks.

"Nope. I want it to be a surprise."

"You won't tell me?"

He shakes his head and laughs.

"Fine. You always do the best surprises."

* * *

 **June 2016**

Logan comes home from work to find Odette sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Hey. What are you doing here? Did I forget-"

"No, no. And I'm sorry to just show up," she says. She looks up at him, and he can tell from her red-rimmed eyes that she has been crying.

"What's going on? Are you okay?" he asks, dropping his bag and moving toward her.

"Nothing. I just needed to get out of Paris for a bit. Is it alright that I'm here? Rory's not here, is she?"

"No, it's fine. She's in the States. You're sure you're alright?"

"Oui."

He doesn't press her. He's not her boyfriend, and it's not his place. But he does feel bad for her, so he orders her favorite takeout for dinner and opens a new bottle of wine. They sit silently for a while until eventually she opens up.

"Henri and I broke up."

"What happened?"

"It's just too much. The mood swings. The drugs. A little cocaine at a party is one thing, but… I asked him to stop, but he won't. I guess I'm just not enough to make him happy."

"I'm sure that's not true. I'm sure he'll call you within the week and tell you how much he wants you to come home," Logan says, although he's entirely unsure if this is true. In actuality, he knows next to nothing about her relationship.

She shakes her head. "He told me to go ahead and marry you."

 _Ouch._

"I'm going up to bed," she says leaving the kitchen table.

Logan finishes eating and cleans the kitchen quickly. Once upstairs, he finds the door to the guest room closed tight, so he doesn't bother her. He goes about his business, and it's almost like she's not there.

A few nights later, Odette enters his room and crawls up unto his bed. Logan sets his book down and asks "You okay?"

"You were right. He wants me to come home."

"That's good, right? That's what you want?" he asks her.

"I'm not sure anymore. Maybe, no matter how much I love him, he's not good for me anymore," she says.

He's not sure what to say to that; it's not a pleasant thought, and it makes him contemplate his own situation.

Eventually Odette falls asleep, right on the side of the bed she used to. Logan thinks about waking her to send her back to the guest room, but decides against it.

 _She's had a rough few days. I should let her sleep. And it's not like I'll even notice she's here in a bed this big._

 _It's not like when I sleep with Rory, and she's all over me._

He places a marker in his book and turns off his light before rolling onto his stomach and falling asleep.

He is awakened by the phone ringing on his bedside table. He grabs it quickly to find Rory calling.

"Hey there," he says, groggily.

"Oh shoot," she says. "Did I wake you up? I woke you up. It's two A.M. there."

He turns on his light and reassures her. "No, no, no. It's fine. I'm up. Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I'm… I just… Um," she stammers.

 _She's not okay. She's breaking up with me._

"What?" he prods.

"I really hate to do this."

 _Shit. Here it comes._

 _Have a little pride here, Logan. Take it like a man._

"What?" he asks again. "Come on."

"Um… Would your father still be willing to put in a good word for me at Conde Nast?"

 _Oh… Thank God._

"Absolutely."

"It's okay if he won't. I mean, I don't even know how serious he was," she rambles.

"No, he'll do it for sure." Logan tries to keep his voice even, so that Rory can't detect the tangible relief in it. "He does stuff like this all the time for lesser mortals."

"I really didn't want to do it this way," she says, and he can hear the regret already building in her.

"Don't be embarrassed."

"I'm not," she says. "Pride's a little hurt."

"Well then get over it. I'll give you a text when it's done. Okay? Be happy."

 _ **I'm**_ _happy. If she settles her career, maybe she can settle on me._

"I'm happy. Oops, hold on," she says.

"What?"

"Oh, uh… No, I just thought the baby was gonna throw up."

 _What?_

"Your life change a lot since I last saw you?" he quips.

"It's Paris's kid. I'm babysitting," she explains.

 _Got it. But more importantly, once we set this meeting-_

"Did you find your lucky outfit, Ace?" he asks.

"There is no sign. Thank you again. And thank your father for me."

"No problem. Really."

 _I like doing things for you. I_ _ **want**_ _to do things for you._

"All right. Well, I guess I should uh, let you get back… to bed," she says.

At the mention of his bed, he remembers that Odette is asleep there, and he looks back to make sure he is not waking her. "Okay, I'll let you know, Ace. And… good luck."

"Thanks, Logan."

He hangs up, realizing he is wide awake.

 _Might as well call Mitchum now._

He heads down to the kitchen so as not to disturb Odette and calls his father.

"Son. Everything alright? Isn't it the middle of the night for you?" Mitchum barks.

"Yeah, but I'm awake," he hurries through his words, not really wanting to give this time for discussion. "I wanted to ask you if you thought you could talk to Conde Nast on Rory's behalf. They're still dicking her around, and…"

He hears the sigh all the way across the Atlantic.

"That's still going on?" Mitchum finally asks.

Logan ignores him. "You yourself told her you could make it happen. You know she's a talented writer, and she just needs to have the door opened for her."

"I can make it happen. I'll call tomorrow. But I need you to be smarter here. I need you to-"

"Will you just let me know when you talk to them?" Logan interrupts. "Thanks, Dad. I owe you one."

"Yes, you do. And I know what I want, and I'm going to collect soon."

Logan hangs up on him and texts Rory.

 **Mitchum will call them tomorrow. Find that outfit!**

She replies back quickly.

 **You're the best!**

* * *

The next Saturday, he comes in from his run and hears Odette shouting in French. He walks slowly up the stairs unsure if her mother or father are there.

But it turns out that she is on the phone, and she heads into the guest room when she sees him enter. She shuts the door, but he can still hear her yelling.

He takes a shower and goes about his day, though he is constantly listening out for Odette.

She finally comes out of her room a few hours later and says "I don't want to talk about it."

He tries to respect her space, but for days at a time, Logan can hear nothing but screaming and crying through her bedroom door.

After a week of this, she finally tells Logan "I don't think I can go back. I can't live like this."

"Yeah, and honestly I can't live like this either. I can't listen to it anymore. Just stay here until we can figure out what you're going to do, but for God's sake, stop taking his calls," he tells her.

More of her things arrive the next week, and before he knows it, Odette is living with him.

* * *

 **July 2016**

Logan hangs up the phone and takes a sip of coffee.

He has been working in the middle of the night for three straight days, and he's exhausted. He refreshes his email over and over until he sees the documents he's waiting for.

He scans through the wording, making sure that everything is as they had discussed. Needing a break, he is thrilled when his cell rings with a call from Rory.

He opens with a tirade on China and time zones, but he slows down as he realizes something is off with her.

"Hey, I know I'm coming out in a couple of weeks, but…"

"Oh, come on, don't cancel on me now," he says, firing off another email. "I've got Matilda tickets, planned pony rides, there's a freak show in town!"

"No, not cancelling. I just thought… Well. I'm not really doing much of anything these days, and I'm a little bored, and I thought maybe I'd come out sooner. Like tomorrow."

"Oh," he says.

 _You're bored. That's why you want to come?_

"Is that okay?" she asks.

 _Who do I think I'm kidding?_

"Sure. Yes, let's do it this week. We'll make is special. Your favorite place. The Dorchester or the Savoy."

"I'd have to stay in a hotel?"

 _I can't kick Odette out on one day's notice. Can I? She'd probably be okay with that._

"Well…"

"She's in town?" Rory asks.

"Yes."

"For how long?"

 _Until I can figure out where to put her that won't end up with both of our fathers at the door with shot guns._

He hears Rory sigh. "She's moved in?"

 _Fuck._

"Yes."

"When?"

"A couple of weeks ago," he admits. _But it was kind of by accident._

"Okay. Were you going to tell me?" she asks angrily.

"Of course I was."

 _God, now I'm lying._

"So now you want me to just wait in a hotel until you can slip away and come see me?" she says, and he can hear the hurt in her voice.

"No."

"Like I'm a geisha?"

"Come on, that's not fair." He sets his laptop aside. _I have given you every opportunity to tell me that you want to be the woman in my life._

"I know I knew about Odette," she says, backtracking. "I just… Like a hotel. It's just weird."

"It doesn't have to be. Look, can't we just keep the plans the same? Come out in three weeks, and we will figure it all out then," Logan says.

 _I will have Odette out by then, and I am going to convince you that this is a real relationship, not this Vegas stuff._

She doesn't respond, so he resorts to begging. "Please?... Rory?"

"Yeah, a few weeks."

"I'm looking forward to it," he says.

"Yeah, me too." But he can tell that she's not.

After he hangs up, he pulls his laptop back open and tries in vain to finish proofing his contract. But he can't concentrate knowing that he's hurt her feelings. He minimizes his emails and brings up his schedule.

He calls her right back, but she doesn't answer, so he sends a text.

 **Please call me. I'm sorry.**

When she returns his call twenty minutes later, he has just booked a flight to New York.

"I'm sorry," he says as soon as he picks up. "That's not how I meant for that to go. I'm going to come to New York in two days. Will you come to see me? I'm going to explain everything. Please, Rory."

She doesn't answer, so he pushes his pride to the side and tries again. "Please, baby. I want to see you."

 _I need to see you._

She finally agrees. "Okay. I'll come."

* * *

Logan is frantically typing, trying to get some work done while he waits for Rory to arrive. When he finally hears her knock, he puts his computer away and rushes to the door.

She gives him a tight smile, and an awkwardness ensues.

 _No. This is the weekend we sort this all out._

"Come here." He takes her hand and pulls her tight to his chest. He breathes in the scent of her shampoo and sighs. "I'm so glad you came."

"Me too," she says, rising to her tiptoes to kiss him.

An hour later, they're curled up in bed. He is still covering her body in kisses, unable to stop.

"Why is sex always so good in a hotel?" Rory muses.

He laughs. "It's somewhere different. And… I mean, this place is covered in mirrors," he says, gesturing to the mirrored closet next to the bed. Noting her blush, he continues. "I saw you watching, Ace."

"Don't tease me. It was hot."

"Oh, I'm not teasing. How do you think I know you were looking?" he laughs.

"It's kind of amazing, ya know? How after all this time, all these years, that sex with you is still… just so…" she trails off, unable to find the word.

"Unbelievable," he fills in. "Amazing. Toe-curling. Mind-melting."

She giggles. "Yeah. All of that."

Logan's heart is pounding as he begins the speech he's practiced for the last few days. "It's because it's you and me, Ace. We have real history, and we both-"

Her cell phone interrupts him.

"Oh, God. It's Paris," she says. "Can I take this? She is losing it over this Doyle stuff, and I just need to-"

"It's fine, Ace."

 _I've got two days to say everything I need to say._

A few minutes later, she hangs up. "Can I leave you for an hour or so? She needs to be talked off the ledge."

"Well, I don't like it, but I can't have Paris's suicide on my conscience," he jokes. "Maybe I'll run over to Colin's and meet the new baby."

They quickly dress, and she steps into his arms before she leaves.

"Take a key," he tells her. "I'll meet you back here in a little bit."

"I can't wait," she says, causing Logan's face to light up.

On the walk uptown, he plans through the conversation he needs to have when he gets back. That he will end it with Odette. That he will commit to only her. She simply has to ask.

He knocks on Colin's door and is greeted by warm hugs.

"What are you doing here?" Stephanie asks.

"Quick work trip," he lies. "I thought I could come meet Anabelle."

"Oh, I just put her down. She'll be up again in about an hour."

"Okay, what if Colin and I take Harper out for a bit, you take a nap too, and then text us when she wakes up."

"How did you know I needed a nap?" she asks with a laugh.

"You have a newborn. Don't all parents of newborns need naps?" Logan responds.

Logan, Colin, and Harper stop into a Starbucks on their way to the Park. Logan hands Harper a cookie, grabs his coffee, and turns around to leave when he runs straight into Rory and Paris, who are waiting in line.

Rory's eyes widen, and a smirk threatens to break out on Logan's face. _She is so cute when she thinks she's been busted. Let's hear Rory 'High-Stakes Deception' Gilmore lie to her best friend._

"Rory, Paris. Good to see you," he starts.

"Hey guys," Rory croaks out.

"Huntzberger. Huntzberger's friend," Paris says.

Colin raises an eyebrow at her before giving Rory a warm hug. "And this is Harper," Colin says as her picks her up.

Rory smiles at the little girl, but Logan can still see the panic in her eyes.

He smiles broadly before letting her off the hook. "We're gonna head out, but it was good to see you."

Paris rolls her eyes, while Rory smiles at him gratefully. He subtly brushes his pinky against her wrist as they leave.

On the sidewalk, Colin turns to him, astonished. "What was that?"

"What?" Logan says, furrowing his brow.

"With your hand back there?"

 _Oh shit. I didn't think he was paying attention._

"I don't know what you're talking about," Logan says as he steps into the street, moving quickly away from Colin's question.

Colin catches back up with him on the opposite sidewalk. "Oh my God. You are fucking Rory Gilmore."

"What? No."

"Don't lie to me, Logan. I know you."

"Daddy, what's 'fucking'?" Harper asks.

" _Shit_. It's a bad word, sweetie. And Uncle Logan probably shouldn't be doing it."

"Daddy, what's 'shit'?"

"Go play. We're right behind you," Colin says, setting Harper down next to the playground.

"Excellent parenting there, buddy," Logan deflects.

Colin just stares at him.

"Spare me the lecture, okay? I've got it under control," Logan says.

Colin rolls his eyes, but lets it drop.

Later, when Harper is worn out and riding atop Logan's shoulders back to their apartment, he finally says "Don't tell, Steph."

Colin sighs. "You can't ask me to do that."

"Please?"

"Alright. Just make sure you know what you're doing."

Stephanie opens the door, holding the baby. Harper slides off of Logan's shoulders and runs to her mom.

"Mommy, Uncle Logan is a bad boy!" she says.

"Why? What did he do?" Stephanie asks.

"Daddy says he's fucking!"

* * *

When Logan gets back to his hotel room later, Rory is already back and ordering room service. "I ordered for you. Is that okay?" she asks.

"Of course. I can't believe we ran into you. There must be a thousand Starbucks in Manhattan. Did Paris notice?"

"No. She's so upset about her divorce, she didn't notice a thing. I'm sure Colin didn't either though. We played it pretty cool."

"Oh, no. He definitely noticed. And now Stephanie knows too."

"Oh, God. What did they say?"

 _Steph says she'll personally kick your ass if you throw me over again._

"Not much," Logan says, before regaling her with Harper's accusation.

They laugh for a moment before Rory turns serious. "How are you and Colin, two people who never take anything seriously, doing so well in life, when Paris and I, two people who have never had a flippant day in our lives, are such a mess?"

"Ace. You are not a mess."

"I don't know about that. I mean… I didn't get the Sandee Says job. And I blew my shot at Conde Nast. And I slept with a Wookie," she admits.

 _What? What? And what the hell?_

"I'm gonna need some background here, Ace."

She goes into detail, way too much detail, about the last few weeks of her life. Logan tries to stay calm, but his blood is roaring.

 _I was planning on figuring this all out tonight. And she's having one-night stands._

 _I've been coddling her and making excuses, but the truth is she has no idea who she is or what she wants._

"I'm gonna give you some tough love, Rory." He takes a deep breath before continuing. "You are a great writer. A _great_ writer. But if you want to be successful, you have to realize that it takes more than that. You need drive, and ambition, and perspective. And the last couple of months you haven't had any of that. You constantly tell me that you're bored, and instead of working on yourself to figure it out, you show up at my place, apparently for a string of one-night stands since that what you do now."

Her eyes blink furiously.

"Where is the Rory Gilmore who saved the Daily News? Who followed Obama around the country? Who wrote think pieces for all kinds of feminist causes?"

She swallows hard, taking in his judgement.

"You need to figure out what you care about. Because it's not lines or Sandee Says… Or me."

He rises from the bed, grabs a key card, and leaves the room. He heads outside and walks the city as dusk settles in around him. He is half proud of himself and half terrified that he has ruined anything he may still have with her.

Eventually he heads back, unsure if he will still find her there. She is under the covers watching TV, and he can see the tear stains on her cheeks.

"Ace, I'm sorry. I was way too harsh on you."

"No, you were right. I needed to hear that," she says opening the covers to invite him in. He toes off his shoes and undresses before slipping in.

 _So I'm pathetic. I don't care. I've always loved her more than she loves me._

"And… you know I care about _you,_ right? Logan, I will always…" she trails off as her voice hitches. "But your life is perfect. Your perfect job, perfect apartment, perfect fiancée. And in the immortal words of Miley Cyrus, I'm like a wrecking ball."

Despite the seriousness of the conversation, Logan laughs out loud. "I don't want to disparage the message of a poet laureate like Miley, but none of that is true. Nothing about my life is perfect, and you're not wrecking anything that matters. The only way that analogy works for me is if, like Miley, you're naked on that wrecking ball."

She laughs too, and the tensions ease a bit, but he abandons his plans to tell her how he feels. He's not sure he can recover if she doesn't reciprocate.

* * *

 **August 2016**

"I know this is terrible to even ask, but when you leave for home next week, do you think you can move some of your stuff around? So it looks like you don't live here?" Logan asks Odette.

"I'll work on it. Just don't let her go into my room. Or… maybe just let her go into my room, so she can see that this is only a temporary situation. As soon as I get back, I'm going to look for my own flat. I've been moping around here for weeks. Enough is enough," she says.

"I'll help you find a place, and then we'll sit our parents down, okay?"

She sighs.

"I know. I'm not looking forward to it either, but we've let this- Oh, hold on. It's Rory."

Logan takes his phone into his bedroom and answers. "Hey!"

"Hi. I'm glad I caught you. We haven't been able to connect lately," Rory says.

"I know. I've been really busy with work, but I'll be done with most of it by the time you get here," he says.

"That's actually what I need to talk to you about. I have bad news, but for a good reason."

"Don't tell me you're not coming," Logan says.

"I'm not coming," she says. "I'm sorry. I know you had something special planned."

Logan's heart sinks. This has been his biggest fear. That the distance growing between them will eventually be too long to span, no matter how hard he tries.

"Logan? Did you hear me?"

"I did," he responds, unable to keep the disappointment out of his voice.

"I'm so sorry. I'm disappointed too. But it's for good. I heard what you said to me, and I really took it to heart. I needed to find something that inspired me. Because what I've been doing, it's not working."

"So what are you thinking about?" he asks, trying to smother his emotions.

"I'm going to write a book. About Mom and me and the way she raised me in Stars Hollow."

He hears the excitement in her voice, and he realizes he's being a dick.

 _She needs this. I shouldn't be so selfish._

"Ace, that's a great idea. You've been prepping for a book with Naomi so you're ready process-wise, and no one can write that story but you. How did you come up with it?" he asks.

"Well, I was talking to Jess and telling him-"

"You were talking to _Jess_?" he interrupts.

"Lo-gan."

"No, I just didn't know you still talked to him," Logan says, attempting to come off casually.

"I don't. He was in town to visit Luke, and he stopped by the Gazette office."

Logan responds with stony silence.

"Do you want to talk about this or not?" she asks.

He gives an exasperated sigh. "I do. I'm sorry. Continue."

"No, _I'm_ sorry. I should've remembered how much he bothers you. Anyway, I was telling him how pathetic my life has been, and he nudged me toward this idea. And it all falls in line with what you said to me. I've got to take some ownership. So I hate that I can't come to see you, but I'm inspired. I need to write now."

"Well if you're happy, I'm happy," he says.

"I just don't want us… to run out of time. Have you set a date for the wedding?"

He is stunned for a moment at the cavalier way she speaks about his impending nuptials.

"Because I can't let… I mean, if I need to come this week, tell me, because…"

 _She does care. Just say it, Ace. Ask me if we can make this real._

But she doesn't finish her thought, so eventually he says "No, there's no date. Hopefully there won't be one."

"Okay, good. I was worried that… Never mind. So what was the surprise? I'm sorry I'm messing up your plans."

"No, I'm not going to tell you. We can still do it the next time you come," he says. After a pause, he asks "You are coming back, right?"

"Yes, Logan. Of course I'll be back."

"Good luck with your writing, Ace. And call me soon. I miss hearing your voice," Logan says.

"I will. I promise."

He heads back into the living room where Odette is scrolling through her phone. She looks up, sees his expression, and asks "Alright?"

"She's not coming, so don't worry about your room. And do you want Harry Potter and the Cursed Child tickets for next week? They were really hard to get."

"I don't know. I've never read Harry Potter. Do you think I'll be able to follow it?" she asks.

"You've never read Harry Potter?" Logan asks.

 _Geez. I thought I couldn't marry her before._

* * *

 **September 2016**

Logan exits a meeting to find three missed calls from Rory. There are no voicemails or texts, so, slightly unnerved, he sends her a quick text.

 **Everything ok?**

He slips his phone back in his pocket and pops into Bobbi's office to accompany her to their dinner.

"You ready for this?" he asks her.

"Yes, I just found out that Smith's daughter went to university with me. That should give me some wiggle room in the small talk department while you close him," she says.

"Excellent. We've been working on this too hard to lose him now."

He pulls his phone out to check for Rory's response and finds nothing.

They take a car to dinner, Logan anxiously checking his phone.

 _I haven't been able to talk to her in over a week. We've both been so busy and the fucking time zones…_

"Logan. What's up? You're mind seems a million miles away," Bobbi says.

"What?... I'm sorry. Putting it away," Logan says tucking his phone into his pocket.

But halfway through the meal, he feels his phone buzz, and he subtly eases it out of his pocket.

 _It's Rory._

"Excuse me, please," he says standing up and leaving the table quickly. He races out to the lobby and answers. "Rory?"

But she hangs up just as he answers. He quickly calls her right back, but she doesn't pick up.

 _Shit. I'm dying to talk to her, but I can't ruin this meeting just to do it._

He heads back into the dining area and slides back into his booth, ignoring the glare from Bobbi. Turning on his game face, he quickly begins maneuvering, and by dessert, all parties have agreed to terms.

Outside, he and Bobbi shake hands with their new investors and plan to meet with attorneys tomorrow to sign paperwork.

"You sure pulled that out of your arse," she says as they wait for their car. "I was worried about you at the beginning."

"I know," he says. "I'm sorry. I was a little distracted."

"Everything's alright though?" she asks.

He nods. "Everything's great," he lies, looking out the window, effectively shutting down the conversation.

As soon as the car pulls up to her flat, Logan pulls out his phone. Rory's number is dialing by the time Bobbi reaches her door.

It goes to voicemail.

Once back in his apartment, he tries again. Voicemail.

 _This is like that time after she found out about the bridesmaids. How many times can I call before it becomes stalking?_

In the end, he calls one more time, this time opting to leave a message.

"Hey. I really want to talk to you, so call me back. I don't care how late it is… I miss you, Rory."

* * *

The next morning, Logan oversleeps.

 _That's what I get for staying up to wait for a phone call._

 _This is not acceptable. I am too good at what I do to drop the ball right now._

He rushes through his shower and heads to the office to finalize the agreements made yesterday. He purposely drops his phone in a desk drawer and doesn't even peek until late afternoon, when all of his business is tied up.

There are four missed calls from Rory, two including voicemails, but when he goes to listen, he only hears dial tones.

 _What is going on?_

 _Is she hurt or upset?_

 _Is she breaking up with me?_

 _It's been too long since I've seen her, and now I don't know what's going on in her life…_

He returns her call only to get hit with her voicemail again.

 _Ugh. I cannot go another night playing phone tag._

Luckily for him, the phone rings again just as he walks in the door of his flat.

"Hello?"

He hears Rory yell before she hangs up.

 _What the…?_

"Hello?" he asks again.

He is about to call her back, when he receives another incoming call from her.

"Hello? Rory?

"Crap! I did it a-" She hangs up again.

 _What on Earth is happening here?_

The phone rings again and he hears "chewed up and spit out by this thing we call life."

"Rory! What is going on?"

She hangs up on him again, and it suddenly dawns on him what is happening here.

 _She's trying to break up with me, and she keeps losing her nerve._

He takes a couple of deep breaths, trying to settle on a strategy before he calls her back.

 _Do I beg?_

 _Do I tell her I'm coming to her right now?_

 _Do I just accept that this is what is supposed to be? That she will never love me as much as I love her? That I will never come first in her life?_

 _And can I be okay with that? Or do I have to let her go?_

All of these emotions swirl in his brain until he can't make a coherent thought.

 _I'm just going to have to wing it._

"Hey, stop calling!" A strange voice answers Rory's phone.

"What are you talking about? She's calling me!" he yells at the stranger.

"Yeah, well. It's a reflex, and we're gonna kick it. We've got Lipitor, so you won't hear from her ever again."

Racking his brain, he realizes who he's speaking with.

"Lane, just put her on the phone!"

"Nope, not gonna happen," Lane says. "No, I'm protecting you for some reason."

 _What? Is she talking to Rory? Does she think Rory needs protection from me?_

 _What has Rory told her is happening with us?_

"Hey," Rory says.

"What is going on?" he asks, unable to keep the anxiety out of his voice.

"Nothing. Bad day."

His innate desire to help her swoops in, but he fights it off with sarcasm.

"Yeah, I heard about the cholesterol problem."

"Ha, ha," Rory says.

"Come on, Ace. You called me a bunch of times today. You called me four times last night. You hung up every time. What is it?"

 _Just rip off the band-aid._

"Nothing. I had a thing with my mom."

 _Oh. She's not breaking up with me. Thank God._

"Well, talk to me. I'm here," he says.

Rory sighs loudly. "I was just upset at her, and I was needing to vent, and I realized I… I can't call you anymore."

"Why?" he asks incredulously.

"Logan?" he hears Odette call from downstairs.

"I gotta take this outside," he mutters to himself before turning and heading out to the balcony.

"Because she's there," Rory says, and he can hear the tears in her voice.

 _Oh, shit. This is about me._

 _Okay. Stay calm._

"Rory-" he begins.

"She's there," she accuses.

"Yeah." He doesn't know what else to say.

"That's why," she sighs.

Logan exhales loudly.

"So I guess we should say goodbye."

"If that's what you want." _I can call you later when she's not home._

"Don't make this my thing," she says, indignation rising.

"Sorry," he says quietly.

"So that's it?" she asks. "We're breaking up?"

 _Oh God. She means goodbye for good. Not goodbye to this phone call. Fuck. What can I say?_

"Except, we can't break up," she continues. "Because we're nothing."

He is stunned; her words feel like a slap to the face. She hangs up before he can say anything, and he chokes back his response.

 _How can she say that? Even when I've felt insecure about us, I've never thought that she actually felt we were nothing. How can she not know that she is everything to me?_

Her words replay over and over in his mind.

 _She can't mean that. She was crying. You don't cry over_ _ **nothing.**_

He walks inside and slides down to the couch, pulling off his tie.

"Logan?"

 _Maybe I should just go to her right now. Convince her that we are not nothing. Convince her that_ _ **Odette**_ _and I are nothing,_

 _Or maybe she was looking for a way out…_

"Logan?"

 _But I can't let her do that. Because when we're together, it's magic. She can't deny that. It's only when we go too long without seeing each other that-_

"Logan?" Odette says as she pops up at the top of the stairs.

"What?" he yells at her.

She visibly shrinks back before saying "The sink in the kitchen is leaking, and I don't know how to fix it."

He stares blankly at her.

"Are you mad at me?" she asks.

 _I have to get away from her. This is not actually her fault, and she doesn't deserve my wrath._

He heads to his bedroom, but finds no privacy there.

 _Why can't I have a fucking bedroom door like normal people do?_

 _Christ, I am losing it._

He slides past her on the stairs and heads out the door, aimlessly walking, unsure of where he is going, unsure of what he has been doing with the last eleven years of his life.

* * *

 **October 2016**

"Hey buddy," Logan says, answering his cell phone as he strides down the hall. "Can I call you back in a little bit? I'm heading into a meeting."

 _And I_ _ **really**_ _don't want to talk to you._

"I talked to Rory," Finn replies.

At the door to the conference room, Logan makes an abrupt u-turn and heads back to his office.

"Really. How's she doing?" he asks, trying his best to sound nonchalant.

"Fine. I suppose. She was very surprised that I didn't know you two had broken up."

Logan sits back down in his chair silently.

"She assumed that the whole thing meant nothing to you. That it wasn't important enough to let your best friend know," Finn continues.

Logan inhales deeply.

"I told her you were probably just too devastated to tell us."

 _Oh God._

"Please tell me you didn't actually say that," Logan says.

"No. But that's closer to the truth, isn't it?"

Logan is again silent.

"Mate, you've got to fix this."

"She made her decision," Logan says. " _She_ thinks we were… nothing."

 _She said that we were_ _ **nothing**_ _._

Finn scoffs. "I think we've been through this before. You told me the same thing last time, and you let her walk away. Are you really going to do that again?"

"I don't-"

"Do you want her?"

"Yes, but-"

"Then fight for her, Logan."

"I don't know what else to do to convince her," Logan says.

"Lucky for you, I've got an idea. Come home, and we'll make it happen."

 _He's right. I've been devastated for weeks, and I can't go down like this. Not without a fight._

"Alright. I'm coming."

At the end of the meeting, Logan calls all of the department heads into his office.

"I need to go out of town this weekend," he says.

"But we have-" David starts.

"I know. And I'll be back and ready to go on Monday. I'll be accessible by email if you need me. I'm sorry this is so last minute, but we've worked hard, and we're ready."

As they file out of his office, Bobbi stops in at his desk.

"Is everything alright?" she asks.

"No. But I'm going to fix it, and I'll be fine by Monday. Don't worry."

Logan flies directly into Hartford, planning his words and actions on the flight. He rents a car and heads to his parents' house.

"Sir, your mother is at a spa in Arizona. I don't think she knew you were coming," says a maid that Logan doesn't recognize.

"That's fine. I'm not here to see her. I do have some friends arriving soon. Can you show them to the living room? Thanks." Logan says.

Within an hour, Colin, Finn, and Robert arrive.

"Robert?" he asks Finn.

"No one else was available on such short notice, and my plan requires three of us."

"Fine, but he better not hit on her," Logan says.

Finn pours the scotch, and they settle in. They spend the next hour or so strategizing and planning.

"I've hacked her computer," Robert says. "It was surprisingly hard. That computer must be fifteen years old. The geezers she works with are on board too."

"I spoke to the weird guy. Chris or Greg… or something common. The decorations, the signs… All taken care of," Colin says.

"My man, Kirk! He is anything but common, dear Colin," Finn says. "I've got costumes here. And obviously, I will be doing the makeup."

Logan rolls his eyes, before saying "No make up for me. I'm handsome enough, as is. But you three should work on that… I've run this all by Taylor. He promises me the town will be empty."

He gets excited in spite of his nerves. While they are getting into costume, Logan slips into the kitchen to grab the key to the house in Maine.

 _This will be perfect. She can write her book uninterrupted._

 _Unless she wants me to move in there with her, in which case I will probably interrupt her frequently._

 _I need to slow my roll. I can't be this cocky._

He meets the guys in the foyer. "Are we ready, fellas?" he asks.

"Let's go get our girl," Finn says.

* * *

From an alleyway, he watches Rory go past him, smiling when she is distracted by the unicyclist and the crow. She heads into the newspaper office, and Logan puts on his top hat. "Showtime."

The guys move toward her, and suddenly Rory walks out to them, a big smile on her face.

Logan pauses to smile too. _This is the reception we were hoping for._

They circle around her, no one missing a beat.

It's perfect.

He settles into the planter behind her to wait for his cue.

"And we decided… That we had to come and take you out," Logan declares, striding toward her. She accepts her costume quickly with a smile on her face.

They run through the town, and as he reaches for her, she takes his hand without hesitation.

Everything comes together. The rooftop golfing, the trip to Doose's, the viewing of Kirk's movie. When they pile into the car, she gladly takes the seat beside him, snuggling in on the curvy road.

 _It's like nothing has changed. Things are perfect when we're together, and she's remembering that right now._

When they arrive at the underground speakeasy, Rory can't contain the glee on her face. He tugs her onto the dance floor and pulls her body close to his. It's all he can do to keep from kissing her right there.

But he slows it down, wanting to respect her space. They end up at a table for two watching his friends drink and flirt.

"Do you think Robert will hook up with that waitress?" she asks.

"Probably, but I'm not worried about him. He's single. I need to keep my eyes on Finn. I promised Andy."

"Not worried about Colin?" she asks.

"No. He would never. He still talks tough, but Steph and the girls are his life," Logan says.

 _I want you to be my life. Just give me a sign, Ace._

"How's your foot?" she asks, changing the subject.

Logan sighs. "I do not think it's broken."

"Well good."

"You're still a terrible dancer," he teases.

"Agreed."

"But damn, you are a beauty."

 _I've got to get this conversation on us._

"Save the sweet talk, Huntzberger," she admonishes.

"Well, you are."

"I'm not going Dutch, so…" she shoots back, sipping her champagne.

He laughs out loud. "Rats."

 _But I have to know. I can't bullshit all night._

"Glad I came?" he asks seriously.

"Why did you come?" she asks.

"Well, it was my turn to walk Finn," he jokes.

"Sure."

"And I did not like the way we left things," he says, alluding to his real reasons.

Rory shifts uncomfortably in her chair. "Yeah. Me neither."

"I should have told you about Odette moving in _." I should have told you that she lives in the guest room, and I barely see her._

"Nope, that was not the agreement," she says.

 _Well fuck 'Vegas'._

"I know."

"You owed me nothing," she says.

 _And fuck the word 'nothing'._

"Technically no, but-"

"No strings," she continues. "When we're together, we're together. When we're not, we're not."

 _That's not working for me. I'm miserable._

"So how are you?" Logan asks. _Please be miserable too._

"Oh, well, I'm okay _." She's not okay._

"Did you fix things with Lorelei?" he presses her.

"Not yet. I've been crashing at Lane's."

 _At least she's not at Paul's or Pete's or whoever._

 _But Lane is obviously not my biggest fan…_

 _Concentrate. Get back on track._

"No word from her at all?" he asks.

"Nope… What time is it?"

"Why? You bored?" he says with laugh.

"One thing I can honestly say, I've never been bored with you," she says smiling, causing Logan's heart to soar.

"Yeah, we're good like that," he agrees.

Her face falters for a moment, and Logan decides to move to the next part of his plan.

"I have something for you," he says, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a key.

"What is that?" she asks.

"That is a key," he snarks.

"To?"

"To… my family's house in Maine. It's a great place. Private. Right on the water. It's completely empty. No one ever uses it. My dad only bought it because Martha Stewart wanted it. They had a business thing fall through, and he was pissed." He realizes he is rambling and takes a breath.

"Wow, you're family life's different," she says.

 _Unimportant._

"It's yours," he says, pushing the key her way.

"Um… you're giving me a house?" she asks.

 _It's not like that…_

"It's yours to use… To write that book."

"What?"

"Go there. Stay as long as you want. Just work."

"Logan."

"There's a groundskeeper. He'll look after you. The cleaning lady comes twice a week. She'll cook for you. She'll shop for you." _And I'll be there too if you want._

"I can't," she says.

"Yes, you can. You need to do this. Write this book. It's time… Please. Take the key," he pushes.

She finally acquiesces before looking down and biting her lip. "Are you really gonna marry Odette?" she asks in a measured tone.

He blinks a few times. This is what he has been waiting all night for. What he has been waiting all year for.

"That's the dynastic plan," he says, monotone. He takes a breath to continue, but Rory turns her attention back to the tango dancers.

 _But I won't if you ask me not to. I will marry you if you let me._

He waits for her to turn back to him so he can finish his thought, but Colin jumps on the table in front of him, and the moment is gone.

They finish their champagne in silence until Rory stands and asks "Whaddya got for me next?"

He can't help but laugh at her enthusiasm. He takes her by the hand, rounds up the guys, and they head back to the car. He wraps his arm around her shoulder, pleased when she tucks in.

Within minutes, they are at the bed and breakfast that Robert had booked. They explore the front room, and Rory can't keep her hands off of him; Logan can't keep the smile off of his face.

The boys clear out, and Logan reaches into his pocket for a second key, although he's hoping she won't take this one.

"So… here."

"Wow. More keys," she says.

"I didn't know where we stood," he says honestly, "so I got you your own room."

"Oh, well, where's your room?"

"Right across from yours."

She grabs him by the lapels and gently kisses his lips. "Show me," she whispers.

 _This is going even better than planned._

She follows him closely up the stairs, his heart pounding in anticipation.

"It's beautiful," she says, taking in the room.

"You're beautiful," he tells her sincerely.

She smiles shyly before leaning in to kiss him.

They take their time undressing. ("Lots of pieces to this costume, Huntzberger.") There is no rush, no sense of urgency. It has been three months, and Logan wants to savor every moment.

She is riding him slowly, and he can't stop watching. He loves to see her like this- totally in control, chasing her own pleasure. His hands move on her hips as she clenches and unclenches around him.

He sits up, and Rory wraps her legs around him until they are totally intertwined.

Her body is tensing, and her eyes are welling up. Through the tears, Logan finally sees what he has been waiting to see for a year.

 _I know this look. She loves me._

As they ride out their orgasm, he is overcome with emotion.

"I love you, Rory," he whispers in her ear.

She pulls back to search his eyes before kissing him passionately.

 _It's there. I see it. I_ _ **feel**_ _it, even if she can't say it._

But as he heads to the bathroom to clean up, his thoughts are exploding.

 _This is torture, and it's only been two minutes. How in the world did she wait months for me to reciprocate?_

He is so distracted that he doesn't notice that the condom he flushes down the toilet is broken.

He heads back to the bed, stopping only to pull on his boxer briefs, before slipping in beside her.

"Logan… I just want to say-"

"Shh. You don't have to say anything," he says, letting her off the hook.

 _She'll tell me when she's ready. She waited for me. I can wait for her._

 _Besides… I know she loves me. You don't orgasm to tears over someone you just have lukewarm feelings for._

He snuggles her close, inhaling her scent. He wants to stay awake to remember it all, but the late hour, the copious amounts of alcohol consumed, and the warmth of her body combine to lull him to sleep.

* * *

He wakes up to an empty bed, before seeing Rory across the room, gazing out of the window.

"Hey. How long have you been sitting there?" he asks her.

"Just watching the sun come up," she says.

"Come back to bed," he says.

"How long before you have to get back?"

"Oh, I have time," he answers.

"How long?" she presses.

"Long enough."

 _It only takes a moment for us to realize what we have here._

Not satisfied with that response, she turns to stare him down.

Logan relents. "I have a flight out at noon... Don't do the math."

"Someone needs to," she says, and he can hear the tears in her voice.

 _Wait. What is going on here?_

 _Just push through it._

He climbs out of bed and grabs a shirt. "Okay, so there's this great diner down the road. Checked it out. It's not your beloved Luke's, but it's supposed to have an amazing breakfast."

"It's really pretty here," she says, turning back out the window.

"Well, I wanted it to be special."

"It was. It was a perfect night."

 _I do not like that tone._

"Hey Ace? Something going on in that head of yours?" he asks, approaching her.

She turns to him, rising, and hands his key back to him. "Here."

"No. No, I told you. It's yours. Use it to write."

 _That key is for you. For us._

"I don't need it. I know where I'm going to write."

He reluctantly takes it back. "Okay." He steps back toward. He is dying to touch her. To feel her. To remind her of what they shared last night.

"Breakfast sounds good," she says, verging on tears.

"Hey-"

"Come on," she sniffles. "We have to get you home."

She pushes past him, and Logan feels his façade crumble.

 _This is it. She is one hundred percent done with this._

But as they silently get dressed, he sneaks glances at her. She looks miserable, and while it shouldn't please him so much, his resolve is strengthened.

 _At breakfast, I'm just going to flat-out beg her not to give up. I've been so stubborn. Wanting her to make the first move. But it can be me. I love her, and she loves me, and if we let this pass because I'm being obstinate… I'll never forgive myself._

Downstairs, he takes Finn up on the martini offer. He needs all the courage he can get, even if it comes in liquid form.

He listens to the banter half-heartedly, trying to pull his life up from the galleys. He chimes in when necessary, but can't find the enthusiasm he felt last night. The fear of reality is creeping in with the sunlight.

"Well boys. My car is almost here," Rory announces.

"What?" Logan says. _What about breakfast? Begging?_

Finn makes the protests he wishes he could make.

"Logan tell her!" Finn says.

"I don't think she's listening to me anymore, boys."

 _It's really over._

Rory and the Life and Death Brigade play out an overdramatic goodbye complete with Wizard of Oz references that he would enjoy if he weren't feeling so nauseated.

The guys finally shuffle out, leaving the couple alone. She turns to him with sadness in her eyes.

 _Suck it up. Have some pride. Don't make her feel guilty for not being in love with you._

"You sure you don't want breakfast?" he asks, trying one last time.

"I'm sure."

"I'd really like to drive you back," he says. _What if this is the last time I see you?_

"I know."

"I dragged you out here," he continues, with a fake laugh.

"You didn't drag me," she says. "You took me on my own Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. How many girls can say that?"

"It didn't work though, did it?"

"Every ride has to end," she says.

 _Do not blame her. She doesn't want what you want, and that is her right._

"Okay," he says, finally giving in to the inevitable. But he can't resist touching her one last time. He reaches out for her. "So... Let's do this."

He places a tender kiss on her lips, tasting the salt.

"If you change your mind about the house, it's yours," he says.

 _I will always be waiting for you to change your mind. I'm going down with this ship._

"No strings attached," he promises.

"I think your days of rescuing me are over."

"Oh, you never really needed rescuing, Ace. You know that."

 _I love you just the way you are._

"I do now."

He knows he can't hold it together much longer so he steps away, reluctantly letting her go. He places the hat above her melancholy smile, brushes her hair away from her eyes, and steps away.

He takes a mental picture, smiling his best fake smile. "Yeah, just like that."

He quickly turns and hightails it out to the car where his friends are waiting.

"So that's it?" Robert asks.

"That's it," Logan replies.

 _Don't make me talk about it._

"How can that be it? Anyone who sees you two together knows it's kismet," Finn says.

"If it were kismet, she would be out here with you," Colin says. "It's not what you want to hear, but I'm being honest. You threw it down last night, and if she's not on board after that, you should let her go."

"No, go back in there, Logan," Finn says.

"I think Colin's right, guys. Rory and I are just not meant to be," he says, desperately trying to convince himself.

* * *

 **November 2016**

Logan wakes up the morning after the U.S. elections to the shocking news that Trump has won the presidency.

He is sipping coffee, constantly refreshing CNN when Odette walks into the kitchen.

"Have you seen this?" he asks.

"Wow. Well, we thought Brexit wouldn't happen either," she says.

"Rory must be devastated," he says before silently cursing himself.

 _When is she going to stop being my first thought?_

"Really?"

"Yeah. She's always been a huge fan of Hilary Clinton, back before I even knew her," he explains.

"Maybe you should call her?" Odette says.

He doesn't admit that the thought has already crossed his mind.

"No, I just need to keep this a clean break."

 _I've got to get on with my life. She said no. She had reasons._

 _Well this time, she didn't actually say no. But she said goodbye, and I'm sure she had reasons._

The light catches her engagement ring, distracting him from his thoughts of Rory and introducing strange thoughts of Odette.

"You know, I always thought our biggest issue would be that we couldn't live together, but you've been here for months, and it's been fine," Logan says.

"I bet you'll be glad when I'm out next month though, huh?" she asks, sitting down beside him with a cup of coffee.

"I don't know. I'm kinda used to having you around."

She looks at him sharply. "Where are you going with this?"

 _I'm not actually sure._

"What if we get married? For real?"

"Why would we do that?" she asks.

"Because we like each other. Because we _can_ cohabitate. Because we're not getting any younger."

"Hey! I'm younger than you. And… Okay, technically we live together. But more like roommates. We hardly ever see each other. I'm moving out in three weeks," she says.

"Don't. Let's see what happens. We used to have genuine feelings. Maybe we can get them back."

 _What am I even saying? How desperate I've become to leave Rory in the past…_

Odette is looking at him closely. He leans forward to kiss her, for the first time in eighteen months. It is stilted and awkward.

When he pulls away from her, she has wrinkled her nose in distaste.

"So we'll have to work at it. Maybe brush our teeth," he says with a smile.

"I don't know."

"We should think about it," he says as he heads up the stairs to get ready for work.

* * *

 **December 2016**

Logan looks at his ringing cell phone to see an unknown Hartford area code.

 _Geez, Mom. That didn't take long. I should never have told her that we were thinking about spring. I just wanted her to shut up._

He declines the call and dives back into the proposal he's reading.

A few hours later, the same Hartford number calls again.

 _You have got to be kidding me. I am not going to talk to wedding planners._

He rejects the call and immediately calls his mother. He is in a full tirade when Shira finally interrupts him.

"Logan! Stop yelling at me! I have no Earthly idea what you are talking about. I haven't given anyone your number," she says.

"Then who is this Hartford number that has started calling me the day after I told you we may get married in the spring?" he asks.

"I don't know, dear. But the wedding will be in London, so all of the planners and vendors will be there."

"Oh. That… makes sense."

"Although Odette really is dragging her feet," Shira says. "To my knowledge she hasn't done anything yet. This will be the longest engagement in history. I wish she would let me-"

"Gotta go, Mom. Bye," Logan says, hanging up on her.

 _Who is calling me?_

His thoughts flit to Rory.

 _It's not her. She said no. She had reasons._

He returns to his business and finishes his day uneventfully. When he gets home, he finds Odette at the kitchen table with her phone to her ear.

She glares at him as he walks in. "Yes, Shira, I understand how quickly the best people book up…"

Logan mouths "Sorry" to which Odette rolls her eyes.

"Shira. Shira. Logan just walked in the door. Can I call you later?... Okay… Yes, I'll tell him. Au revoir."

Logan pours her a glass of wine and grabs a beer for himself.

"Thanks for that," she says sarcastically. "What did you say to her? She thinks we're getting married this spring."

"I know. It was stupid. I just needed to get her off my back. I'll tell her to lay off," he says.

Odette sighs. "Are we really going to do this? I mean, we're not even…"

 _I know. The intimacy… the relationship… none of it is coming back like we thought it would._

"We don't have to. I know it's not what either of us want. And I can handle our fathers," he says.

"It should be what I want. You're fun and handsome, and I like you. But we're not in love with each other," she says.

"And we probably won't be," Logan agrees.

"Ugh. I wish I were. I don't want to be in love with a bipolar drug addict."

"And I don't want to in love with someone who has no clue what she wants and keeps breaking my heart."

"We're a mess," she laughs.

"It would be the safe choice," he argues.

 _Safe is never a word I've wanted to apply to my life. But if the last year has taught me anything, it's that I don't want any more back and forth. I want stability._

They are eating take-out at the coffee table later that night when the mysterious Hartford number calls again.

"This is the third time this number has called today," he says. "Let me take this…. Hello?"

"Logan?"

It is a voice he knows, but cannot place.

"Yes… This is Logan."

"It's Christopher… Hayden."

 _Oh._

"Rory's dad."

"I know who you are, Chris. Is everything okay?" Logan asks.

"Well…"

 _Oh my God._

"What happened to Rory?" Logan asks.

Odette's head snaps back from the television to look at him.

Logan stands up. "Christopher. What is going on?"

"She's not hurt. She's physically fine. I'm sorry I scared you. But… I just think she could use your help," Christopher says.

Logan puts his hand up to let Odette know that Rory is fine, and then he moves into the bedroom to finish the conversation privately.

"What's going on?" he repeats.

"She just… needs you right now. That's all I really feel comfortable saying," Christopher hedges.

Logan is silent.

 _What could be going on?_

 _It doesn't matter… It's not my concern anymore._

"Chris, it's really not my place. She…"

 _She said no. She had reasons._

"You were the one who told me to move on with my life," Logan continues. "Obviously, I haven't done a great job with that, but I'm trying. Rory has made her decisions, and I have to respect that."

Now it is Christopher's turn to be silent.

He finally speaks. "I was wrong when I told you that. You're not me. And it's becoming increasing apparent that Rory is not Lorelei. She's going through something right now that only you can help her with."

"But you can't tell me what it is?"

"No," Christopher says. "She doesn't know I'm calling you, so I don't want to overstep any more than I already have. But I'm begging you, Logan. Go to her. For both of your sakes."

The urgency in Christopher's tone gives Logan pause.

"I'll think about," he sighs. "Where is she?"

"She's at Richard and Emily's. Er… Emily's. In Hartford. Please, Logan."

He hangs up and heads back to the couch to find Odette looking up at him, eyes widened.

"It's nothing. Not my problem. Don't worry about it," he reassures her.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

Except he's not. His conversation with Christopher stays with him the rest of the evening. It keeps him up tossing and turning all night.

At three in the morning, Odette pokes him. "Can you tell me what's going on?" she asks, sitting up and turning on her lamp.

"I don't actually know," he says before relaying the entire conversation with Christopher.

"You're not going to be able to let this go," she tells him. "You should go and see what's going on. If she doesn't really need you, tell her that this has to stop. And if she does… well, you'll figure it out from there."

Logan looks at her gratefully. "Why can't it be you?"

"Because it's not. It's her."

* * *

Thirty hours later, a weary Logan stands at Emily Gilmore's front door, his hand poised to knock.

 _What am I doing here?_

He has asked himself the same question over and over since he boarded the plane in London, but he has not been able to come up with an exact answer. His imagination has gone crazy, thinking of all the things that could be wrong with her.

 _Christopher said she was physically fine, so I can rule out illness, but what else could be so dire?_

He raps lightly at the door, unsure of who will answer or even be awake at this early hour.

Rory opens the door in pajama bottoms and a Yale sweatshirt.

 _Is that mine? Is she sleeping in my clothes?_

"Logan! What… What are you doing here?" she asks, quickly smoothing her hair behind her ears.

He looks at her, really looks at her, but can see nothing that alarms him.

 _Except for how hard my heart is pounding. How does she always do this to me?_

"Your dad called and said you needed my help," he finally responds.

"I'm sorry, Logan. He shouldn't have done that. I'm… I'm fine, really," she says.

He can tell by her voice and her avoidance of eye contact that she's not.

"Can I come in?"

"Um… sure," she says, opening the door further and allowing him in.

"It's changed a bit since I was last here," Logan says, taking in the sparsely furnished room.

"Grandma lives in Nantucket now, and I don't need a lot. I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting company."

They move into the living room and sit down on opposite couches. He stares hard, but she will not return his gaze, and the silence stretches into awkwardness.

"Why am I here, Ace?" he asks, her nickname slipping out of habit.

She still doesn't say anything.

 _What in the actual fuck? Is she kidding me?_

"God damn it, Rory! I just flew across the Atlantic to see you, and you can't even talk to me?"

Her hands reach up to cover her face, and he can tell she has started crying.

He takes a deep breath to calm himself, trying to be patient. _Something is obviously wrong with her, and yelling is not going to help._

She finally looks up at him, tears on her cheeks, and asks "Why _are_ you here Logan?"

 _Good question. She already knows I love her. Should I just lay it all out here again?_

"Because I'm in love with you, Rory. I have been since I was twenty-two, and it's not going away, no matter how hard I try. You know it. I know it. That's why I'm here. You say jump, and I hop off a scaffold. Your dad says you need me, and I'm on the next plane out of London." He looks away for a moment before meeting her gaze with a steely resolve. "Don't you love me?"

Her face softens. "Of course I do. You know that."

"How am I supposed to know that?" he asks angrily.

For a moment his heart flutters. _(She loves me)_ But in an instant he knows that is not what he came here to hear.

"It's not enough, though. I need more than that. I need you to be with me. Really be with me. Not this Vegas bullshit you want."

"Hey! Don't turn this all on me," she says, her voice rising. "You're engaged to someone else, and if it were only about your parents, you wouldn't do it. You've defied them for me before, but you don't seem in any hurry to do that now."

Logan inhales deeply, trying to reign in his anger. "You know what? You're right. I haven't gotten out of this engagement. The truth is… the truth is… I see Honor and Josh with their kids, and I'm so envious. They have a family apart from Mom and Dad. I want that. I want to get married and have kids. I want a family. I want that with _you_. I've always wanted that with you…

But I guess, deep down, I don't trust you to give it to me. You've burned me before, and I guess I always knew that I'd end up here again, begging for you to give me more than you're willing to."

 _And that is the uncomfortable truth that I have been avoiding admitting to myself since the day I saw her in Hamburg._

Rory's breath catches as she is openly crying now. "It's so much more complicated than that."

"It's really not," he says. "I love you, and you say you love me."

Rory's silence speaks volumes to him.

"You're sure you're okay?" he asks.

Rory still doesn't say anything, just continues to sob into her hands.

"Goodbye, Rory." He sighs, standing and striding out the front door.

 _How many goodbyes do I need?_

"Logan!" he hears her cry as the door shuts behind him.

 _Don't turn around. There's nothing left for me to say._

He starts the rental car and heads back to the airport. He drops his car off, buys a return ticket to London, and heads through security.

 _What a waste of a day. What a waste of my life._

 _I mean, she loves me, but she doesn't want to try? At all?_

Waiting to board, he pulls out his phone to charge it, stunned at what he finds.

 **Please come back. Please don't leave. There are so many things I need to say.**

He reads the text over and over.

 _What else could she possibly need to say? And why couldn't she say it when I was there? I'm not going back._

 _Why do I do this to myself? I shouldn't even entertain this idea. I obviously have no more self-respect._

 _If I go back, will she just destroy what's left of me?_

 _But if I do go back, this time, I won't leave until she gives me some answers._

 _Maybe I can get some closure, if nothing else._

 _Damn it._

He grabs his bag and heads out of the airport to rent another car.

Two hours later, he is knocking on her door again. She answers looking even more disheveled than he left her.

"You didn't get on the plane," she says.

"I didn't get on the plane," he says, striding purposefully into the house. "I'm not going to until you give me some answers."

"That's fair," she says, following him in and sitting on the same couch as him this time. "Do you want something to drink, or…"

"No," he says curtly. "Why did you say no when I asked you to marry me?"

"Wow. Just jumping right in. Okay… I wanted to say yes. Logan, I loved you so much, and the thought of life without you was devastating. But we were so young, and I felt, very strongly, that I needed to find myself. Find my voice as a writer. As an adult. I was worried that I would always be thought of… and seen… as your wife, and not my own independent person. I probably let my mom influence me more than I should have.

Some days I think I made the right choice, but most days I regret it."

 _That is… not what I expected her to say. But she knows that I never wanted her to be a Stepford._

"So why-"

"Wait. I need answers too. It's my turn," she interrupts him.

Logan nods at her. _I guess that's fair._

"Why did you propose like that? In front of everybody. You know how I like to process and talk things out. You really put me on the spot."

He is surprised by this. He'd never thought about that from her side before.

"You always liked when I made big romantic gestures, and it seemed like the right time. One phase of our lives was ending, and I wanted to start the next one together. My turn… Why did you walk away from me at the Obama rally?"

"What?"

"The rally in San Francisco. Right before California primaries. You saw me. I wanted to talk to you so badly, and you just… walked away," he says.

"You were actually there?"

"Ace, you looked right at me, shook your head, and walked away. It gutted me."

"Oh my God," she whispers. "I can't believe you were really there. I'd had all these fantasies of you showing up on the campaign trail to tell me you'd changed your mind, and… I was so sleep-deprived. I thought that I hallucinated you."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I thought I was losing my mind. But if you were really there… If you really wanted to talk to me, why did you never try and get in touch?" she asks.

"I guess I was being stubborn," he admits. "I felt like… since you had rejected me, you had to decide if you wanted to talk to me again. But if you were fantasizing that I would come to see you, then why didn't _you_ try and get in touch?"

"The same… I felt like you walked away, so you had to make the first move. And I had Finn show me your Facebook page one time, and there were so many pictures of you with all these beautiful women, and I just felt sick to my stomach. I was sure you had moved on. That I was never even a thought in your head. How many women _did_ you date in the years we were apart?"

"A lot. It was miserable. Who the fuck is Paul?" he asks.

"Paul? Oh. Paul. He's not important. He never was. What is your relationship with Odette? Really."

"She's… We've been friendly for years, and our families… It's complicated, and it would take me a while to explain it. But I haven't slept with her since I saw you in Hamburg. I only want you, Rory," he admits.

She is stunned into silence, so he continues. "Last question. Why did your dad tell me to come here?"

Rory pauses and looks away, the rapid-fire question and answer session apparently over.

"Logan…"

"Come on, Ace. Just tell me what's going on," he pleads.

"Okay. Okay." She looks down into her lap, gathering her thoughts. When she looks back up, her face is composed. "I'm pregnant."

He looks into her eyes, and she looks back, unflinching, unwavering.

 _Pregnant. She wouldn't be telling me this if I wasn't the father._

"New Hampshire?" he asks.

She nods with a tight smile. "Our beautiful, romantic, perfect last night made a baby."

 _We made a baby. We made a baby._

 _Oh my God, we made a baby._

In all of his thoughts over the last two days, this has somehow never occurred to him.

He is quiet for a moment before Rory says "I know this is huge, unexpected news, and I don't expect anything from you, Logan. Really. I know you have-"

"How far along would that make you?" he asks.

"Nine weeks. Apparently, when you're pregnant, months are obsolete. It's all about weeks," she rambles. "I had an ultrasound two days ago. Do you want to see the picture?"

He nods, and she brings him a little square photo with an amorphous blob on it.

 _We made a baby._

His mind is whirring, trying to do the math.

"How long have you known?" he asks.

She looks back down into her lap and quietly responds. "Three weeks."

 _Three weeks? She's kept this from me for three weeks? What if Christopher hadn't called me?_

"Were you ever going to tell me?" he asks, trying to keep the hurt out of his voice.

"I was going to tell you if I decided to keep it," she says.

 _Oh._

 _Oh._

 _She's not going to keep it. She's not going to keep my baby. The baby that I didn't know I had until three minutes ago._

He sits back against the couch and runs his hands through his hair. After a couple of measured breaths, he speaks. "I'm going to support whatever decision you make, but I would like to at least be a part of the process. Where's your pro-con list?"

"How do you know I made a pro-con list?"

He gives her a disbelieving look, to which she rolls her eyes. "I'll go get it."

She heads to Richard's study and returns a moment later with a well-worn piece of paper.

"Let me hear it," he says, and she settles back unto the couch.

"Okay. Cons. Number one. This will blow up Logan's life-"

"Ace, it will not blow up anything," he interrupts.

"Logan, if you chime in on each one, we'll never finish. Just let me get through it," Rory says.

He nods in agreement.

"Number one. This will blow up Logan's life, and I've done enough damage there. Number two. I'm alone, and being a single parent is hard."

"Rory, you're not-"

She looks up at him sternly, and he shuts his mouth.

"Number three. My career is a disaster, and I have no secure income. Number four. I'm essentially homeless. Number five. I'm terrified of being pregnant, terrified of delivery, and infants scare the crap out of me. Number six. I can't cook, change a diaper, or really do anything maternal. Number seven. This baby will be a daily reminder of how badly I screwed up with Logan, and my self-esteem is already in the toilet.

Now I know you have a response for each of those, but… just let me keep going.

Pros." She pauses, making him wonder if she has any. But then she continues. "Number one. This baby will be half Logan, and if I love it half as much as I love him, my heart will overflow… And that's it," she says, her voice cracking.

She looks up at him, her eyes shining with tears, and he knows he's about to cry too.

 _She loves me as much as I love her. Finally._

He hands her a tissue from the coffee table, then reaches back to grab one for himself. She giggles, and they are finally smiling.

"So your list is pretty skewed toward the cons," he says, scooting closer to her. "But I learned a long time ago that when it comes to you and me and a pro-con list, you have to pick quality over quantity, and your pro is all that matters."

He reaches behind her head to pull her close, gently kissing her lips, before resting his forehead on hers.

"Let's do this, baby. We love each other. We belong together," he says.

She sniffles. "What about your life? Odette?"

" _You_ are my life. I'll take care of everything else," he assures her.

"But I'm such a disaster. Why would you want me?" she asks.

"Ace, come on. You're all I've ever wanted."

She smiles her thousand-watt smile before kissing him deeply. She takes him by the hand and leads him up the stairs. He follows her quickly, before a disturbing thought hits him.

"We can't hurt the baby, can we?"

"No," she says, opening the door to her bedroom. "It's smaller than a grape."

She doesn't need to tell him twice.

* * *

Later that afternoon, Logan wakes up naked in Rory's bed. He watches her sleep for a few minutes, his heart close to bursting.

 _We made a baby. In all the years I've known and loved her, I've never been so in awe of her._

 _My baby is inside her. My tiny, grape-sized baby._

He could lie there forever, but he knows he has some unpleasant business to attend to. He slides out of bed and pulls on some clothes before heading downstairs.

He calls Odette first. "Is she pregnant?" she asks when she answers the phone.

"You couldn't have clued me in?" he asks.

"It just came to me this morning," she says. "But it's good? This is what you want?"

"Yes," he says. "And I'm sorry."

"Don't be. There's a reason I never unpacked any of my things."

She is gracious and supportive, volunteering to tell her parents herself.

The next phone call will be tougher. He doesn't expect his father to be gracious or supportive.

"Dad, I need to talk to you about something," he begins.

"Where are you?" Mitchum interjects. "I called your office today to go over the Folsom deal, and they told me you didn't come in this morning."

"I'm in Hartford."

"Oh… Is everything alright?" Mitchum asks awkwardly.

"I think so, but I'm not sure if you'll think so."

Mitchum sighs. "Is this about Rory Gilmore?"

Logan doesn't answer at first.

"Christ, Logan. You're going to give your mother a heart attack. Just break it off with Odette now, so your mother won't have to deal with the embarrassment of it all."

"That's already done," Logan says. "But the bigger news… is that Rory and I are having a baby."

"Oh, for fuck's sake… Just when I think you've become responsible… Well, I guess congratulations are in order, but you're going to have to tell your mother. I'm not going to do it for you. And I want you to meet with lawyers soon. You need to have your living will amended, and there will be a pre-nup. That's non-negotiable."

"Woah. We haven't even talked about marriage. But I have to say, I'm little surprised at this reaction. You're awfully calm," Logan says.

"Would you rather I threw a fit?"

"No. But I was sure you would threaten my job."

"You will have to sort this out with Jean on your own. But otherwise, will this affect your job?" Mitchum asks.

"I don't think so. But I don't know where I'll be living or…"

"Figure it out. Soon," Mitchum commands. "Because if it starts to affect your job, I won't be so calm."

"I can't believe how well you're taking this," Logan muses.

"Son, I've been waiting on this conversation since I saw you two together last spring. And honestly, I don't care who you marry. I just want you settled. Now your mother does care, and she will raise hell. Just keep me out of it. And get back to work soon. I'm ready to close the Folsom account."

 _That was so much better than I expected. Every once in a while, the old man surprises me._

 _Now for Shira…_

* * *

Logan has listened to Shira berate him for what feels like an eternity.

"Mom. Mom," he cuts her off. "I've already apologized, several times, for any embarrassment this may cause you, but this is what is happening. I'm not going back to Odette. I'm not changing my mind."

"You're really going to give everything up for Rory Gilmore?" she asks.

"I'm not giving up anything," he says.

"What if she leaves you again?"

Logan is quiet for a moment, because, truthfully, he fears this too.

"Mom, just please try and remember that she makes me happy, and I know, deep down, you want me to be happy. We'll talk later, alright?"

Shira sighs deeply. "Alright."

He hangs up and takes a few deep breaths, trying to relieve some of the tension that built up during that conversation. Finally, he heads back upstairs to Rory's room, expecting to find her still asleep. Instead, he finds her sitting up in bed, writing in a journal.

When she sees him walk in, she snaps the book shut guiltily.

"Whatcha doin?" he asks, narrowing his eyes.

"Nothing. Where did you go?"

"Ace. Let's not keep secrets on the first day. What are you writing?"

She bites her lip. "A pro-con list."

 _What? I thought…_

He begins to panic. "I thought we had decided all that. I just told Odette and my parents that we're having a baby."

"Wow. Already?"

"Yes. I thought we had decided…"

"No, Logan. We did. It's not about that." She looks at him a beat too long.

"Oh… _oh_ …"

 _It's me. She's making a pro-con list about me._

"Logan, I'm sorry. I'm just scared."

He moves to sit next to her on the bed. "I'm scared too."

"Really? You're never scared of anything."

Yeah, well loving you… trusting you… is really fucking scary," he says. "It hasn't always worked out for me in the past."

Her eyes blink rapidly, taking in his words.

"Fine. What's on it?" he asks.

"I just started," she says.

"How many cons?"

"Two," she says sheepishly.

"And you _just_ started." _How many will there be when she's done?_

 _Stay calm._

He reaches for her hand, trying to quell his nerves. "I know we're scared, but some wise kid once said 'People can live to be a thousand… no… people can live to be one hundred, but… they have to… live… in the moment?' What the hell did I say?" he asks with a laugh.

She laughs too. "You said 'People can live for a hundred years without living for a minute. You climb up here with me, it's one less minute you haven't lived.'"

"Okay. Pro number one. I've got great lines," he quips.

"Great?" she asks.

"I _got_ you, didn't I? And you still remember it twelve years later."

"True. Okay, I'll give you that one. Great lines."

He leans down and presses a kiss to her still-flat stomach. "Ace, we have every reason to try."

She puts her hands in his hair and rakes her fingernails through it. He moves down to her hip bone, placing small kisses over her abdomen where his baby is.

 _Our baby._

 _I'm going to convince her. And pretty soon everyone will know she's mine, and that I put a baby inside her._

His tongue traces the edge of her panties, and she takes her hands out of his hair long enough to push them down. He takes the hint and pulls them off her legs, before slowly moving back in where she wants him.

 _We're supposed to be talking. I'm supposed to be convincing her that I'm worth taking a chance on._

"Pro number two," she says. "Nobody is better than you at oral sex."

 _So maybe I'm convincing her._

"Any sex. All sex. Nobody is better than you at sex," she says in a breathy whisper.

"Damn right," he murmurs, his mouth against her. "Pro number three. I will prove it you… every… single… day." He alternates his words with swirls of his tongue.

"Oh God… Okay. This is probably the only pro I need."

 _Convinced._

* * *

Later, he is lying beside her, running his hand over her belly. "So my pros are good lines and good sex?"

"Great lines. And mind-blowing, Earth-shattering sex," she clarifies.

He smiles, then swallows hard. "Let's walk through the cons. And I get a say this time."

"Are you sure?" she asks.

"Yes. I think so. Just go."

"Well, first, your family. They are not going to be happy about this."

"I've already told my parents. Mitchum was really calm. He thinks this was inevitable, and he just wants me settled enough to focus on work."

"No way," she says.

"Yeah. He's always liked you. You remind him of his college girlfriend. And my mom… Well, she's not thrilled. But she'll want to be a part of the baby's life. It's ironic since she didn't want to be a part of mine or Honor's life. But she does love the grandkids.

And there was a time when Honor loved you. You haven't been her favorite for the last few years, but _I'm_ still her favorite. Once I tell her that I want you and the baby more than anything, she'll come around."

Rory's mouth crinkles to the side, like she is about to cry again so he presses her. "Can we cross that one off the list?"

She nods, blinking furiously.

"The next one. You live in London, and I live here," she says.

"This one's harder. I love London. The first time I was there, I only thought about getting back to you, and I barely paid the city any attention. This time, I was getting away from you, and-"

"What?"

"That's a story for another day," he says. "The point is… I've really built a life there. I have friends, and I'm really good at my job. Obviously, I'm going to live wherever you and the baby are, so just tell me what you want."

She looks at him and smiles. "I've been rootless for over a year. It's not all it's cracked up to be. Turns out, I like roots."

"So what are you saying?"

"I'll move to London. We can cross that off the list too."

Logan knows that he is radiating happiness as he leans over to kiss her. "We're on a roll. Any others you can think of?"

"No. I'm getting the idea that you're pretty determined to make this work. So I think it's really just going to come down to your promise to give me head every day," Rory says with a mischievous smile.

Logan laughs out loud. "Oh, you just try and stop me!"

* * *

"I don't want to go," Logan whines at Emily's front door two days later. "I want to stay with you. I want to do Christmas together. Remember how good we are at Christmas?"

"I know. I wish you didn't have to go either. But I need Mitchum on my side. And that means you have to go back and do this Folgers thing," she says.

Logan smiles. _She's so cute when she tries to talk business._

"You're right. But it doesn't mean I like it," he says, kissing her and pulling her body flush to his. "Can't you come sooner?"

"Babe, I have to shut down the Gazette and pack up my whole life. I need to say goodbye to Paris and Lane. And then there's the little matter of telling Mom, Luke, and Grandma that I'm moving to another country and raising my child there. You can survive two weeks without me."

"I don't know. I've done a pretty shitty job of it the last nine years." He kisses her again. "And since one of the things we've agreed on is not to let words go unspoken anymore… I just want to say that, obviously, 'Vegas' does not apply anymore. No Paul, no Jess, no random droids."

"It was a Wookie."

"That doesn't make it sound any better, Ace."

"I may see Jess at Christmas. But Luke is his uncle. It has nothing to do with me," she says.

Logan gives her a skeptical look.

"I promise."

"Well, just make sure he knows that we're back together," he says.

She nods and replies "Of course. And as for you… no Odette, no models, no dentists."

Logan raises his eyebrows.

"I may have done a deep dive on your Facebook last night while you were working," she admits.

"I won't even have any time for any of that. I'll be clearing out drawers, stocking up on decaf, and buying new bookcases."

"And the next time you see me, I'll be there for good. Over the last two days, I've let you in on the entire disaster that is my life. This is your last chance to back out, Huntzberger."

"Never," he says. "You're it for me, Rory. Your mess is mine."

* * *

A/N: Congratulations on making it through 21,000 words of angst! Whew! As a reward, there are two short chapters left that are all fluff :)

I apologize for any typos that may have snuck through. I just couldn't proof it anymore. Let me know what you think!


	11. 2017

**Author Note:** This has been written since about a week after the revival, and I am so happy to finally be able to share it with you! Thank you all for such lovely and amazing reviews on the last chapter. It really motivated me to get this one out quickly.

I do not own any characters.

Logan's inner thoughts in italics.

* * *

 **January 2017**

"Jean," Logan says, standing as the older man enters his office. "I… I've been meaning to-"

"This is my letter of resignation. I'm giving it to you first."

"You don't have to do this. We can work this out," Logan says.

"I have never been so disrespected in my life, and I won't stand for it!" Jean declares.

"I never meant to disrespect you, and I'm sorry," Logan says. "I care about Odette, and I know you do too. She does not want to marry me either. This is what's going to make us happy."

Jean stares at Logan silently.

"I will not accept this resignation, and I'm sure my father won't either. You are invaluable to this company, and we can't let a personal difference keep us from being the biggest media company in the world. Please… Please accept my apology, and…"

Logan trails off as Jean turns around and strides out of his office.

 _Shit. He is not happy. Odette told me that, but…_

 _I thought she was exaggerating. Even Mitchum isn't taking it this hard._

The last few months have taught Logan a few things, so he chases Jean back into his office. He walks in and closes the door behind him.

"Okay. Yell at me as much as you want," he tells Jean. "Get it all out of your system. You and I have had a great working relationship for years. I'm not letting that crumble because you're mad at me personally."

Jean unleashes a torrent of insults, only some of which Logan can understand, as he slips in between French and English.

"I know. You're right," Logan agrees over and over.

 _I am a selfish, spoiled enfoire. Whatever that means..._

He continues to sit and ingest everything Jean says to him. He swallows his pride and takes his lumps.

 _I did a lot of stupid things last year, and this is my punishment. But I'm not going to let him leave. He has strong connections and an intense negotiating style that can't be matched by anyone else here._

 _And maybe I can get him to forgive Odette._

Eventually, Jean tires of berating him, and dismisses him coolly.

Embarrassed and ashamed, Logan slinks out and heads back to his office to collect his things.

 _I'm going home._

He opens the door to their flat to find Rory putting her books up in the new bookshelves that Logan put together after Christmas.

"Hey, babe! How was your day?" she asks.

"Tough."

Seeing the expression on his face, she drops the book in her hand back into the moving box and comes over to him.

"What can I do?" she asks, wrapping her arms around his waist.

He instantly relaxes. "Nothing. It's just enough that you're here."

* * *

 **February 2017**

"Hi!" Logan says to Honor when she answers the phone.

"Hey. What's going on?" she responds.

"I just wanted to call and see how you guys were. You know, checking in…"

"Logan, I've already told you this is not necessary. I'm not mad at you," she says.

"No, I know… I just wanted to say 'hi', because I love you, and you are a very important part of my life."

"Oh, come on. What do you really want?" she asks, laughing.

"I just wanted to reiterate that I didn't tell _anyone_ about Rory, not just you. The only people who knew were people who caught us together. And as soon as it was out in the open, you were one of the first people I called."

"Logan, I'm not mad anymore. You don't have to give me this speech every week."

"Okay. But I love you, and I'm never trying to leave you out of my life. And on that note… I want to run something by you. I would like to still come in April to visit you guys like I normally do. And I want Rory to come with me."

"Sure," she says curtly.

"Because you used to love her too. And I just think, if you guys talk… maybe…"

"Okay."

"Because this time is it, Honor. She's going to be around for the rest of my life, and I don't want-"

"Logan, I said it was fine."

 _But your voice is so…_

"And… I'm thinking about maybe asking her to marry me. Maybe when we're there, and I would love it if you would help me plan it," Logan says. "I want you to be a part of all of the things going on in my life."

There is a distinct pause.

"Have you talked to her about it this time? Made sure she is in the same place as you?"

 _Ouch._

"Um… yes, but not so much as… We talk about the future a lot. We laughed at Dad demanding a pre-nup."

"But she hasn't said 'Logan, I want to get married'?"

"Not in those exact words. No. But she has said… many times… that she wishes she had said yes the last time. So I'm pretty confident here. You know that I would not even fathom this if I weren't sure," Logan says.

There is, again, a distinct pause.

 _What if she's right? Would she say no?_

 _No. She definitely wants to get married. I can tell. She said she regrets saying no the first time._

 _She's been dropping all kinds of hints._

"What are you not saying?" Logan asks.

"I just want you to be sure. This seems like it's going really fast. What's the harm in waiting a little while? Just have the baby and then see where you are. How you feel."

"Honor, I've been waiting to marry her for years. I know how I feel. And how she feels. And, I promise that she's all in with me."

 _Since December, we have not left words unsaid. She loves me, and she loves our life together._

"If this is what you want…"

"It is."

"Okay, bring her in April," Honor says. "I promise to have an open mind, and I'll work at it. I used to think of her as a sister, and I can get there again."

"Thanks, Honor. I gotta go, but I'll call you soon."

He hangs up and turns his attention back to his lunch.

 _I hope she comes around. It's hard enough with Mom and Dad…_

Within a minute, he gets a text message from her.

 **What if we do an escape room and at the end, you're waiting there with the ring. Do you need help with a ring?**

Logan smiles.

* * *

 **March 2017**

Logan rubs Rory's feet as he sits on the couch watching soccer. She is reading a book, only glancing up occasionally.

"I can't believe how into soccer you are," she muses.

"I've lived here a long time now. There's just no escaping it. I tried, believe me."

"It just seems like such a silly game, with the- ooh!"

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" Logan asks.

"He's kicking! Oh my God! He's kicking! Here… Give me your hand," she says.

Sure enough, after a moment, he feels the faintest push against his hand.

"Holy shit… That makes it feel so real. There is actually a person in there. Kicking… inside your belly. A little soccer player, Ace!"

The baby kicks again, causing both Rory and Logan to smile. He leans down to kiss her, whispering "I love you" before sitting up, pulling her feet back into his lap, and turning his attention back to the game.

He feels her eyes. Turning to glance at her, she is staring at him intently.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asks her.

She nods, then pulls her legs back to sit up. She takes his hands and pulls them into her lap.

"Logan, I love you."

"Ace, I know."

"No, I mean… I love you more than I thought I could, and I've always loved you a lot… even when I haven't been able to say it," she says, her voice breaking.

 _Okay. She's being really serious here._

He clicks the television off and turns to face her.

"You give me everything," she continues. "Unconditional support, both emotional and financial. You literally put a roof over my head. You love me fiercely, unafraid… and I know you're going to be the same kind of dad. I just feel like I don't offer you… nearly as much."

 _Where is she going with this?_

"Rory-"

"No, I'm on a roll. Let me finish. You are the king of romantic gestures. You never let anything get in the way of letting me know how you feel about me... and I need to take a chance too. So that you know that I love you and the little guy just as fiercely. It's my turn to be the brave one."

She gets off the couch and sinks to her knees in front of him, still holding both of his hands.

"Logan, will you marry me?" she asks quietly.

His mouth literally drops open.

 _Little minx. She's stealing my thunder. I had this all planned for next weekend._

"You're not saying anything."

He closes his mouth. _Does she think I'm going to say no?_

Her face flushes, and she looks so adorably nervous, that he can't help but tease her a bit.

"Wow… Wow…" he says sarcastically.

Rory rolls her eyes. "Cute."

"I might need to take the night to make a pro-con list," he says, continuing the farce.

She smiles. "Well, I can't offer you an avocado tree, but I can promise to let you wake up next to me and the kid every day."

"Wow… That sounds _amazing_. Can I talk to my mom and get back to you?"

"Lo-gan! I am almost six months pregnant here! And I'm on my knees. Put me out of my misery," she begs.

"Almost," he says. He lifts her up and sets her back onto the couch. "Give me one second."

He races over to his sock drawer where he has been hiding the ring. He brings it back to the couch, opens the box to her, and says "I want nothing more than to marry you, Rory Gilmore."

Rory takes in the bright blue center stone, and a tear escapes her eye, rolling down her cheek.

"Is that the ring from…?"

"It is. I bought it all those years ago at the same time I got… the other ring. I had thought it would be the perfect gift for you for the next Christmas. And… well, I obviously didn't give it to you then, but I always held on to it. It's the exact same color as your eyes, and I could never part with it. Last month, I had the band changed out so that it would look more like an engagement ring. I had the whole thing planned for when we were in New York next weekend."

"Oh, I had no idea. I'm sorry I ruined it," she says.

"This was even better," he says, kissing her. "Can I put it on you?"

"Yes, of course!" she says, and he slips the ring on her finger.

He kisses her again, and then leans down to talk to her belly.

"Did you hear that little guy? Your parents are getting married. You're going to be legitimate."

"Well, we would have to plan a wedding really quickly for that," Rory says.

Logan is quiet for a moment. "What if we do it next weekend in New York? Justice of the peace. Whoever can be there will be there. We have plans with Josh and Honor for my birthday, and we can just make that the reception."

Rory's eyes widen. "But there's stuff to plan!"

"All I need is you and the kid. I know that you need Lorelei, but… We've wasted so much time already. I just can't wait anymore until you're Mrs. Logan Huntz-"

He pauses at her raised eyebrow, and changes course.

"I can't wait until you're Ms. Rory Gilmore, wife of Logan Huntzberger."

She smiles tightly before sitting for a moment in pensive thought. "You know what... The old me would hem and haw and finds ways to say no. But the new me… the me that I want to be… I think you're right. We have wasted too much time. Let's do it!"

* * *

 **April 2017**

Logan is pacing Honor's living room in his favorite navy suit. He stops to check his reflection in the entry hall, straightening the periwinkle and lavender striped tie that Rory had picked out for him.

Honor approaches him, with Charlie on her hip. "You look great. Just try and relax," she says.

"It _is_ about time to go," Luke interjects. "I'll go see what's keeping Rory and Lorelei."

"No, I'll go get them," Logan says, heading toward Honor's guest room.

 _Gotta keep moving. Get all the nervous energy out._

Logan can hear their voices from behind the bathroom door. He is about to knock when he hears Lorelei.

"Hon, are you sure about this?"

He knows he should make his presence known, but he wants to hear Rory's response.

"About Logan? Yes, I'm sure."

He breathes a sigh of relief and again raises his arm to knock when he hears Lorelei continue.

"It just seems so quick, kiddo. He was engaged to someone else four months ago."

Logan backs away from the door, but their voices carry.

 _I should not be listening to this._

"Are you serious, Mom?"

"Is there something about me that seems _not_ serious right now?"

Her tone makes Logan flinch. He still feels like he should leave, but he can't drag himself away.

Rory replies. "I'm going to tell you what you told me when you married Dad. In some ways, it is quick. And in other ways, it's been years in the making."

"And you know how well that turned out," Lorelei says.

"Well, I'm not you. And Logan is not Dad."

"I can see a couple of similarities," Lorelei says.

Logan feels his anger creeping up, and he does his best to tamp it down. _You've always known that Lorelei is not your biggest fan._

"What? Besides having money. Logan is responsible and dependable and loving and… he's the one. Mom, I'm totally sure about this, and I'd like for you to be happy for me."

"I want to be," Lorelei says. "I've just… I've never trusted him."

"Well you're not marrying him," Rory says, opening the bathroom door and stopping in her tracks when she sees him sitting on the bed. He gives her a tight smile, and she beams back. " _I'm_ marrying him."

Logan stands as Lorelei moves past. "I'll wait for you guys in the living room," she says quietly, disappearing down the hall.

Rory walks over to him, taking his hands and interlacing their fingers.

"How much of that did you hear?" she asks.

"Um, I think all of it," he replies.

"I'm sorry."

"No, it's okay. As long as she didn't change your mind."

"No way. You're stuck with me, Huntzberger."

"Lucky me. You look gorgeous," he says, taking her in. She is wearing a light blue fitted dress that shows off her bump. A purple polka-dotted cardigan sits atop her shoulders, and her sapphires sparkle from her ears and hand.

"So do you," she says stretching up to kiss his lips. "I have a gift for you before we leave." She reaches into her bag and retrieves a small box.

"We're doing this so fast that we don't have a ring for you. I thought you might want this," Rory says.

Logan opens it to find a simple gold band.

"It was Grandpa's," she continues. "He always liked you, and he wanted us to get it right. Grandma gave it to me last night. She wants you to have it."

Logan doesn't know what to say. "Are you sure?"

She nods. "We had our first kiss at their vow renewal, and they were married for fifty years. I can't imagine anything more perfect."

Logan puts the box in his inner breast pocket and says "I love it. And I have something for you too. It's not as good as this, and it's in London."

"That's okay. You can give it to me later."

"But I want to tell you what it is. I hope it's okay. I should have asked you about this first."

"Okay, now you're making me nervous."

"So you know the Everlys? Next door? They're moving full time to their country house in Cardiff, and… I bought their flat. I got board approval, and it's being renovated as we speak. It'll just be one big place. That way you'll have a room to write, and there will be places for your mom and Emily to stay when they visit. And we'll finally get a bedroom door. And now that I'm saying this out loud, I realize I should have consulted you before I did something so grand in scale and cost. I was just excited."

"Babe, it's your money."

"No. It's _our_ money."

"It sounds amazing. It's the perfect wedding gift. We absolutely need a bedroom door, especially now that we won't be the only people there. But are you sure you're going to want my mom to visit after what she just said?" Rory asks.

"How can I convince her she's wrong if I don't let her see how great I am?"

"Man, I love you," she says, kissing him again.

"Mmm. Me too. Now can we go get married?"

* * *

Logan stands up in front of his friends and family and taps his glass with a spoon.

When the talking dies out, he says "I'd like to say something if I could."

"Your day, mate," Finn shouts.

Logan nods, swallows his nerves, and begins.

"My sister, Honor, got married ten years ago, and I remember listening to her and Josh recite their vows. I distinctly remember thinking that when I married Rory… that I wanted to write my own vows. Although the timing is not exactly what I had planned, my sentiments are the same. So I wrote down some thoughts.

But as it turns out, when you get married by a judge in a courtroom on a busy Friday afternoon in New York City, they don't allow any time for heartfelt vows. So… I'm going to do it now."

Rory's eyes are wide as Stephanie hands him his journal. Logan smiles to reassure her, then flips open to the page where he has written down his most personal thoughts.

"There were twenty-two years of my life before I met you, Rory Gilmore. My parents will tell you that I was a handful. My friends will tell you that I was the life of every party. But honestly, I don't have many concrete memories from that time. Looking back on it, my world looks out of focus.

But Rory, while we know that I don't actually remember the first time, I very clearly remember the second time I met you. Obviously, I thought you were hot, but you were also funny and witty and confident. And completely unimpressed by me. You were different than any girl I had ever met, and I was instantly intrigued.

And because this was all new to me, I was a little slow on the uptake. It was a few months before I realized I wanted to be your boyfriend, and several months after that before I realized I loved you. And almost a year after that before I knew I wanted to marry you.

But it didn't all go according to my plan, and in the intervening years, although I faked it as best I could, I was miserable. My world was again out of focus.

Because from California to New York to London, no matter where I lived or who I met, I could not shake the feeling that I was supposed to be with you, Rory."

Logan pauses to look at Rory, who is beaming up at him.

"So I could not believe my luck when fate dropped you on the sidewalk in Hamburg… right in front of me. Suddenly my world felt sharp and crisp again with all of the fuzziness falling back to the periphery. This time it did not take me so long to realize that I wanted to be your boyfriend, that I loved you… That I wanted to marry you.

Rory, we have spent the last year trying our best to ruin this. But it turns out… you just can't fight destiny. Because, what I'm saying, Ace… is that we're lobsters."

Rory throws her head back in laughter, and Logan smiles at her before continuing.

"You are my best friend, my true love, and soon to be the mother of our son. So, Rory, I stand here today to swear to you that I will always love you. That I will honor and cherish you and our family. For better or worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until I take my last breath.

I stand here before you today on the day when I finally, finally get to marry you, and it is the best day of my life."

He closes his journal, and looks down at Rory, who is wiping tears away. She stands and kisses his lips longer and deeper than she ever has in public. She finally breaks away to the cheers and whistles of their family and friends to bury her face in his neck and whisper "I love you, too. So much."

He squeezes her tight before turning back to the group.

"And while I'm up here, I want to acknowledge all of you who have been on this roller coaster with us. I want to thank you, Lorelei. And Luke, Christopher, Emily… and Richard… for raising Rory into this amazing woman."

 _Oh my God. I've made Lorelei cry._

"I want to thank my parents and Honor and Josh because I know I can be a huge pain in the ass, but I… I do love you guys."

 _And I appreciate that you've somehow stayed civil this weekend._

"And to our friends…"

He looks over to Paris, Lane, Zach, Stephanie, Colin, Finn, and Andy. "Thanks for all of the years we've counted on you. And for being here today. I know it was short notice."

"To Rory and Logan," Finn calls as the group collectively raise their glasses.

Rory waits for the din to die down before she speaks. "We all know that I am normally a woman of _many_ words. But in my current hormonal state, I'm not sure I can get through anything. And I can't say it better than Logan just did. I'm so happy you were all able to be here with us today. To help us finally get it right. And I also especially want to thank Honor for putting all of this together in nine days. It's just been perfect… And I guess there's nothing left to do but eat cake!"

As the group turns towards the cake, Logan kisses his wife again. "Let's get you some cake."

* * *

An hour later, Honor hands him his bag and shoos them to the door. "You guys need to go. It's your wedding night."

"But… we were-" Logan starts.

"St. Regis. It's in my name. And you both have spa services booked for tomorrow," Honor says.

Logan hugs her tight. "Thank you. For everything."

"Logan, can you give us a second?" Rory asks.

"Um… Yeah, okay. I'll just… go say goodbye to everyone."

Logan circles the room, saying his goodbyes, all the while keeping a close eye on Rory and Honor.

 _I hope they don't get into an argument here in front of everyone..._

They seem to be talking in earnest, and their smiles ease his nerves.

A few minutes later, he heads over to collect her. "Everything okay over here?" he asks.

"Yes," Honor says. "You guys go. I'll see you tomorrow."

"What was that about?" he asks Rory in the elevator.

"I wanted to thank her again. And to make sure she knew that I know I haven't been perfect when it comes to you, but that… I love you more than anything."

"What did she say?"

"She's very protective of you," Rory deflects.

"Was she nice?"

"Perfectly. Logan, we're fine. And I'm going to prove to her that you made the right choice when you picked me."

He kisses her right there in the elevator. On the sidewalk… in the cab… in the lobby of the hotel… in the elevator… at the door… He can't stop kissing her.

"Logan, this will progress faster, if you stop kissing me, and open the door," she laughs.

They push into the suite to find rose petals covering the bed. Sparkling grape juice is chilling in a champagne bucket, and Rory picks up a gift with her name on it.

"Honor told me what this is, so… I'm going to go to the bathroom and put this on. You just… get comfortable. Get naked," Rory says with a grin.

A few minutes later, she emerges wearing white lingerie.

"This is not what I envisioned looking like on my wedding night," she says, rubbing her belly.

"You're beautiful," he assures her.

She comes to him and sits next to him on the bed. "But… You... _You_ are always who I envisioned looking _at_ on my wedding night. And that's much more important."

Logan feels his heart melt. Over the last few months, he has had to readjust to Rory saying things like that again.

 _It will never get old. And I will never take it for granted._

* * *

 **June 2017**

"We're five weeks away, Rory. We've got to seriously talk names," Logan begs.

"I know, but it's such a huge responsibility," she says. "We get it wrong, and it sets him up for failure for the rest of his life."

Logan laughs. "And we certainly can't have that. So let's start with what we know. You want to use Richard somehow, right?"

"Yes, but I think it has to be the middle name. Richard just doesn't work for a baby. And Ricky sounds like a trouble-making teenager from a cheesy eighties movie."

"There is always Dick," Logan offers, grinning.

She ignores him. "So I would like Richard to be the middle name if it sounds good with the first name we choose. And you're still saying no to Caden?"

"I just think it's too close to Aiden," he says, referencing Honor's oldest.

"Ugh. Why did Honor get to choose?" Rory asks.

"Because she said yes the first time Josh asked," he quips.

"Fair point. So should we circle back to Beckett, Callum, Kellen? All of the Irish names we like for our British baby?"

"I mean… I like all of those," Logan says. "And you and I have Irish names. They just don't mean anything to me. Which is fine, I guess. Richard means something."

"No, let's keep thinking. There has to be something that we like _and_ means something," she says.

"Should we get one of those books?" he asks. "With all the names and what they mean."

Rory looks over at the floor to ceiling bookshelves that are filled to overflowing. "Like we need another book." She waddles over to the shelf, running her hands along the spines until she finds one that catches her interest.

"What about Jay?" she asks, handing him The Great Gatsby. "It's your favorite. And he's so romantic, just like you are. He changed his whole life for Daisy."

Logan smiles. "Until she rejected him and got him killed. He is my favorite, but maybe his story is too tragic."

 _I do like where she's going with this._

Suddenly, inspiration hits, and he joins her at the bookcase.

He finds Pride and Prejudice, pulls it off the shelf, and hands it to her.

"Oh my God! Is this mine?" she asks.

"I've had it for ten years, Gilmore. I think it's common-law mine."

"Do you ever read it?" she asks.

"I've re-read it every year on your birthday since you gave it to me. And yes, I know how pathetic that is. After a few years, I could just skim it, I knew it so well."

"See. You're so romantic." She sits back down on the couch and smiles as she finds the note she wrote so many years ago. "You have pages dog-eared."

"On my favorite parts," he says sitting down opposite her.

She flips to the first one and reads for a moment.

Logan quotes. "My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."

"She is so harsh when she refuses him," Rory comments.

"I have to tell you, Ace. There is no nice way to reject a man's proposal."

She looks up frowning. "I'm so sorry."

 _It's not important anymore._

He shakes his head, and she flips to the next marked page. "Ooh. This is when Darcy comes back to Longbourn, and she…"

She looks up at him, and Logan begins to quote again.

"I believe I thought only of you. You are too generous to trifle with me. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes are unchanged."

Rory comes over and sits in his lap, tucking her head into the crook of his neck.

He wraps his arms around her and says quietly "I always hoped you'd change your mind and realize that I was the right man for you."

"I'm sorry it took me so long," she whispers.

"It's okay. We're here now. And I know Fitzwilliam is a little old-fashioned. But what do you think about naming the baby William? After a guy who refused to give up on his girl, even though he probably should have."

"Oh, sweetie. It's perfect!" she says.

"William Richard Gilmore-Huntzberger," he says, trying it out.

"I've been thinking about that too. You know all of the reasons that I didn't change my name, but hyphenating is really going to be a lot on the kid. I mean… it will never fit on the back of a soccer jersey."

Logan smirks. "Please. Like you care about his sports prospects."

"No, but you do. I care that it will never fit on a magazine subscription label," she says with a laugh.

"So are we settled? William Richard Huntzberger?" he asks.

"I love it," Rory says. "I love you."

* * *

 **July 2017**

They wake up the morning of Rory's due date with nervous anticipation.

"I've got to run into the office for a little bit today, but I won't be away from my phone. Call me if anything happens," Logan says.

He checks in with her multiple times throughout the day, but everything is quiet.

That night as they lay in bed, Rory says "I know it's just an arbitrary date that my OB picked forty weeks ago, but missing it really makes me feel like a failure."

"I know. It's been nine months of buildup. But it's gonna happen any day now, baby."

"Ten months. It's ten months," Rory says with a sigh.

* * *

Four days later, Rory calls him at work. Logan ducks out of a meeting to answer.

"Hey! Anything?"

"No," she says glumly. "I'm losing my mind here. The flat is so clean I could lick the floors. I ate eggplant parmesan for lunch again today. And I don't like eggplant."

"Well, what else can we try?"

"I'm going to go out for a walk, I guess," she says.

"Okay. Take your phone and be careful. I'll try and come home early, okay?"

Logan walks in the door around four o'clock that afternoon to find Rory sitting at the kitchen table reading on her tablet.

"Nothing?" he asks, planting a kiss on the top of her head.

"No, but I just read something else we can try."

"What?" he asks, taking off his jacket.

She stands up and pulls him close by the tie. "We can have sex," she whispers before kissing him passionately.

 _Oh, hell yeah. We haven't had sex in weeks._

She loosens his tie enough to pull it over his head before moving her hand down to his crotch. She pulls back slightly and says "I know it's been a while, and I'm not that attractive right now…"

"Ace, I always find you attractive. That's not an issue… But we can't hurt him, can we?" he asks nervously sitting down in a kitchen chair.

 _I don't want him to come out with a big dent in his head._

"No, but maybe we can get him moving." She unbuckles his pants, gets down on her knees, and pulls all of his clothes off. She puts her hands and tongue everywhere.

"So aggressive. I like it," Logan says, chuckling.

"I'm desperate."

"Just what every man wants to hear," Logan quips.

"Hush."

A few moments later, she pulls off of him. "Is this helping?"

 _You're blowing me in the kitchen so it's definitely not hurting…_

"Yeah, come here," he says pulling her up and removing the rest of her clothes. He runs his hands all over her new curves and whispers "Let's go upstairs. You'll be more comfortable in bed."

Once in the bedroom, they awkwardly look at each other.

"How do you want to do this?" he asks.

"Missionary should still work, right?" she says as she heaves herself onto the bed. "I do have to prop up just a little… Okay, come here."

He joins her on the bed and makes an attempt. "I can't… Can you tilt your hips up a little bit…? Um… I can't get in there, babe. Your belly…"

"Maybe I can still get on top. My stomach won't be in the way then," she offers.

"Sounds good." He lays down beside her and smiles. "Climb on, Ace."

She straddles him and lowers herself down. "Yeah?"

"Oh, yeah," he replies.

She puts her hands on his chest and tries to lean forward a little. "I can't move," she whimpers.

"Don't worry. I'll move you," he says.

He grabs her hips, but her body is situated on him like dead weight, and he can't move her either. "Um…"

 _Fuck…_

"Let's spoon," she says.

"Yep."

They reorient themselves, and Logan enters her from behind where all the movement is up to him.

 _Finally… This'll work._

He thrusts forward and hears Rory gasp "Oh!"

"Oh- good? Or…"

"No, it's fine. Keep going," she says.

He moves inside her again.

"Uhnnnn."

"What?"

"It's just… I think you're hitting my bladder, and it's making me pee," she says.

Logan sighs. "I don't think this is going to work, Ace."

"Logan. We are not quitters, and for the sake of my mental health… I am asking you to find a way to fuck me."

 _Normally I would die for talk like that…_

He racks his brain. "Okay… Okay… What if… Okay let me stand, and you scoot here. Right here on the edge of the bed." He enters her once again. "Can you wrap your legs around me?"

She tries, and it's kind of working, but…

 _It's gotten so technical. I'm not really feeling this anymore._

Rory is looking up at him expectantly. "All good?"

"Oh… yeah. All good," he fibs.

"And… I need you to come inside me," she says.

 _What? I don't know if…_

"Why?"

"It's acidic… or something. I don't know. You know I'm not good with science."

"I'll try," he says, continuing to pump in and out of her. "That's just a lot of pressure."

"I'm counting on you, honey," she says through gritted teeth.

 _That helps with the pressure._

He slows down. "It's hard. You don't even look comfortable. I know you're not enjoying this, and I don't like to come if you can't."

"Even though I'm telling you to?"

"I'll try," he says, speeding up again.

"Ooh, yeah. Right there," Rory coos, and he looks down at her. She reaches up to touch her breasts and pinch her nipples. "Fuck me, Logan. Harder."

His eyebrows raise as she moans, but he does what he's told.

"Oh God! Yes!"

 _Oh… She's…_

"I know you're faking," he says. "But it's really hot. Grab your tits again."

She kicks it up a notch, touching herself and talking dirtier and dirtier until he comes hard inside her.

He lies on top of her, panting for a moment, before giving way to laughter. "Are you going to kiss our kid with that filthy mouth?"

"I can't kiss him until he's out of my body. Thanks for doing that."

"Thank _you_. I'll kiss your dirty mouth," he says leaning in for a kiss. "Now… Do you require any off my other services?"

"Maybe some water? I'm just going to lay here and let your magic sperm go to work," she says.

That night, Logan is awakened by Rory rolling out of bed to pee for the third time

"Logan! Logan!" she calls from the bathroom. "I think my water just broke!"

He races into the bathroom to find her standing in a puddle. She raises her arms triumphantly over her head. "Magic sperm!"

* * *

Nine hours later, the doctor informs them it is time to start pushing.

 _Holy shit. This is happening. I'm about to become a father._

He kisses her forehead and steps away to take his place with the nurses.

"Where are you going?" Rory asks anxiously.

He looks at her quizzingly. "To… watch you give birth."

 _Is that what I say? What is the correct term here?_

"No, come back up here," she says.

He returns to her side. "I'm just going to be-"

"No, I want you to stay up here by my face."

"Rory, I wanna-"

"No," she cuts him off again. "A lot of terrible stuff is going to happen down there. I want you to always think my vagina is beautiful and perfect."

Logan glances around at all the nurses, doctors, and techs in the room.

 _I guess modesty and privacy go out the window when you're having a baby._

"Ace," he whispers. "I will always think your vagina is beautiful and perfect."

"Not if you see something scarring that you can never un-see. Just stay up here with me, okay?"

He nods, and kisses her forehead. "Okay. Whatever you need, baby."

He holds her hands and wipes her brow, and forty-five minutes later there is a screaming baby boy. A nurse hands him the scissors, and he moves to cut the cord.

 _Jesus Christ. It's like the red wedding over here. She was probably right._

He moves back up to Rory, who is trying to breast feed Will with a nurse's help. He watches in awe.

"I'm so proud of you, sweetie. That was amazing," he says.

She smiles back at him, then suddenly flinches. "Ow!"

"That means he's latched on," the nurse says. "Feed him for a few minutes, then switch him to the other side."

"Mother fucker!" Rory says when the nurse has walked away. "Normally I like you to be rough with my nipples, but…wow, that hurts."

Logan again glances around to see who all is listening to their private business, but no one is paying them any attention.

 _I guess they hear a lot worse…_

Logan laughs as he looks proudly at his family.

 _My family._

* * *

 **August 2017**

Rory puts Will down in his bouncy seat and buckles him in as Logan peers over her shoulder.

"Can you believe he's six weeks old today?" she asks.

"No. Everyone tells you how fast it goes, but the time really just flies," he agrees.

Logan continues to watch his little man for a moment before leaning into Rory's neck and putting his lips on her.

 _I want her so bad._

"You know," he says with a gentle kiss, "The nurse said that at six weeks, we could…"

"We could what?"

He continues his assault of her neck. "You know…"

He feels her body tense as she slowly turns around to face him.

"I'm not ready, Logan. I'm sorry… I'm just… scared," she says.

 _Shit._

"Okay, no problem. What _exactly_ are you scared of though?' he asks.

"I had thirteen stitches, and you're not small. I mean, do you remember how scared I was to poop?"

 _That's a boner killer._

He backs away from her. "Okay. Whenever you're ready," he says.

"Just give me a little more time."

Two weeks later, on a night they only get up once with the baby, Rory catches him right as he's heading out the door for work. She pulls him by the lapels toward her until she is kissing him deeply.

"Tonight, okay? Be ready."

He pulls back to look into her eyes. "I'm ready now. I can call in sick," he says.

She laughs.

"Babe, I'm serious. It's been two months. And it was only once the month before that."

She pushes him out the door. "Go to work."

She lives in the back of his mind all day.

His last meeting runs late, and he doesn't walk into their flat until 7:00.

"Ace?" he calls out. "I'm sorry I'm so late. Did I miss him?" He drops his bag and rushes up the stairs.

She comes out of Will's room, closing the door behind her. "Yes. I just got him down. He was fussy today… Hi," she says, kissing his lips.

"I hate days when I don't get to see him much. I'll get up with him tonight," Logan says.

She ignores his words and kisses him again, sliding her tongue into his mouth.

 _Well that didn't take much._

He puts his hands on her hips and pulls her close so she can feel how hard he already is.

"Down boy," she laughs. "Give me a minute to change. There's spit up on my shirt."

"Sorry. I've just been thinking about you all day."

"That's okay. Have some wine," she says, pouring two glasses.

She downs hers quickly and pours herself another glass.

"You need to be drunk for this?" he asks, grinning.

"Of course not. Just loosening up. Hopefully, literally. Give me a few minutes and then you can come in, okay?" She disappears with her wine glass into their bedroom.

Logan takes off his jacket and tie before moving through the flat, closing blinds and drawing shades.

He's so hard, he's not sure he'll even make it to her, so he concentrates on counting his breaths and not touching himself.

A few minutes later, Rory calls to him from the bedroom. He enters to find lit candles everywhere. She is standing nervously in front of the bed in a black bra and panties.

"I know it doesn't fit at all," she says.

And she is still thicker than normal, but Logan doesn't notice. All he can see is the curve of her hips and the slope of her breasts.

"You look so sexy," he whispers, unbuttoning his shirt before walking over to her and kissing the line of her cleavage.

"I'm busting out of this bra," she giggles.

"So hot," he murmurs, running his tongue along the edge.

 _I'm dying to get to the good stuff, but she's nervous. I need to foreplay the hell out of her._

He unhooks her bra and lays her down, spending a lot of time with her breasts.

 _God, I've missed them. The kid just monopolizes them._

Suddenly, he tastes something oddly sweet.

"Oh my God!" she cries. "My milk just let down."

"Relax, Rory. I don't care," he says, not stopping what he's doing, though there is, in fact, milk spraying everywhere.

Eventually, though, he has to stop. He reaches for a burp cloth off the bedside table to wipe his face, but accidentally knocks a candle over in the process.

"Shit!" he yells, jumping off the bed to set it back up. Nothing seems to be on fire, and he takes that as a sign to carry on.

"Maybe this isn't a good idea," she says.

"No, baby, it's fine."

 _If I don't have sex soon, I will lose my mind._

He lays her back down on the bed and whispers. "Everything's going to be fine. Let me just ease you back in, okay? Try and relax."

Logan kisses his way down her body to settle in between her legs. He tries to start slow and gentle, but she holds her legs tight against his head, and she will barely let him in.

"Ace."

"I'm nervous. Is everything normal?" she asks.

 _Is sex ever going to be sexy again?_

"Rory, your vagina is even more perfect and beautiful than I remembered."

 _Dear Lord. Please just let me go down on my wife._

She finally eases up and lets him do his thing. She gives that contented sigh that he has always loved, and he realizes that he has missed getting her off more than anything.

He crawls up the bed to her, where she is breathing deeply.

 _She looks comatose. She hasn't been sleeping much. I bet she's exhausted._

 _I can manage for another week._

He kisses her cheek. "Go to sleep," he tells her.

"But what about you?" she murmurs.

"I got me. You go to sleep."

"But…

"Rory, go to sleep. Will will be up in few hours."

He pulls the covers over her before heading into the shower.

 _Our life has become this completely new routine of feeding, changing, and sleeping._

 _And for me, masturbating in the shower._

 _Every day blurs into the next._

 _But I've got my girl and my little guy… And they make it all worth it._

 _It's all worth it to feel this wanted, this needed._

 _This loved._

* * *

 **October 2017**

Logan finishes tightening his tie before heading down the stairs for coffee. Rory and Lorelei are at the table sipping mugs as Rory intently reads something on her laptop.

 _I should have known they'd be up together on her first morning here._

"Morning," he says, leaning down to kiss the top of Rory's head. "Is that your HuffPost article?"

"Yes. I'm almost done. I'm going to send it to Eli this morning."

"Who's Eli?" Lorelei asks.

"He's my agent," Rory says. "That's how I've been getting so many freelance articles this last year."

"How did Will do last night? I didn't hear him," Logan says.

"Not well. I ended up falling asleep in there with him, which is probably why you didn't hear anything. I'm exhausted."

"Well, Kay is coming tonight, so just get through the day, and then you'll be able to get a good night's sleep," Logan says.

"Who's Kay?" Lorelei asks.

"She's a night nurse," Logan says. "She came in to help when Rory had mastitis, and it was _so_ helpful, that she comes two nights a week now."

"Yeah. I pump around eight, and then she stays with him until five or so, when I nurse him again," Rory adds. "He sleeps through the night mostly, just not consistently. This guarantees us two nights that we sleep well."

Lorelei laughs. "So there's a driver, an agent, and a night nurse. When do I get to meet Carson and Mrs. Patmore?"

 _She's laughing, but that sounds…_

"Mom…"

"I can stay up with him tonight. You don't need this Kay here," Lorelei says.

"We're all going to Cursed Child for Rory's birthday tomorrow night. She's been waiting since… August?" Logan says.

Rory nods. "I want us all to be awake, Mom. Kay is great. It'll be fine."

Lorelei raises her eyebrows, seeming poised for a rebuttal, when they hear Will over the monitor.

"I'll get him," Lorelei says.

"Let me come with you. I want to see him before I leave for work. I can show you where everything is," Logan says following her back up the stairs.

Logan lets Lorelei lift Will out of the crib, handing her a diaper and some wipes at the changing table.

"His clothes are in these drawers, unless you want to put him in something other than onesies. Real clothes are in the closet." He opens the closet door to her.

"Wow. His closet rivals mine."

"Yeah," Logan says with a laugh. ""Between Emily and Shira, this kid will never want for anything."

"I can see that," she says.

 _Again, that tone is…_

 _I should let it go, but I can't take a chance on ruining any of the progress that we've made._

"Lorelei… Other than Will, you are the most important person in Rory's life. She has… we have…"

"Spit it out, Logan," Lorelei says, cooing at Will.

 _Here goes._

"I don't think it's any secret that Rory has had some problems in the last few years with her… self-doubt. But we've really gotten her back to a happy place. Having a baby throws everything a little out of whack, and we've had to make a lot of adjustments. I know you know what that's like."

Lorelei picks Will up and nods her agreement at him.

"So… being the most important person in her life… Just please think about how everything you say is going to affect her. I know the way we are doing things is not the way you did them with Rory. But we are older, and there's two of us, and we have money."

"I can see that," she says.

 _That's what I'm talking about, and- fuck it._

"That's what I'm talking about. Your tone. It's judgmental. I hear it, and I know she hears it. And I'm asking you to please try and reign it in. Rory is an amazing mother. And she's working. And she's trying not to lose who she is in the midst of all that. This is what works for us, and I would appreciate it if you would respect that," he says.

She stares at him for a moment.

 _Crap. Now she will never like me. I couldn't keep my mouth shut for one goddamn second._

"You're right," she says. "And… I'm sorry. I don't mean to… I'm just sarcastic by nature. But I'll try not to do it in regards to your parenting. Obviously, I also know a thing or two about your parents judging your parenting, and I do not want to do that."

Logan breathes a deep sigh of relief. "Thank you. Now I do have to run out to work. Can I hold him for just a second? Then he's yours all day."

* * *

That night after dinner, Rory and Logan say good-night to Will and Lorelei and retire to their bedroom early.

"I am exhausted," Logan says. "And I know I'm not as tired as you are."

"Take off your clothes."

"What?"

"Take off your clothes," she repeats, stripping off her shirt.

"Babe."

She comes over to him and begins unbuttoning his shirt. "I just pumped, Kay has the monitor, and thanks to the renovations, it feels like my mom is on the other side of town."

"But this is your night to sleep, and I know you need it."

She reaches down and rubs her hand over his crotch. "I want this more. And I only need like five minutes. Take. Off. Your. Clothes."

He kisses her deeply. "I'm gonna give you more than five minutes."

* * *

Later as they are snuggled up naked, Logan feels the exhaustion taking over. He is almost on the verge of sleep, when Rory speaks.

"You know… you were wrong earlier."

"You're going to have to be more specific, Ace," he mumbles.

"This morning. When you were talking to Mom."

His eyes pop open. "She told you what I said? Baby, I'm sorry. I know it wasn't my place, but-"

"Logan, relax. She didn't say a word. I heard you over the baby monitor. And it _was_ your place. Because the thing you were wrong about… She isn't the most important person in my life. You and Will are. And it's not even close."

* * *

A/N: One chapter left!


	12. 2018

Author Note: Almost a year later, and we are finally here! Thank you all for your kind words and your encouragement! As always, Logan's inner thoughts in italics.

All characters belong to Gilmore Girls, WB, Netflix, etc.

* * *

 **January 2018**

"Hey, babe. How was your day?" Rory asks Logan as he walks in the door.

"Fine. Boring. How are my two favorite people?" he asks, kissing both Rory and Will.

"Actually my day was great."

"Oh, yeah? What happened?"

"Will napped really well today, and I was able to finish the final edits on my book," she says.

"Ace, I'm so proud of you," he says.

"And I want you to read it."

"Of course. I would love to."

"Not as my husband though," she adds.

"Well, that's going to be hard to do."

"No, I mean… I want you to read it as a publisher. If it came across your desk," she says.

"Okay, but I'm not really in the print division. This kind of stuff doesn't come across my desk. Do you want me to let one of my print guys read it?"

"Oh, no," she says quickly. "I don't actually want Huntzberger to publish it. I'll shop it to different publishers."

 _Hold up. Is she wanting to actually publish this? I thought… Wait a minute. Why wouldn't she let_ _ **me**_ _publish it?_

"Rory-"

"Don't give it to print. _You're_ my husband. I want _you_ to read it."

"But you just said-"

"I know," she cuts him off again. "You'll figure it out… I know there's a fine line somewhere between personal and professional. I'm sure you can straddle it."

 _Shit. This is going to be tough to navigate._

"Oh, and also… I talked to Mom today, and she wants to know when we'll be home again," Rory continues.

"We were just there for Christmas!" Logan says.

"I know. She just misses us."

"She misses you and Will."

"Logan, she's coming around."

Logan rolls his eyes. "We can probably go back in April. That's usually a downtime for me work-wise, and we can tie it into my visit with Honor."

"Perfect. She wants to throw an anniversary party in Stars Hollow since we didn't have a big wedding they could all come to. And then they can all officially meet Will."

"What if I had said July was the best time?" Logan asks.

"I would have suggested April."

* * *

Logan spends the next week reading Rory's book in any spare time he has. He finds it fascinating on many levels.

 _She is an amazing writer._

 _There is still so much I don't know about her._

 _And most surprisingly, there is some substance here. I thought that writing this story was a cathartic exercise for her. Something to keep her momentum going between projects. But she has written something that may have legs._

Reading the Dean and Jess characters makes him feel nauseated, but when he gets to the lines where he and Rory meet, it is worth the read.

" _I wanted to hate him. He was handsome, privileged, and condescending- everything my mother taught me to resist. But I was constantly thinking about it him; he was always on my mind. And I didn't know it at the time, but he would be for the rest of my life."_

He finishes it on a Thursday night, but when he tries to discuss it with her, she balks.

"You're not my husband right now. Let's schedule a meeting."

"Fine," Logan smirks. "Lunch tomorrow. My office. But get a sitter, because only my wife brings her kid into my office."

She shows up the next day in her lucky red dress.

"Ta-da! I finally lost enough weight to get back in it. It's snug, but it's buttoned."

He walks over to close the door behind her. "You look gorgeous. Wanna skip the meeting and make out?" he asks, laying a kiss on her.

She gives in for a moment before pushing him away. "Nope, meeting. You're a publisher, and I'm a prospective writer."

"That's my favorite dirty fantasy."

"Logan. Seriously."

"Alright. Sit down, Ms. Gilmore," he says, showing her to a chair before walking behind his desk and sitting down.

 _Okay. Honest and supportive. And don't be harsh. Because in reality, she is not a prospective writer. She's my wife_.

"So, the story is actually great," he begins. "Lots of interesting content, great characters, quaint setting. The writing is lovely, maybe at times, a little ramble-y. Lots of similes, but those things are uniquely _you_. And I _love_ you."

"But…"

"But the problem is commercial viability. Comedic memoirs only sell if they're written by famous people. Non-famous folk need tragedy to gain traction, and… fortunately for _you_ , yet unfortunately for your writing, you don't have that.

Also, the chapter breakdowns feel a little choppy to me, and some stuff needs further editing. For instance, the Jeff character could be cut completely."

Rory rolls her eyes. "Logan!"

"I'm just kidding! Mainly the problem is... there's not a market for this. Maybe if you let the idea of a book go, there would be more potential. I don't know… maybe it's just what I do now, but it feels like it would work better episodically. I've got a couple of web series going, and you could write a great treatment for this. Maybe even television."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I mean, Stars Hollow is full of supporting characters, and your mom is basically a one-woman sitcom. You know… If Paris will allow it, you should talk to Doyle. Turn it into a screenplay. Or you could try and publish as is, but with rights to screen."

Rory gives him her thousand-watt smile. "That's a great idea!"

 _She's always so surprised._

He sighs. "I'm not just a pretty face, honey."

"I'm gonna come kiss that pretty face," she says.

"Ooh. Are you still my wife, or is this my dirty fantasy?" he asks, eyebrows raised.

She sits down in his lap and whispers in his ear. "I'm sure it could be both."

* * *

 **March 2018**

"Mom called today while you were at work."

 _She calls every day._

He looks at Rory closely, and she seems slightly apprehensive. "Everything okay?"

"Well, yes. But I need to run something by you," she says.

"Shoot," he says, taking Will from her and following her into the kitchen.

"She invited Jess to our anniversary party. He was planning on being at his mom's then, and… It's okay, right? He says he wants to see the baby."

Logan purses his lips. "I know it's stupid to even question it, so I'll say… of course it's fine. We'll be completely civil."

"It _is_ stupid, sweetie. You're my husband. You're the father of my kid."

"I know." He sits down in a kitchen chair, shifting Will to his shoulder. Rory tosses him a burp cloth, and he re-situates to give him his bottle.

"So, I can tell her-"

"Did anything ever happen with you guys?" Logan interrupts. "While we were apart."

Rory looks him dead in the eye. "Um… kind of… not really… I guess… There was a weekend."

 _God. Why did I ask? I really don't want to know._

"I went to Philly, and it was great," she continues. "I thought something might come of it. But then, he kind of ghosted me. Took three days to return calls, blew off plans. And you know… the interesting thing was… I didn't really care. I didn't see him again for four years, and… it didn't matter." She shrugs her shoulders.

"It's okay," he deflects. "You don't have to-"

"It's not like it was with us. It _hurt_ when we were apart. I thought about you constantly. Wondered what you were doing, who you were with. What could have been if I'd chosen differently. I've only ever had that with you," she says.

Logan smiles. "I love you so much."

"Me too. So, what about you?" she asks.

"What about me what?"

"Oh, we're in it now. Were you serious with any of the many, many women you dated?"

"No. And there weren't _that_ many."

"Come on, Logan. I know there were a lot. In eight years, no one mattered?"

"Well, I guess… Lauren. In California. We were together for a while, and… I liked her a lot. But it turned out, same as you... I didn't really care when it was over."

"Why did you break up?" Rory asks.

"I moved to New York. Besides, she wasn't you. She never really stood a chance," he says, matter-of-factly. He looks up from Will to catch a big smile on Rory's face. "So, Jess can come. But I'll have my eye on him."

"I would expect nothing less."

* * *

A few nights later, Logan is roused from sleep when he feels Rory moving her ass provocatively against his crotch. His eyes flutter open, and he checks the clock.

 _5:19._

She reaches her hand behind her and slips it into his boxer briefs.

"Mmmm," he moans in apprecaition.

She takes his hand and pulls it around her body, placing it inside her pajama bottoms and in between her legs before placing her hand back on his erection.

 _She is raring to go._

"Good morning to you too," he whispers in her ear.

"Sex dream. Blond kid from One Direction," she mumbles.

 _Well, I'll take what I can get._

"I thought all the girls liked Harry," he says as they pull at their bottoms, tugging them to their knees.

"I think it's well-established that I have a type," she says, gasping when he enters her from behind. "Blond… Handsome… So good…"

Logan smirks before moving his hand back down front to work on her clit. Within moments, she is whimpering. He briefly thinks about a condom, but she feels too good, and he's too close anyway.

They come quickly and quietly before pulling their pants back up and snuggling deeper into their spoon.

After a few minutes, she says "That must have been the most 'married' sex we have ever had."

"What do you mean?"

"It was… lazy. We didn't even take our clothes off."

 _True. I didn't want to have to look for my underwear later..._

"So you didn't enjoy it?" he asks full of faux outrage.

"Of course I did."

He sneaks another glance at the clock. "Baby, I think you're looking at this all wrong. It's 5:26. Will should be awake, and he's not. We're on borrowed time. What's 'married' about it, is that I know your body so well that I made you come in four minutes."

"So cocky. Remember, you had a little help from Mr. Slow Hands."

"Oh you want slow hands?" he laughs, putting his hand back in between her legs. He puts his lips on her neck, and his fingers tease her until she joins her hands to his and speeds him up.

"Not that slow," she murmurs. She is just starting to roll her hips against his hand when they hear Will talking over the monitor, causing them both to still their motions.

Rory groans and rolls away from him. "I'll go get him. To be continued," she says with a meaningful glance at her husband.

"Yep. You just wait until tonight. I'll show you 'married' sex," he promises.

 _But first, I'm going back to sleep._

His eyes are closed when Rory and Will come back in. He snuggles his son close to his chest, and listens to him coo.

 _I'm the luckiest guy in the world._

* * *

 **April 2018**

One week before they are set to leave for Stars Hollow, Rory enters Will's room, just as Logan begins changing his diaper.

"Mom just ran into Dean at Doose's, and he's in town with his parents for spring break. She invited him to our party. Is that okay?" she asks.

 _Jesus H. Christ. Changing a crap-filled diaper while she asks me this... This is just... symbolism at its finest._

Logan shakes his head in disbelief. "Have her call Marty Jones too and…" He pauses to place his hands over Will's ears. "Fucking Paul. Let's make sure that every guy that has ever tried to sleep with you is there."

Rory rolls her eyes and puts her phone up to her ear. "Mom? He says 'No problem. The more, the merrier.' Okay? I'll talk to you soon."

She smiles. "I'm fairly offended that you think only four men have ever wanted to sleep with me. You've obviously forgotten about the wookie."

"Ace, we would all be better off forgetting about the wookie. And of course I know how many guys want to jump your bones on a daily basis. That barista you flirt with constantly. Eli's assistant. Will Keating in my office. He never shuts up about how pretty you are. But I'm not inviting any of _them_ to our anniversary party."

"How are you possibly still so jealous?" she asks.

He finishes Will's diaper and snaps up his onesie.

"I hate thinking about you with anyone else. Period. I will never not hate it."

"You are such a hypocrite," she says with a laugh. "I don't even know how many women you've been with."

 _Shit. Neither do I._

"I bet you don't either."

 _She knows me too well._

"Totally unimportant. I've only ever made love to one person, and that's you. You're the only one who's ever mattered," he says before picking Will up and following her to the living room.

"Yeah? Well, right back at you," she says. "Remember that."

* * *

Logan sits on the steps of the gazebo feeding Will from a pouch.

"Hey! There you guys are," Rory says, walking over and sitting down beside him.

"Sorry we disappeared. He was just getting too distracted to eat, so I brought him over here for a minute. He's getting tired."

"I can't believe how well he's done. He's off schedule, the five hour time difference, and he's still let everyone hold him. He's barely cried since we've been here."

Logan smirks. "Come on, Ace. He's half me and half you. Of course he's awesome."

Logan places Will's feet down and lets him bounce in his arms for a minute. He and Rory make faces until he giggles.

"This was actually really nice of your mom and Luke to put all of this together," Logan admits.

"Well, it's very nice of _you_ to be so pleasant to everyone here. I appreciate it," she says.

"Yeah… I thought about it, and I mean… I got you. I won. I shouldn't rub it in their faces, no matter how tempting," he says, failing to keep the smile off of his face.

Logan shifts Will back into his lap as Rory scoots close and links her arm through his.

"It's been a good year. You're happy, right?" she asks.

"Ace, I could not be happier." He turns to kiss her temple, then gazes back out at the party. They spend a few minutes watching Stars Hollow celebrate them.

"Babe?" she says quietly.

"Yeah?" he says, turning to look at her.

"I'm pregnant."

His eyes widen.

 _Well, I guess I was wrong. I **can** be happier._

"I know we haven't talked about another kid, and Will's not even one. And this is totally unplanned and irresponsible. And we'll have to name the baby Niall. And he'll ask 'Why is my name Niall?' and I'll have to say 'Because I had a sex dream about him, and I woke up all horny for your dad, because when your dad was twenty-three he looked exactly like-'"

Logan cuts her off with a kiss. He pulls back to smile at her, and he can feel it spread all over his face- eyes crinkling, dimples flashing. Will is babbling in his lap, and he can't believe how amazing his life is.

He can only think of one thing to say. One thing that will reassure her. One thing that will reassure him.

One thing that puts all of his heart into words.

"Rory, I love you."

* * *

A/N: Last four words courtesy of Matt Czuchry, the number one Rogan shipper!

Thank you all so much for your support. I've gotten a ton of prompts from you for other ideas for stories. I'll probably get to some of them after a little break to recharge my creativity. Add me to author alert if you're interested!


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